Title: Birthday Cleanup
Author: surreysmum
Pairing: L/A
Warning: crackfic
A/N: Written (a little late) for the birthday of the incomparable and ever-supportive Ana Library Elf, whose reviews are an art form in themselves.
Birthday Cleanup
"We what?" Aragorn asked Legolas, appalled. They stood in the Great Library of Gondor, and Principles of Kingship: noblesse oblige lay half-open and ignored in Aragorn's hands.
"It is true, I am sorry to say," replied Legolas ruefully. "We forgot Ana Library Elf's birthday."
Aragorn closed the book and returned it to its shelf. "That simply will not do," he said, and he put his head closer to Legolas' pointed ear and started to whisper. A few ranges over, the Library Elf smiled, unable to hear their conversation, but knowing that when these two plotted together, whatever happened would be good.
A few moments later, a Ranger - still scruffy, for all the efforts that the court had made to tame him - and a pristine Elf approached Ana purposefully.
"We are hoping you could do us a small favour this morning," Legolas said.
"My library is your library," responded the Library Elf cheerfully.
"Actually," put in Aragorn, his cheekbones tinted very slightly, "the favour would not be in the library."
The Library Elf made a small moue. "I have much work to do," she said regretfully. "Ordering, cataloguing, sorting, shelving - it is a large library for only one Elf. Why, even getting Faramir to return his books on time is a full time job!"
Two pairs of eyes, grey and blue, widened pleadingly. "It is very important," said Legolas. "I have finally persuaded this filthy human to let me scrub him clean under the waterfall, and since I too must go under the waterfall, we are in desperate need of a kind friend to hold the towels and enwrap us in them when we emerge."
"Wellll…" demurred the Library Elf with a little smile.
"Please?" Aragorn placed a warm, weathered hand over hers.
"Please?" Legolas dared a little kiss to her cheek.
"Oh, all right!" she replied, her little smile turning into a broad grin.
"Hooray!" shouted Legolas, and with one graceful motion he swept Aragorn up and over his shoulder, and strode down the corridor to the cupboard containing the linens. Aragorn struggled in jest the whole way there, his flailing hands coming in contact with all sorts of interesting places, much to the Library Elf's delight as she followed demurely behind. Aragorn caught her gaze and gave her a big wink.
And so, big fluffy towels in hand, the Library Elf spent the next two hours - for it was a long and very thorough scrubbing, with all sorts of novel angles and positions and techniques that were really quite educational - enjoying the fresh air and the lovely scenery. And, strange to report, not once did she think about sorting and shelving.
finis