Finding Hope in Despair

Chapter 1 – Escape

The Terminus.

They called it a Sanctuary, a safe haven where people could find security and shelter away from the walking dead that threatened them. Those that saw the signs believed it was foolish not to seek this place out and so they followed the train tracks full of hope that they would find somewhere to rest peacefully, somewhere to eat a decent meal…And how wrong they all were.

Katelyn had no idea how long she had been here, stuck within the confines of the so-called Sanctuary. The days seemed to blur together into a constant stream of torture, punishment and despair, waiting and waiting for her end. At times she believed that those at the Terminus had forgotten about her, that perhaps she would starve to death and become a Walker rather than being cut up and served on a barbeque…Not that either idea was exactly appealing to her.

Instead she served her days listening to the screams and crying of other people, to the smell and sound of cooking flesh, to the yelling of instructions and sadistic laughter, all of this whilst stuck in the dark confines of a storage container. There were narrow strips of light on either side of the sliding doors which gave Katelyn a small glimpse into the life outside of the metal box.

This day started much like the rest of them, the sound of the metal bar being pulled away and the door opening to flood the container with light and cause Kate to shuffle to the very end until she felt the cold hard steel against her back, her hands shielding her eyes from the sudden brightness wondering whether it was her turn to be their food supply. There was a dull slap as the meat was tossed carelessly into it before the door was slammed shut and locked once more.

Sliding down the wall, Kate drew her knees up to her chest and rested her head against them. She knew it was pointless screaming at them, demanding answers because they would just do as they did every time they pulled back the door…Ignore her. She could hear the yelling and scrambling from the other containers as those that weren't as lucky as her (if you could say lucky,) were being dragged from the confines to meet their end.

However, the events of the day were very unlike what was standard procedure for those at the Terminus. Time wasn't of major importance when you're stuck in the dark but it wasn't long before an explosion rang out and shook the whole floor. Kate shot to her feet, her pulse suddenly racing as she tried to peer through the thin slats of light between the door and the wall of the container. The air was thick with the scent of petrol, and the atmosphere had become tense as people yelled instructions to one another.

A scream tore through the air and there were heavy footfalls followed by gunshots, by the sound of it something had gone extremely wrong. Katelyn hoped viciously that the Survivors they had captured had found a way to fight back, but even if that was the case, what chance would she have when she was locked away on her own?

The feeling of despair overcame Kate and she began to bang furiously on the wall of the container, "Let me out!" She started to scream, not letting up on the constant stream of banging. "Someone let me out please!"

More gunshots, more footsteps, more screams. Katelyn stopped screaming and banging enough for her to check what was happening outside and when she put her eyes to the slit of the container she screamed and fell backwards as several Walkers shifted passed the container.

Indeed something had gone horribly wrong inside the Terminus to allow the undead to swarm like this.

After regaining a hold of herself and knowing that the Walkers couldn't physically get her whilst she was trapped in the dark container, she continued her vigil in complete silence. It wasn't long before she heard more voices now heading towards where she was situated.

"We have to get them out, they're just like us. Surely we aren't those people yet," She heard someone murmur close by. There was a few more grumbles as someone protested but within a few seconds the metal bar was again pulled back and she leapt aside, more from instinct than from concern; she already knew that those on the other side were not people from the Terminus.

There were at least four shadowy figures outlined by the brightness of the Sun waiting to see who was trapped inside this particular crate. The man at the front was even ready to attack, and Kate shielded herself just in case,

"No please, I'm not one of them; I'm not one of their kind...They killed everyone I was with, they…"

"We don't have time for this right now, we gotta get out of here," The obvious leader interjected turning his back on the girl and scanning the area once more. The way out was now blocked by a seemingly endless supply of Walkers, the smelling of decaying and now burning flesh was ripe in the area but the stench was barely even noticeable with the adrenaline coursing through every single person's veins.

Rick Grimes quickly edged back towards the metal container that they had just opened at the same time that Daryl dragged Glenn back by the front of his shirt to hide him from view to avoid being detected by the swarming dead just as the sound of gunshots rang out extremely close by.

