Everyone has a breaking point, even the strongest of people do. Lloyd wasn't an exception. Now, Lloyd was one of the nicest, most empathetic and warm hearted people you could meet, but as time went on, and with everything that happened, it started to get to him.
For years he'd been locking everything out, "forgetting" it and build up the emotions inside until it all became too much and he eventually broke down (most preferably alone) was kinda his strategy.
When you're the green ninja you can't just loose it, no matter what happens, no matter how you feel, you have to keep it cool, and for a long while Lloyd did exactly that. He became pretty good at it, actually. Maybe even too good, because after a little while, he kinda lost the feel for how he felt. He became so good at swallowing and hiding his emotions that he even did it to himself, but who cares right? In fact, it was probably a good thing, wasn't it? He thought so. But then it really got to him, like really.
Lloyd was used to nightmares, he'd had them his whole life, but with time they got worse and worse, the traumas fighting over which one should get to appear in the next one.
There wasn't a single night he didn't wake up in a cold sweat, heart beating as if it'd jump out of his chest, his breathing fast and uneven, the panic running through his body. And it wasn't just the nightmares, everything just got out of control, he could no longer control his feelings, and with that went his control over his powers as well, which on more than one occasion almost had fatal consequences for him and the other Ninjas, and it got to a point where he just couldn't make himself use them anymore, because what of he hurt his friends? He'd never be able to forgive himself.
Everything just came crashing down on him, and it was just too much. Every night he heard the ghost from the past in his dreams, every night they came back to haunt him and they followed him through the day, screaming in his head, how they were coming for him, how this was his fault, how he ruined them. And then, finally, one day, Lloyd just snapped.
They were on a mission and things were starting to get out of hand, the enemy had them backed up and a corner, Lloyd felt trapped and before he knew it, his powers just lashed out. He had no control. And then, everything he'd ever had was gone, just like that. And it was all his fault.
His friends were- gone.
Lloyd fell to the floor, realising what he'd just done. His body was shaking as he frantically tried to convince himself that no, no! His friends weren't gone, this couldn't be real. This wasn't real! But it was, and it was all his fault.
He pressed his hands against his face, while hot tears streamed down, he pressed as hard as he could, not really for any reason. He just wanted to feel hurt some way other than this. Then the exhaustion, guilt, sorrow and anger got to him, and he just fell unconscious.
As said, everyone has a breaking point, even the strongest can break. Lloyd had finally reached his. At the loss of his friends, something inside Lloyd just broke.
As he laid on the floor, he felt the empty void grow inside him, and it grew and grew, until something started to grow in it. Burning anger, desperate hatred. Lloyd wanted revenge, justice! And right now, there was nothing he wouldn't do to get it.