They both noticed it, but hadn't said a word.
It was amazing, really, how far they've come in this thing called 'friendship', a gift said that it is never ending and circles back again. The saying was true, proven through all of their quarrels, Jake Martinez, Maverick, and Schneider. They always found a way back together with a bump of their knuckles in a 'thumbs up' which was a silent commitment that lasted forever.
That's because they're the best of friends.
That's because they're destined work partners.
But, that's only what they seem to want to see, for the stupid sake of the other.
Now, they're always together, so much so that it's rare to see one without the other. They only seem to hang out with each other in their spare time and mask their slight irritation if someone else decides to join. They get gloomy when they can't be with the other one, their heads mercilessly filling itself with lonely thoughts of that person. Sometimes, they would personally hang out all day without a care in the world at the other one's flat, maybe a little, casual slumber party was in order. It became such a habit that there were spare keys and foreign clothes and accessories(like a forgotten hat or a pair of glasses) that were suddenly remembered to belong to the other one.
That's what BFF's, friends, close coworkers do...right?
The other heroes around them noticed such closeness, how they stand and walk so closely knit to each other, how their inside jokes make no sense to anyone but them with rich laughs. Some think it's damn unfair, others think it was only a matter of time. Maybe being forced to be partners was a good thing for the both of them as they never were ambitious to make new relationships, their almost magnetic attraction to each other was proof enough.
Around Christmas time, they're especially close, and not just for warmth in the windy, snow covered city such as Sternbild. Barnaby still has a tough time with coping and surviving the gruesome memories, ugly nightmares, dizzy dreams, and booming flashbacks of the two people who loved him most in the world. Nowadays, with his partner around, Barnaby seems to be doing better than his other years as Kotetsu helps him climb the steep stages of his depression and drunken nights.
On a night planned to be done in finishing an entire bottle of red wine, anger, fat tears, and passing out in the black 'spinny' chair, Kotetsu says these words that lift his spirits very high. Too high.
"Get away from here," He responds to Barnaby's cold attitude when his strategic offer to hang out is quickly turned down, on the twenty-first, before that damn holiday. "Come with me to my family's home for the holidays, it would do you some good. You'll only make yourself feel worse by staying here alone."
Barnaby looks down at his white boots with uncertainty. "I wouldn't want to impose." He then looks back at the shorter, bearded man with a finely plucked, furrowed brow. "Besides, that time is for you and your family, I can't take any more of it."
Kotetsu smiles at this a little. "Come oooon, my family would love it if you joined us, Kaede would be especially thrilled. I mean, we consider you family anyway, so you might as well come with me."
"Really?"
"Yup." Kotetsu says proudly. "And you definitely don't want to miss out on the New Year's parade that has outstanding music, food, and floats with a fireworks show, not to mention."
The way the old man sounds almost like he belongs in a commercial makes Barnaby's sad lips skeptically quirk upwards a tad which encourages the other to continue the persuasion.
"Also, you get to eat my mother's Christmas dinner which is out of this world, being a part-time bartender/worker at Kaburagi Liquor Store(which is a lot more fun than you think), ice skating, and knowing the joys of cozy futons and kotatsus!"
"Well," Barnaby starts again.
"You know you want to." Kotetsu nudges his arm. "And I may or may not drag you there by force as I might have given the hint of chance that you'd be coming to my daughter who may or may not be your biggest fan."
The blonde laughs this time, feeling like he hasn't done that, not forced for the bright cameras, in a while. "I'll go," He says in fain defeat which earns him a triumphant 'yes!' from the old man. "When do we leave?"
"We actually leave tomorrow at noon, if that's not a problem...?"
"Why didn't you ask me earlier!?" All this time the blonde could have had something to look forward to and have the advantage of neatly preparing for the vacation from his own insane, solitary confinement. Kotetsu knows about his obsessive need to be prepared and organized, the bastard.
"Well, I was going to but we got caught up with work with that weird cloning Santa thief with the disappearing elves and that creepy girl who kept possessing people that I sorta forgot..." Kotetsu says with a slight wince. "But, hey, at least you have time to pack and the company knows we're gone!"
Barnaby sighed, he should be used to Kotetsu's carelessness. "For how long?"
"'til the first."