Even though she was still highly reluctant about being in their company, the girl picked up the nearest thing she could get that might be considered a weapon which was a bit of sharp splintered wood. It would be sufficient enough to use against the soft decaying flesh of the Walkers if the occasion called for it. Better than that the other Survivors did not seem to even blink an eyelid at the fact that she now had a weapon, or that she was armed. She doubted they would allow her to stay after they had gotten out of this mess, but for now at least she had some form of allies.

Her eyes followed Rick as he quickly moved away from the storage container and ducked down behind a rusted vehicle, and how Daryl followed closely behind to abruptly stop a Walker from ambushing Rick when his attention was drawn to the gunners.

As the last of the gunners dawdled behind the others, it was evident that Rick had found his opportunity, a weak spot in their formation. He rose quickly and darted towards the solo male and drove the wooden stake into the back of his neck, taking his weapon without another thought. With the AK-47 he had obtained, he aimed and fired at the remaining gunners who had managed to take down a good proportion of the Walkers that had been heading their way.

Katelyn's mouth dropped open at the sheer brutality of this action, but with everything that she had witnessed and with the loss of her friends…Well it was what they deserved after all. She quickly hid her shocked expression and tightened her grip on the wooden stake that she had obtained and she followed the group. It would have been more beneficial for her to grab one of the other guns that had been left behind, but it was too risky not only with the other Walkers that were now flooding into the area but also what the others in the group may think.

Instead she quietly followed Glenn and Bob around the other side of the container, not glad to see the back of it. They moved along the path that the Gunners had appeared from and found themselves pretty much in the open now. A few containers were dotted around the area, and Walkers were rife but it appeared that Rick did not seem to mind. He had his eyes set upon one in particular and the group followed silently on the mission across the courtyard. Finding her chance to maybe secure a spot within their crowd, she used the wooden stake and drove it through the head of the nearest decaying body. Flesh peeled away from the eye socket and splattered her hand and wrist in blood but this act did not make her feel nauseous anymore, it had occurred too much for that kind of reaction.

She simply wrenched the wood out from the eye socket and turned on her heel to continue the attack. Rick had already cleared a path towards the container and was pulling back the metal bar that had kept it securely closed whilst the other three kept the Walkers at bay, and of course Katelyn was doing her best to support his cause. Their leader did seem incredibly unhinged, a crazed look apparent in his eyes but she assumed anybody faced with death and the idea of becoming the Terminus' food supply would do that to someone…

The container was now open and out came the rest of Rick's survivor's, and there was certainly a few of them. Katelyn could not pay too much attention to the happy reunion as they now began to move towards the chain-link fence to escape the area. There was a heavy blanket laid across a portion of the fence, more than likely it had been placed there by those that had already escaped. This was their chance to get out of this place before the whole thing erupted into flames, or the compound became too overrun by the Walkers to be able to control the situation.

Taking his leadership role seriously, Rick turned on his heel and pointed his AK-47 at the nearest Walkers before noticing some of the Terminus survivors up on the roof top. Whilst everyone else clambered over the fence (with additional help from Abraham) Rick took aim at those on the roof now trying to shoot at the escaping survivors. Katelyn didn't have the chance to see whether the bullets hit their target because Abraham had took hold of her arm and was now hoisting her over the fence. She lost her balance and fell to the mossy ground on the other side, but she rolled away to make sure that both Rick and Abraham didn't crush her on their way down.

Scrambling to her feet, Katelyn dusted the dried leaves off her jacket and pants and turned to face the survivor's. Undoubtedly her appearance had caused a few questions to spark up but there had been no time to ask those burning questions…Now that the threat had subsided somewhat and the others were now gradually starting to move through the forest away from the Terminus she was sure that they would be on the tip of their tongues.

Indeed, after around five minutes of walking, Rick stopped dead in his tracks and grabbed the newcomer firmly by the upper arm. A gasp escaped her but she did not try to fight against him, she was expecting this to happen, she knew this would be where she would have to face the world alone. All her friends were dead, the ones she had considered her family. She had travelled with most of them since the outbreak and now she had gone back to square one and had nobody.

"I think we have some time now," Rick started, glaring at her with distrust and relinquishing his grip upon her arm, "What were you doing at the Terminus? Why were you in that container by yourself? Is it a trap? Are you here to spy on us?"

The others turned to listen to the conversation; it was evident that allowing new people into the group was not a common event…Not anymore at least.

