Title: Take Me Away
Author: Evan James
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2902 without the song lyrics
Warnings: OOC, AU Non-con, Mild Religious Theme
Summery: Harry tries to deal with the recent events of his life while being the perfect little hero everyone wants (Song fic for Holy Water by Big & Rich from the Horse of a Different Color album.)
Unbeta'd for now.
The air was crisp and cool, not a cloud in the sky, an absolutely perfect day for Quidditch. Severus Snape was less than semi- hopeful that Slytherin would take the win there by insuring the cup, not with Potter's spawn playing. Though Severus admitted only to himself that the boy was a natural on a broom, the air was his element.
As the boy in question speed past the stands where the dire potions master sat with his house, Severus could see the bright green eyes filled with an innocent happiness that had been painfully absent since that blasted mutt Black had to go and get himself killed the year before.
When Potter was in the air, Severus could see Lily alive and shining in the boys eyes. He had a look of pure delight when on his broom not truly caring about the game, it was for the joy of flying alone that brought out that long absent gleam. 'How a devil like James Potter could sire such an angel, I will never…' Severus cut his thoughts abruptly, closing his eyes and shaking his head, disgusted by his own thoughts. 'I must be coming down with something…Yes, that is it. I am getting delusional.'
Pinching the bridge of his nose, Severus gave a short nod, glad that he had diagnosed the problem. It was the sharp collective gasp followed by the piercing scream of "HARRY" that forced Severus' attention back to the game. Severus had figured that once again Potter had injured himself in someway but in the instant it took him to assess the pitch and the chaos that surrounded him; Severus knew that injury was not the case.
The heart he'd thought long dead froze, both seekers were gone. Hearing the shouts and crying coming from the Gryffindor seats, Severus knew that Harry Potter had been kidnapped
Somewhere there's a stolen halo
I use to watch him wear it well
everything would shine wherever he would go
but looking at him now you'd never tell
Harry awoke to the smug face of Draco Malfoy smirking at him, but it was the fact that he was bound naked in thick silver chains and the disabilitating pain in his head that made the normally fearless young man pale in terror.
"Well, well, Potter, looks like I win the cup this year." Malfoy crowed in his alarmingly high voice.
Steadying himself, Harry focused on the familiar target. "Malfoy, please enter puberty soon, your voice is most annoying. Until then, do kindly shut the fuck up you are giving me a headache. Go tell your master I am awake like a good little pet." Harry spat the final word.
"We will see who the pet is when My Lord is done with you, Potter." Malfoy smiled. Harry's fear grew, Malfoy did not smile. He smirked, he frowned, he glared but Malfoy did not ever smile. With a mockingly gentle caress of Harry's face, Malfoy turned away and left the small room that Harry was chained in naked and helpless.
The following hours became a blur of pain and humiliation for the once proud Gryffindor. He had been whipped, cursed and raped so many times in the last however many hours he had been there by both of the Malfoys and by Voldemort himself, who seemed get sick enjoyment from the fact that his mere touch added to the pain of the rapes that it all seemed to blend together.
It was when Voldemort started to force his way into Harry's mind that the boy finally snapped. Harry would endure anything that Voldemort could and would inflect on him but Harry refused to betray his friends and the order.
Unknowing how, Harry released the heavy chains that kept him bound to the wall, stunning the Malfoys and Voldemort before his magic gave out on him. Shaking his head trying to clear his thoughts, Harry crawled over the immobile self-proclaimed Dark Lord and twisted his neck. Harry found himself oddly gratified to hear the sickening sound of the delicate bones snapping.
Filled with furry for what had been taken from him, Harry wreaked his vengeance against the Malfoys picking up one of the daggers that had been used to carve into his flesh, Harry insured that the Malfoy line would die out with Lucius and Draco. But he let them live. It was up to fate and the speed of the Aurors to decide if the two bleeding men would survive for long.
Stumbling through the maze of corridors of, what Harry believed was the famed Malfoy manor, naked and still bleeding in many places; Harry finally found a fireplace and a silver tin of Floo powder. Before tossing the floo powder in to the searing flames, Harry absentmindedly threw the two foul freshly severed pieces of flesh, he had not even been aware he was still carrying, into the fire watching with insane glee as they burned.
When he was certain that nothing remained of the two offending organs Harry, unthinkingly, Flooed to the only place he had ever felt truly safe.
Severus Snape was shocked when a naked and bloody Harry Potter fell out of his fire and onto the elegant rug in his living quarters. It took several moments for him to pull himself together enough to wrap the broken boy in his robes.
"Voldemort gone… Malfoys bleeding … at manor…think… Might want … send help." Severus paled as the now savior of the wizarding world lost consciousness in his arms.
Years later, students would still talk about the mad dash the overly stern Potions Master made for the infirmary with the fallen Savior in his arms.
Someone ran away with his innocence
A memory he can't get out of his head
I can only imagine what he's feeling
When he's praying
Kneeling at the edge of his bed
A week later Harry was still in the Infirmary, all the students have been sent home to celebrate the destruction of Voldemort, no one could understand why Harry refused to go any where or the fact that the boy was depressed and hurting.