"And where do we meet?"
"At the train station entrance near Bronze Stage."
And that was that. Barnaby put up no more fuss and Kotetsu was worry free from thinking that he'd be all alone in that cold, empty apartment of his, possibly drunk or halfway dead. Even if the blonde refused because he'd rather sob in the lonesome, they both could promise that the brunette would storm into his house, pack up his things, and stuff everything(and one) into his green truck. This could be considered kidnapping, but Kotetsu thinks of it more as a 'search and rescue'.
With somewhat pleasant good nights as they separated for their own places, the lonely feeling crept behind them again but they ignored it with strong wills. They would never admit their uncontrollable longing for each others' very presence, possibly in fear of rejection or their own red faces in embarrassment.
Christ, they grew on each other to the point it was crippling.
As they packed and triple checked, thinking of the impossible events where they would need this and that or an extra, they thought of each other. This would be the first holiday together which hopelessly made them excited; they would do so many fun things that some of which they've never done together before. The holidays would be a brighter one on both parts. Satisfaction guaranteed.
This was when they realized as they rolled up and packed extra pairs of socks and underwear with a dreamy sigh that-
"I love him."
Wait...
Love!? As in, what the teenagers say these days, "like-like"? It didn't feel brotherly, it certainly didn't feel at all like family love. These flying, flinging feelings about their stomachs felt a hell of a lot more than friendship or tricky admiration.
Now that they thought about it, is it that they're in love with each other which made them spend so much time together and think of each other constantly(especially alone)? They feel like they've felt this for a while which explains their closeness. And they're partners, they're said, expected, foretold, that they're supposed to be like this; all natural closeness. Besides, they're both men, one's older with a child, and the other has such a promising future. Yet, it feels like it's perfectly normal to be in romantically involved, they were more attracted to who the person was more than their looks anyway(even though, now that they're on the subject, they wouldn't mind taking a...closer look).
Kotetsu will admit that he's a little more heterosexual than he is bisexual. He isn't as confused with this 'like-like' thing, but is more than upset to have to suppress this feeling. He knows that Barnaby would never, ever feel the same way and is prepared to deal with the excruciating pains of unrequited love, prepared to watch the young man fall in love with a lucky lady and have his very own family. On terms with Tomoe, from all of their conversations and thoughts on the future, he knows that she wants very much for him to move on. Tomoe was selfless and was willing to let go if the situation called for it like that. So, he's carried heavier on his shoulders, he reassures himself as he stops his pause from packing with a nodded frown.
Barnaby, on the other hand, never really thought a lot on his sexuality with being busy in his pursuit of his parents' murderer, desperately showing pictures of that damned Ourobourus sign to strangers for an answer. He seemed to know that he was attracted to women but, he never thought about men and when he did, it was a bit of disgusting thought. But, when he thinks of being in love with Kotetsu and romantic situations with them together, it feels like it's something they were supposed to do now(and why hadn't they done it yet?). He does realize that this couldn't be mutual love, for Kotetsu still wears his wedding ring, a symbol of a prolonging love for that dead woman.
They don't believe it, they don't want to.
And it hurts.
…
The awaited meet and train ride into Oriental Town was event-less, with no last minute calls from Agnes to jump in their suits to catch someone who felt the absolute need to ruin a particular day. Kotetsu did say that he sent 'just in case' emails to the company, the other heroes, Agnes(she asked for possible pictures or maybe a little vlog for the Hero TV Christmas Special), Lloyds, and the camera crew that he and Barnaby wouldn't be back until after New Year's. They all speedily replied with best wishes and hopeful for their quick return.
It was then when they settled into their seats that Barnaby noticed the two, very large bags, both stuffed to the brim with presents that ranged in wrapping and size.
"Are those all for your family? Not to be rude, but that looks like a lot for just three people." Barnaby asks, letting curiosity possess him.
"Well, these are presents from the other heroes for all of us, presents that I bought for my family, and you." Kotetsu says, looking in the bags again and silently counting all the cubes, rectangles, and cylinders.
Barnaby stares at him in surprise, a slight pink on his pale cheeks. The person who he is in love with, the person he finds to be a very special someone who has a busy life of his own, went out of his way to buy him a present.
