Title: Amour de Ma Vie

Author: x-SortaKinda

Disclaimer:I do not own CSI: Miami. If I did, Horatio and Calleigh would be an item by now(:

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Calleigh tapped her fingers on the edge of her desk in her ballistics lab as she stared blankly down at the report in front of her. She tried to focus on her work in front of her but it was becoming incredibly hard to do so. She turned her head slightly to the hallway, hoping that anything out there was boring enough to make her want to complete her report. But, of course, there was something out to get her; Horatio Caine happened to be passing by at that exact moment. He glanced into her lab, but didn't even make eye contact before turning away again to smile at Natalia as she handed him a file and then walked away.

Well, damn you, Horatio, she thought bitterly. She hadn't talked to him in almost a year. She didn't consider their work-related, 10-second phone calls. Those meant absolutely nothing to her. She wished she could talk to him, like they used to. Like when they would just sit around in his office, either eating dinner or lunch, even drinking coffee, and laughing about random things and the guys. Now, it was as if the other didn't even exist anymore. Well, for him anyway. She sighed as she brought her face into her hands. She then ran her hands through her long, straightened, blonde hair and set them back onto her table. Calleigh picked up her pen and started to slowly write down the findings and evidence she had collected down onto the paper.

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Calleigh signed her name at the bottom of her report before she closed the file and recapped her pen. She dropped the pen onto her desk before she picked up the light brown file in her hand and heading out of her lab. She took a deep breath as she stopped in the middle of the hallway, almost running right smack into Tara Price.

"Oh! Sorry!" Tara quickly apologized to the senior CSI and held up both her hands in an apologetic gesture. She dropped them once Calleigh smiled at her and told her it was fine.

"Were you going up to Horatio's office?" Calleigh asked quietly. She was too tired to go up and hand it to him herself. Plus, she wasn't all that ready to put up with him either ignoring her or just taking the file silently.

"Yeah. Why?"

"Well," Calleigh started to play with the end of her suit jacket's sleeve, "I was hoping you could do me a favor and take this up to him?" She knew she was being childish by not taking it up to him herself, but she was sure that she would explode and start lashing him out for all the crap he had done the past few months. It wouldn't be all too good to get fired for going off on your boss.

Tara nodded as she looked at the file then back up at the blonde with a friendly smile. "Sure."

"Thank you so much, Tara. You're amazing." Calleigh smiled as Tara laughed, and she turned and headed towards the locker room to gather her things and go home. As she entered the locker room, she gave a small smile to Ryan who was leaving.

"Hey, Cal. Me, Eric, Natalia and Frank are heading out to grab a drink. Wanna come?" He invited as he followed Calleigh to her locker.

"Um... Can I take a raincheck? I'm not feeling too good and I just want to go home and sleep." She wasn't really lying she just moved around the meaning slightly. She wasn't feeling well; emotionally and mentally. At all. Sleep would make her forget about the turn of events in her life, at least for a couple of hours. And God knew she needed to get some rest.

Ryan watched Calleigh's face, worried for his friend before nodding his head and turning around to head out. "Hope you feel better, Cal. See you Monday."

"Thanks, Ryan. See you then." She said as she finally got the right combination dialed into her lock and pulled open her locker door. She grabbed her purse before slamming it shut and heading back out of the locker room. She was passing by DNA when she heard Horatio call her name from behind her. She closed her eyes and took in a small breath before she reopened them and turned around.

"Yes?" She asked quietly as she looked up into his dulled blue eyes, and she somehow knew that she was the cause of it.

"You left out a page." Horatio said simply as he held up the file that she had given Tara earlier.

"Oh. Um, I'll go get it. Sorry." She mumbled as she headed back towards her lab. She sighed as she realized that he was following her. Who in the hell could really hate her so much as to make her go through this? She picked up her pace slightly, not wanting to make Horatio think she wanted to badly leave and get away from him, though that was exactly right. She pushed back the glass door to Ballistics and saw the single paper lying beside the pen she had abandoned earlier. She snatched it up and handed it to him with an apologetic look before heading out.

"Calleigh, what is your problem?" He called after her just as the door swished shut. She froze just outside of it and turned to face him, an incredulous look plastered onto her face. What was her problem? What was his?!

She furiously pushed open the door to her lab, and stomped her way back to stand in front of him. "What is my problem? I wouldn't know what the hell you were talking about, because, frankly, I'm the only one that has been making an effort to bring our friendship back! You're the one that won't even look at me, the one that stares right past me as if I'm empty space! So, you wanna know what my problem is?! It's you." She forcefully poked her finger into Horatio's chest as she turned and fled from the only man that could ever hurt her as much as he had. She quickly rushed her way through the lab's halls and was thankful when she reached the side exit that led into the parking garage. She threw open the doors and slowed her pace down until she had made it into her car. She slammed the door shut beside her and locked the doors before letting her head fall forward against the steering wheel and cried. She cried until she was sure that her tears had fully washed away any trace of her make-up.

She wiped at her face as best she could and grabbed her keys before starting the engine and pulling out of the garage. She wanted to get home. She needed to get home.

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Calleigh pushed open the door to her condo and stepped through, quietly shutting and locking the door behind her. She dropped her purse onto her couch and shrugged off her jacket as well. She pulled her hair back into a messy bun, kicked off her heels and started undoing the buttons to her vest before she slipped it off and tossed it in the same direction as her suit jacket. She sighed quietly as she pulled off her gun, badge and ID and moved towards her bedroom. She placed the items in her bedside table drawer and untucked her blouse before pulling the sheets to her bed back and crawling in. She was exhausted.

Just before she was about to fall asleep, her phone started ringing. Just her luck. She groggily sat up and pushed the covers off of her and stumbled back into her living room. She grabbed her jacket as she fell into the corner of her sofa and pulled her phone out of the pocket. She sighed in devastation as she read the caller ID. H. Caine.

