I was looking for purely Kaider fics and found precious little. They say when you can't find what you want, make it for yourself. So here I am, bag and baggage, with my fair share of Kaider fics. Just as heads up, these will mainly be heartbreaking, angst-ridden pieces because there aren't nearly enough of those.
I promise (Modern AU)
"You will be okay, right?"
"Yeah, don't worry about me."
"Cinder, I'm hardwired to worry about you."
"If you say so."
"Look at me. Cinder no, don't do this."
"You're the one doing things here Kaito."
"This is as much your decision as it is mine."
"Whatever you say, Kai."
"Just don't freeze me out entirely. We've had too much happen between us."
"I'll keep that in mind."
"I'm only doing what's sensible and best for both of us."
Silence
The microwave beeps to draw the boy up from his knees once the mechanic's footsteps have faded. If only leftover love could be reheated like the previous night's pasta.
"You're being stupid Kai."
"She seems to want it."
"Did she tell you she wants it?"
"She didn't say she doesn't either."
"Did she say anything at all?"
"No."
"Then you're assuming things."
"Carswell, silence is as good as agreement."
"Not with Cinder. You've been living with her for years. You should know this."
"I don't know anything anymore."
"Talk to her about it."
"It's like talking to a wall."
"Have you ever really tried."
"More times than I can remember."
"Try once more."
"She didn't protest when I broke up with her. She helped me pack my things."
"Kai -"
"I know you're her best friend. I know you know the matter, whatever it is. And I know that if you aren't telling me, it's because she told you not to. That's alright. We've spent the majority of our years without knowing each other. How difficult can it be to go back to that?"
Difficult enough that the bartender learns to keep a sleeping bag and spare pillows in the backroom.
"You're not happy, he's not happy and you've both fallen sick. He was hospitalised for alcohol poisoning. You haven't been eating. And it's just been a fortnight."
"So what do you suggest we do Iko?"
"Get back."
"And break more crockery? Have him accuse me of cheating again?"
"If you just told him that Dimitri is your shrink -"
"Iko please. He has enough to worry about without me adding to it."
"Cinder this is clinical depression. It's his business to know."
"It doesn't matter anymore, he left remember?"
"That's because he thought you weren't happy with him. Just tell him about Dimitri."
"There's no point Iko."
Even the wall clock wished its hands could move the other way.
"Cinder?"
"Hi."
"It's past midnight."
"I know."
"Do you want me to come over?"
"Yes. Please."
"I'm on my way love."
"Thanks, Scar."
The traffic lights are conspiratorially green and the streets ceremoniously empty.
"Why did you never tell me Cinder? Why? None of this would have happened then."
He holds her fingers, the only part of her that isn't strapped on to a machine. He convinces himself that, if not for the ventilator, she would answer him. And, burning as he is to press her against each sinew in his body and coax out answers with all the kisses he can, he will turn to ashes if it means the machine will pump a little more air into her lungs; if it will keep her alive a little while longer.
"I promise I'll never let you go Cinder. I promise."
Her suicide note lay, crumpled and tear stained, in his pocket.
Well, that's the first one. Review?