"The group I was with, we went there for the same reason as everybody else. We believed that it was a Sanctuary where we could be safe where we didn't have to run anymore where we didn't have to change camp every day to keep the Walkers off our scent. We followed the tracks and the signs that pointed to the Terminus but each night we had to move away because the sight was just too open…We'd already lost a few because we believed we were alone…"

Katelyn shook her head and folded her arms across her chest, she'd not really had time to consider what to say to earn her right to stay with Rick and she knew a sob story probably wasn't the best way.

"It took us a few days to get there; we were determined to get there as soon as we physically could. We were hungry and tired, we just wanted to be able to sleep somewhere without the threat of being attacked whilst we rested, without the need of having to have some guard us as we did so. They welcomed us with open arms at the start, stripped us of our weapons and ammunition and any other supplies we had. We obviously didn't protest against this what with the bullshit they ladled on to us…Probably the same cock and bull they fed you too."

"It wasn't long before they turned and we saw what they really wanted; human flesh…Cannibals. We were ushered into one of those containers, one of us protested and they shot him straight between the eyes, used it as a warning. It was a more merciful way to go I'd say, rather than be cut down like a pig and bled dry."

Rick did not respond at all to this blunt description since he had already witnessed the sheer brutality of those at the Terminus. He inclined his head instead, pushing for her to continue with her story.

"Well you know what comes next, the smoke bombs and tear gas, the extrication of the group. They took them one or two at a time, they killed them and…" Katelyn tried to swallow the lump now forming in her throat, tried to fight the pricking of the tears forming in her eyes. It was so fresh in her mind, hearing their screaming and protesting, seeing their faces for the last time. Her family…

"Gareth said he had special plans for me, that he was waiting for the right occasion," She murmured, lowering her head so that they didn't see her tears. "He'd mock me and throw in what they considered food…The damn flesh of my friends because he knew that I was starving. I didn't touch it; I didn't even go near it…"

"I don't know how long I was in that container for until that explosion, everything just blurred together. I was helpless, in despair and I was scared, terrified even. When you opened up the container I thought my time was up. I had nothing to defend myself from the Walkers, and certainly nothing to help against the guns that the people had…But it wasn't them it was you."

Rick narrowed his eyes and turned to face the remainder of his group who had remained silent during the whole conversation. Daryl and Michonne had walked away and were undoubtedly scouting the area to make sure that nothing had followed them but the rest had stayed to hear her story.

"She doesn't have anybody Rick," Maggie started quietly, flicking from Rick to Katelyn as she spoke, "We can't just leave her here on her own, she's lost everyone."

Maggie was in fact imagining what it would be like if she had been in this girl's situation, losing Hershel had been hard enough, but losing Glenn and all the others? That kind of pain was unbearable, unthinkable.

"And how do I know she isn't just some Terminus spy, reporting back to Gareth and the others, what if it's like last time, at the prison?"

"I despise them as much as you do, I watched all the friends I had journeyed with over the past few years leave me knowing what their fate would be. I would have killed them myself given the chance," Katelyn murmured, her voice now choked with emotion. "I was alone in that container for days, thinking of what they had done and losing my mind…"

"That's enough," Glenn interjected noting how uncomfortable and tense this was getting. They had only just made it out of the Terminus alive and with all their limbs intact and when the explosion had hit, Glenn was the one who was next in line to have his throat slit. "You saw the flesh in the container yourself Rick, and she wasn't even shocked when you gunned them down…It's a well thought out lie just to report back to Gareth Rick,"

Rick did not say anything further; he simply turned away from Katelyn and advanced further into the woods. The others followed with no further questions, and seeing this as a sign that she could remain with them, Katelyn followed suite slowly, hanging back a little further than the rest.

Daryl was waiting for them close by, standing beside a tree which held a marking of a cross within a circle with a shovel in his hand and he didn't look the slightest bit surprised that the new girl was still with them. Michonne had circled back around to meet them; it seemed that they were still in the clear and that the Walkers were still distracted by the explosion at the Terminal.

"We get our supplies and we go back," Rick started as he knelt down on the ground and began to shovel away dirt, "They don't get to live,"

He reached the bag that he had hidden in the woods and unzipped it taking the magnum on top and taking it himself.