"You should be happy Harry. You are finally free of the wanker, what more could you want? Come on, mate, there's a wicked party tonight. You should go and celebrate with us, you deserve it." Ron had pushed but Harry refused yet again, finally Ron had left him alone and rode the Hogwarts Express away still complaining, Harry heard later, that Harry was being selfish not willing to celebrate with friends.
Harry hadn't heard much of anything from Hermione but then again exams were not far off and the girl must be frantic with the loss of classroom hours.
Harry sat alone in bed, wrapped in a warm blanket and stared endlessly at the brass plaque that the Weasley twins had added to the bed Harry normally occupied when he was in the Infirmary as a joke.
"Potter's Place" it proudly proclaimed to the world. Harry wanted to agree but he felt he no longer had a place that he could be safe from the demons that haunted him.
Half remember scenes from his time held captive tormented the boy when he slept so, eventually he just stopped sleeping. He was also unable to keep anything down, visions of Voldemort enjoying a massive feast while Draco and Lucius had their way with his body had spoiled food for him.
No, Harry Potter felt nothing if not terror at the thought of celebrating.
While staring at that small plaque, Petunia's voice sounded in his torment twisted mind. A half remembered speech that Petunia had once given to Dudley.
"Give your troubles to God. Ask him for his help and he will give his aid, if you are sincere"
With nothing left to loose, for the first time in his life, Harry knelt at the foot of his bed, folded his hands and raised his voice to the heavens…
And he says take me away
then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me like holy water
Holy water
Severus Snape stood in the shadow of the infirmary doors watching over the distraught boy. He had promised Lily after her death that he would see her son through all that may find the boy but in this, his was lost. A single tear rolled down the silent man's face as he listened to the boy's mournful prayer.
He wants someone to call him angel
Someone to put the light back in his eyes
He's looking through the faces
The unfamiliar places
He needs someone to hear him when he cries
Harry returned to the house on Privet Drive, only to once again be locked into the too small cupboard by his infuriated uncle upon learning that Harry had killed Voldemort at last.
"I refuse to have a murder loose in my house, you little freak!" Vernon had screeched red faced as he threw Harry into the cupboard under the stairs locking the abomination away from the watchful eyes of the all too nosy neighbors.
Harry lost track of time as his sat in the cupboard a photo album his only company. Looking at the smiling faces of his long dead parents, Harry mourned their loss anew. He had finally avenged their death and he was being punished for the crime.
Dumbledore had forced the boy savior back to his own personal hell "There are many Death Eaters still at large, my boy, Privet drive is the safest place for you. I will explain everything to your family, don't you worry about a thing."
Oh yes, Dumbledore had explained everything alright. And the cupboard had been the price of his freedom from Voldemort.
Turning the pages of the album slowly, Harry glimpsed at photo after photo, all the smiling people in his life, some gone, some that still remain but he could no longer feel a connection to any of them.
As he was looking at a photo of a waving Hermione with her Arithomancy book propped in her lap, Harry's attention was drawn not to the smiling face of his friend but to a couple in the background in a loving embrace. Tears again filled his perpetually red rimmed eyes as he watched the unknown lovers give each other a gentle but passion filled kiss.
He knew, in his heart, that no one would want him now, not as defiled as he was. But oh, how he longed for that. Harry wanted nothing more than a loving partner who would hold him through the fears, to call him loving names in hushed gentle tones, and fight back the demons that haunted his long sleepless nights.
Once again, as the pain and longing for what he could not have overtook him, Harry knelt and with a heavy heart he lifted his voice to a God he doubted was even listening…
And he says take me away
then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me like holy water
Holy water
Severus watched the plain but well cared for house on Privet Drive, hoping that he would catch even a glimpse of the boy that still haunted his thoughts. He did not know nor care anymore why, but it was imperative that he find out the wellbeing of the young man that lived in the house. No one had heard from the boy since he had been forced to return. It seemed that only Snape was concerned about the abnormal silence.
He just needs a little help
To wash away the pain he's felt
He wants to feel the healing hands
Of someone who understands
Harry's final year at Hogwarts should have been filled with fun and smiles. He had no worries left to plague him. Voldemort and his Death Eaters were but a painful memory, even Draco Malfoy was no longer even an irritant, as the formerly pride of Slytherin was now living in obscurity trying to make the best of his life, hopefully asking himself continuously 'Why did I have to fuck with Potter?'
The gifted Healers at St. Mungo's had been unable to corrected the mutilation that the blond had received from Harry that fateful day in April. The Wizengamot had decided that since Harry had enacted his own retribution, Draco would not be punished further by serving prison time for the rape of the boy savior. Harry had an odd smile on his face as he watched Draco Malfoy cringe at the mere sight of the Wizarding World's Hero during the trial.
Harry was still depressed by the events of that night so long ago, though, even now that it was going on late December. No one understood his despondent mood; Harry should have been at the top of the world. That could not be further from the truth.