"What?" Kotetsu asks, breaking the blonde's thought processes as he notices the long gaze. The man hates being stared at, something he learned about himself when having to live through the prejudice of people without powers in his younger years.
"I'm sorry. It's just..." Barnaby looks away from him. "I didn't think you'd buy me a present..."
"Pfft, how could I not? It would be more of a surprise if I didn't get you one." Kotetsu smiled at him before turning his attention to the window to watch the city retreat from them.
The blonde looked at his suitcase, he did buy a present or two for the old man and his kid. He guessed he could mix them up under the Christmas tree with the other boxes instead of saying that he bought something outright. Who doesn't like surprises? Yet, he would never admit that he was a bit too shy to give it to the brunette; he's never really given a gift to someone he cares a lot for before. He only hoped that he, truly, really liked it. The blonde knows how great of an actor Kotetsu is and his many characters he plays to convenience the likes of others.
Arriving to Kotetsu's hometown was peaceful, with a lot of people getting off the train at their stops in different towns before their own, made the ride very, nicely, quiet. The view of the countryside looked breathtaking compared to the twinkling, rambunctious city, even if most of it was covered thickly in bright, sparkling, white snow.
Hopping off of the train, they sat at the very small, wooden station's bench. Only two others waited at the station there, an old woman with her granddaughter who looked no older then seven. The old woman noticed Kotetsu and said something nice in Japanese to the brunette. Kotetsu replied in the same language, sounding the utmost thankful. When he spoke in that foreign language, it sounded pleasant to Barnaby, even though he didn't understand a single lick of it.
Kotetsu looked around near the tracks, not finding his brother's truck said to be picking them up. As much as they both would love to walk and enjoy the country for all that it was all the way to their destination, the weather was freezing so that wouldn't be very fun.
A few minutes later, a yellow, spongecake of a vehicle drove up close to the station and honked twice at the two partners. In black lettering was there the title of the family liquor store on the door of their ride.
"That's us." Kotetsu said, getting off the bench and miraculously carrying everything to stuff in the back of the truck. Barnaby followed closely, being extra careful now that he had almost slipped on a slyly covered ice patch as well as growing a grey hair or two from the stress of watching the brunette carrying so many things at once where anything could make it all violently topple to the ground.
The cold wind that blew, spraying snowflakes in their direction made them more thankful of the old truck and its quick trip into the neighborhood.
…
"Dad!" Kaede exclaimed excitedly upon seeing the truck pull up to the warm house, running over to it in her boots that she hurriedly slipped on, couldn't wait enough for the doorbell. She met her father halfway down the driveway, giving him one of her rare hugs for it was the holidays after all. It didn't last long as Kaede was too grownup for long hugs. Too many friends, too many cool clothes where a family hug could crush such things in front of people.
"Daddy missed you Kade~!" Kotetsu exclaimed, grabbing her tightly again before she could run away.
"Ugh...come on, dad, let go." The preteen complained, Kotetsu decided to listen to her this time. Holidays will be treated as such.
"Uncle treated me badly in the car and I was hoping for a little love~!"
"Did not!" Muramasa yelled from the behind the car in helping with the luggage load. "He kept bothering me!"
Which was true, Kotetsu purposely bugged him for shits and giggles until he was threatened to get his ass kicked. When asked why, he only responded that it was a fun thing to do to pass the time. It was his talent.
"That's a lie!"
Kaede pinched the bridge of her nose at their immaturity. Sometimes, she wondered, if twelve year-olds were becoming the adults these days. Then again, she doesn't have the slightest know-how on building a piece of Swedish furniture or paying a bill. Either way, she-
"Barnaby!" She exclaimed when she spotted the blonde, who smiled kindly at her as he rolled his big, red suitcase up driveway. "How are you? I haven't seen you in forever!"
"I'm doing great, thank you, and can't wait to spend the holidays with you." The blonde said, putting his hands on his knees to see her at almost eye to eye level. "It's very nice to see you, are you doing well?"
"I'm doing awesome! Come on inside!" Her entire focus was put towards the blonde as she led him inside the warm house, the two Japanese men long forgotten. They watched as he was greeted by Anju who hugged him unexpectedly and pulled him inside as well.
"Kids these days," Kotetsu sighed. "Seems like their attention span is that of a chipmunk."