"We only just got out of there," Glenn protested looking at Rick with disbelief, "We need to get out of here not go back,"

"The place is on fire and it's swarming with Walkers…They either run or die." Maggie continued looking highly disturbed by the prospect of having to go back into the Terminus.

"They don't get to live." Rick repeated simply, dishing out the weapons and getting back to his feet.

Glenn was about to protest again when the atmosphere changed once again and everybody's eyes went from Rick to what was standing behind him. Or more to who was standing behind him.

There were absolutely no words spoken as Daryl was the first to see her and the first to approach, wrapping his arms around the women now standing in front of them all. Katelyn held back even further as she examined the faces of the others. Surprise, happiness, relief, joy…This was obviously someone they knew and had likely lost due to one reason or another.

"Did you do this?" Rick asked in awe, watching Carol's face slowly soften and tears brim her eyes. They too embraced but it wasn't over just yet.

"I have to show you something…"

And their journey continued through the dense forest.

Katelyn lowered her head and followed obediently in silence, the wooden stake still held tightly in her left hand. She did not expect to receive any other kind of weapon, and especially not a gun so this would suffice for now. She also didn't expect someone to start speaking to her considering the air of mistrust that surrounded her,

"Don't worry about Rick; he has his reasons to be concerned."

Glancing sideways she saw that Sasha had trailed behind somewhat to make a conversation, "A lot of stuff has happened over the past few months and it's…Well it's affected him. He'll probably warm up to you eventually; he did with me and Tyreese. I'm Sasha by the way,"

Sasha extended her hand and Katelyn took it tentatively and gave it a quick shake,

"I'm Katelyn." She responded, finding it highly unlikely that Rick would be able to accept her into their group not when she would remind him constantly of what had occurred at the Terminus.

"How long were you there?" Katelyn asked quietly, shifting her gaze from Sasha to the rest of the group who were scattered at random distances to keep an eye on the vicinity. They had definitely been surviving in the wild for some time, they knew exactly how to act and protect themselves that was for sure. "At the Terminus I mean," Katelyn continued looking back at Sasha.

"Not long, they took us all for fools and they made us walk into that container single file. It was that or be shot down and we knew we could survive this, how could we not when we had Rick?" She laughed lightly, although Kate could tell it wasn't quite genuine. The whole situation was far too fresh for anyone to laugh about it. "Although it wasn't quite Rick who made the most lasting impression, let's just say we have some powerful friends…That's Carol. Been with Rick longer than me and Tyreese, she left when we were back at the Prison and luckily…Well luckily she turned back up just in the nick of the time. I'm sure we all owe our lives to her,"

"I know I do," Kate murmured, "And I guess I will owe Rick too. It's his decision that's probably kept me alive now."

"It'll be alright, we're all together now and we have the whole country at our disposal…Although I think we're going to be heading in one specific location…" Sasha trailed off and looked off into the distance and started to slow down whilst Kate carried on walking with her head down, not really noticing anything in particular, it was only when Sasha didn't continue talking that she questioned her,

"Where's that?" She asked, turning her head to her side and noticing that she had been walking alone for several seconds. She too stopped and looked ahead to see another set of figures heading towards them. The first was a broad hulk of a man and it could only be the Tyreese that Sasha had been speaking of, the resemblance was uncanny and Sasha's reaction to his appearance only confirmed the matter.

The second figure was a child, a baby even and Rick and the other kid who had been silent through-out the entire journey swarmed her instantly. It appeared that both of the children would be Rick's, that much was evident…The reunion of all their former group seemed to only spur them on, their spirits now raised and the Terminus temporarily forgotten, Rick did not mention another word about going back to that Hell and instead took his daughter from Tyreese and continued onwards. The further they were from the Terminus, the better.

Kate looked at her surroundings and breathed in the fresh air, admiring the golden sunlight that filtered through the falling leaves, and listening to sounds of birdsong and to the friendly banter of friends…After all, it was only probably thirty minutes ago that she had been enclosed in her steel casket believing that each day that passed would be her last, her eyes staring into darkness and the smell of burning flesh constantly offended her nose…But now she was free.

Now she had become a part of something better, and for the first time in what seemed like weeks, a small smile crossed her lips.