The evening before the students were to leave on for the winter Hols, the first in a couple of years that no one worried if their friends were going to return, the anger and resentment that Ron Weasley was feeling came to a head.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? You haunt this place. You are nothing but a ghost most of the time. Upset that you aren't special anymore? No more special lessons now that you know who is gone." Ron yelled silencing the common room of Gryffindor tower. "Can't stand not being in the spot light any more? What not enough accolades for the Savior, is that it? Get over it, Harry. You're not special anymore. You're now just like the rest of us. A student, nothing more, nothing less. You should be happy not… this" Ron waved his hand in disgust indicating Harry's frail and unkempt appearance.
Hearing his friend turn on him once again Harry let loose all the pain he had been feeling since April. All the painful memories and traumas that he had kept from his friends for the last 8 months, came rushing to his mind unbidden.
'You want to know what is wrong with me, Ronald Bilius Weasley? Fine, I will tell you. You are all so happy that I killed Voldemort and he can't touch you any more that's all fine for you all, I am truly happy for you but do you want to know what I see when I close my eyes at night, well do you?" Harry paused momentarily waiting for an answer. At the now unsure nod from his friend, Harry went on.
"I woke to Draco Malfoy's smug face taunting me as I was naked and chained to a wall. Then the prat his father and Voldemort where there, taking their turns with me, raping me tearing me apart, but that wasn't enough for them, oh no they had to go further, insuring that I would never forget what they did to me." Harry screamed before unbuttoning his shirt revealing his body to another for the first time since he disappeared from the pitch that last game. Tearing off his clothes Harry stood in nothing but his boxer hanging precariously off too thin protruding hips, his trousers around his ankles. "Take a good look Ron."
Ron and the rest of Gryffindor were horrified by what they saw. All along Harry's body were the scars from a whip still pink and puckered. The worst part were the words carved into his flesh 'whore' above his heart, 'freak' across his stomach, 'slut' low on his abdomen right above his boxers, down his right side over his ribs was the word 'scarhead' courtesy of Draco. Poppy Pomfrey had been unable to prevent the scarring due to the anti-healing charms on the weapons used.
"Do you want to know how Voldemort sat and ate a fucking feast while he watched the Malfoys carve into me, while they whipped me, while the fucked me over and over again. That is what I remember ever time I try to eat and you know the really fucked up part. It was thoughts of you and Mione and your family and the order and the rest of you." Harry made a wide sweeping motion with his hand indicating the gathered students in the common room. "That finally gave me the strength to finish it. Voldemort tried to enter my mind but I had to protect you all from him. So I killed him, I snapped his fucking neck." Harry looked into the pale faces of those around him not one was without tears pouring from their eyes. Hermione was huddled in the arms of Neville Longbottom the only person in the school it seemed, who had not, at one time or another, condemned Harry.
"You remember this when you are all at home with your families this hols and you thank every god you can think of that you weren't the one to pay the price of freedom. I paid for all you weak fuckers who were too scared to lift a finger to help me rather then condemn me for being human. My family and I paid in blood; I owe you nothing because I have nothing left to give!" With that Harry pulled up his trousers fastening them as he made his way from the dorm leaving his friends and his shirt behind, by the time he reached the grand staircase he was running as hard as he could, hoping to maybe out run the pain.
He fell to his knees on the hard stone floor of the second floor girl's bathroom, his head thrown back towards the heavens above…
And he says take me away
then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me
Unknowingly, Harry's desperate and heart wrenching prayer was over heard. Harry found himself in a tight embraced. Wrapped in strong arms encased in black, unable to see through the tears Harry couldn't have cared who it was. He felt cared for the first time in so long. Gentle soothing words, he could not understand, were whispered in his ear while his was rocked gently, the person trying to sooth away the hurt.
Harry turn into those strong arms wrapping his own painfully thin arms around the only soul in the world that had cared enough to offer the simplest of comforts to the one that had paid a heavy price for peace. Burying his face into a long slim neck and held on as tight as he could…
And he says take me away
then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me like holy water
Holy water
Reaching the boundary of the Anti-apparition wards, Severus Snape wrapped Harry tighter in his own too large black robes that he had taken off not long before, after finding the boy alone and screaming his pray for anyone to hear. Having insured that the boy was warm enough, he pulled him close, placing a gentle kiss on the scared forehead of the boy he had come to love in spite of himself. Looking into those haunted green eyes, Severus asked the most important question he could think of.
"Where do you want to go, Angel?"
Original Lyrics
Somewhere there's a stolen halo
I use to watch her wear it well
Everything would shine wherever she would go
But looking at her now you'd never tell
Someone ran away with her innocence
A memory she can't get out of her head
I can only imagine what she's feeling
When she's praying
Kneeling at the edge of her bed
And she says take me away
Then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me like holy water
Holy water
She wants someone to call her angel
Someone to put the light back in her eyes
She's looking through the faces
The unfamiliar places
She needs someone to hear her when she cries
And she says take me away
Then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me like holy water
Holy water
She just needs a little help
To wash away the pain she's felt
She wants to feel the healing hands
Of someone who understands
And she says take me away
then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me
And she says take me away
then take me farther
Surround me now
And hold, hold, hold me like holy water
Holy water