"She pays more attention than you do, dad." Muramasa said cheekily, pulling out the bags of presents and kicking the doors closed.
With a haughty "shut up", they entered the house, greeted by Anju. The old women gave her youngest son a kiss on the cheek and a welcome back.
"It's good to be back, Ma."
…
Barnaby settled in the Kotetsu's old bedroom in the thin walled but surprisingly warm house that very evening. He was offered a large, empty dresser that he could share with the older man so that they weren't living entirely out of their suitcases. The colors in the room made it peaceful, the shade of green definitely chosen well to match with the pale floors. There weren't any kinds of bedding set up anywhere, so he guessed that the futons were folded up in the closet near the door as he organized his neatly folded clothes in the two drawers out of the four that he had claimed.
He suddenly hears a woman softly laugh behind him and sharply turns around to meet the small shrine for what looked like to be Kotetsu's late wife. She was beautiful, her hair long and straight, her eyes were small but were so loud with thick lashes, and her lips were full with that smile of hers. Incense surrounded her picture as well as slips of paper with prayers written on them in Japanese. The blonde remembered seeing Tomoe in a couple of photos in Kotetsu's apartment, but had never really looked at her until now.
"It's nice to meet you, I'm Barnaby," He says with a bow to the shrine. "Thank you for watching over us."
Why he felt the need to suddenly do that, he doesn't know, but he knows that it was something that couldn't be helped. He had one of those impulsive gut feelings, that his partner usually spoke of, that he should at least say something.
"Bunny, dinner's ready!" He hears Kotetsu call from down the hallway.
"I'll be right there!" He yells back, quickly finishing up unpacking and heading for the evening's meal. He cannot remember the last time he had a family dinner at all. Sure, all the heroes had gone out together for a meal or two and a few of the heroes proclaimed them all as family, but it never felt exactly so to the blonde even though he trusted them all with his life.
The food was one of the best Barnaby has ever tasted, but he knows this isn't the 'out of this world' Christmas dinner. Now, he realizes, he has something else to look forward to. The food was the last thing on his list when thinking of the best things at dinner. It was the people that were there, all sitting around, talking, laughing, and sharing like being apart from each other for so long never happened. It was what made his shoulders sag in relaxation, it was what made him think that not coming would have been the worst mistake.
"Could you pass the salt?" Muramasa asked his younger brother.
"The salt?" Kotetsu asked, acting like he didn't hear him.
"Yeah, the salt."
"But, not the pepper?"
"Only the salt."
"Just the salt?"
"Just the salt."
"And the pepper?"
"I only want-"
"What about paprika?"
"Kotetsu, if you don't-"
"Okay! I'm sorry, I'm just messing with you!" Kotetsu laughed, passing him the small, plain salt shaker.
Barnaby laughed, he certainly wouldn't mind staying here even after New Year's and Kotetsu could see it, smiling at him when he noticed the blonde's joy. The table felt full again, the empty seat that use to be awkward was now filled with another loved one. Kaede chatted Barnaby up a bit, it sounded almost like friends catching up more than anything else which is fine...as long as the blonde doesn't get too close to a certain someone's daughter. Some topics brought an entire table debate and discussion which felt too nice to ignore and not contribute to it.
After plates were cleaned, the two partners both didn't mind cleaning up the kitchen afterwards so that the others could prepare for putting up and decorating the tree. The sound of rushing water with the clinking of dishes revealed Barnaby scrubbing away with a blue sponge and Kotetsu drying each piece of cutlery with a white towel.
"You wanna help decorate?" Kotetsu asked as he dried another plate and put it away. He understands that there are certain holiday activities that Barnaby particularly avoids because of his runaway mind.
"Sure," He replied. "Sounds fun." He added as he rinsed off another plate. He was grinning, but didn't know it.
"I see you're enjoying yourself already," The brunette says with a knowing smile and playful nudge.
"Come on, old man," The blonde said with an embarrassed chuckle. Of course he was enjoying himself, this place was close enough to be a damn paradise.
"I realize now..." The brunette says, giving the blonde a grin. "I finally get to say it!"
The blonde looked at his old man with a 'of course' look, but still smiles nonetheless.
"I told you so!"