Why? Why? Why?

She decided to answer it. She would simply hang up if he was calling to yell at her.

"Duq - " Her voice sounded raspy and she cleared her throat before trying it again. "Duquesne."

"Calleigh..." She sat up as straight as she possibly could at the weak and broken voice at the other end. "Can we please talk?"

"Horatio; I don't know if I can do this right now. I - I just can't."

"Please...please." He begged.

Calleigh took in a deep, long breath before exhaling inaudibly. "Okay. I'll be over in a few minutes." She answered before she hung up. She stood up and slipped her jacket back on. She pulled the hair tie out of her hair and ran her fingers through the long strands, trying to get as many tangles out as she could. She grabbed her purse and keys and headed out the door.

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As Calleigh pulled up outside of Horatio's house, she started freaking. Was she going to be able to do this? Or would this just end up badly like at the lab. Horatio's voice had made her want to run and comfort him, and her heart had screamed for her to do just that. But her mind had told her to stay away. Should she have listened to her head? Possibly. But she was so in love with Horatio that it hurt that she nothing to him anymore; and she desperately wanted to fix that. It was the worst possible feeling ever. She hadn't been this broken when her parents divorced, when Speed died, when Alexx left, even when Jake left. But with Horatio, it was like her whole world had come crashing down.

She turned her car off in the end, and silently gathered her things before exiting her vehicle and making her way up the walkway to his front door. She knocked and he answered in a heartbeat. He opened the door wide enough for her to be able to get in. Calleigh didn't know what to do next so she just walked over to his sofa and took a seat into one of the corners, setting her keys inside her purse and placing it in her lap. She pushed her hair back nervously as he took his seat across from her in another chair and looked at her with sad eyes.

"Calleigh, we need to talk about everything that's been happening. Most importantly what's been going on with us." He whispered the last sentence as his deep blue eyes met her green ones. She simply nodded, not knowing if she could speak. "I know that I've been distant lately, that I've given up hope on everything. Especially you and the team. I've done stupid things in the past but nothing compares to what I've recently done. I should have told you about these things. I should have wanted to. But I didn't, just because I knew that it would upset you, and make you angry with me. I guess, by trying to protect you, I made things worse."

Calleigh listened closely to his explanation and looked away from him, tears threatening to spill. Don't you dare cry, she told herself angrily. But not even her own threat could stop her. The tears cascaded their way down her cheeks and she moved her hand to wipe them away. "That's it? That's all? No apology or...anything?" She asked quietly.

"I'm not finished, Cal. I'm just giving you time to process that." He took a deep breath and looked back into her pain filled eyes. "I hate seeing you like this. I hate seeing you hurt and I hate knowing that I'm the one that's causing you all of this. You have no idea how much I hate myself for it. But you have to know that I never meant to hurt you. I adore you more than anything on this earth. I love you more than anything in my life, I would give my life for you. You have absolutely no idea just how much, Cal." He whispered as he as he rested his elbows on his knees and dropped his head into his hands.

Calleigh froze across from him, taking in quick, short breaths. Her chest felt like it would explode. She looked frantically at Horatio as she dropped from the sofa and onto her knees before she closed the short space between them and gripped his hands before trying to pull them away from his face. She managed to pry them away but he wouldn't look up at her. She let a small sob escape as she slumped down, her legs folded underneath her. It managed to get Horatio's attention. He looked back at Calleigh as her tears made free falls from her bright emeralds. She again pushed herself forward now. She stared into his eyes for a moment before she managed to slowly close the gap between them, letting her lips fall against his.

He placed one hand on the back of her head while the other gripped a handful of her blonde locks. He deepened the kiss quickly, needing her close, he gently pulled her up until she was fully on his lap, straddling him. She threw her arms around his neck and continued to move her lips against his. She needed to know that he really meant what he had said. She had been hurt too much in the past with false 'I love you's. She loved Horatio too much to ever feel regret for having loved him if he were another one of those cases.

Horatio pulled back far too quickly for her liking, but they both needed air. "I'm sorry. So sorry. I do really love you. So much. Please, please find it in your heart to forgive me. I - I can't loose you. Not you, Cal."

She realized for the very first time in her life what love really meant. It was forgiveness, trust and being able to love a person and only that person with everything you had. "You've already been forgiven." She whispered as she pressed her lips back against his and moved her hands forward; one onto his chest, one gripping onto the collar of his shirt. She pulled back slightly again and mumbled against his lips, "I love you too."

Horatio gently pushed Calleigh back until she was standing in front of him and he stood as well before he wrapped his arms around her waist and returned his lips to hers. He moved his right hand up into her hair and pushed it back before tucking it behind her ear. As Calleigh started fumbling with the buttons on his shirt, he realized that they were getting far too carried away. He gently pushed her back and shook his head reluctantly.

"No, please, no. I need you; I need to be with you." She frantically explained and looked up into his lust darkened eyes. "Please."

"Cal..."

"Please, Horatio."

"I don't want you to regret this in the morning." He whispered as he pressed a kiss to her cheek.

"Never." She breathed, regaining eye contact.

Horatio dipped his head back down, capturing her lips once again, and picked Calleigh up into his arms. He carefully carried her towards his bedroom. Once in it, he shut the door behind them and placed her gently into the middle of his bed. He carefully crawled on top of her and slipped his hands underneath her jacket, pushing it back. She sat up slightly, allowing him to slip it all the way off and start on her shirt.

"Are you sure you want this?" He asked, breathless.

Calleigh nodded as her fingers stilled on the last buttons of his shirt. "I'm absolutely positive, Handsome. I've never wanted anything more than I do now."

With that he continued on the buttons of her shirt and she on his. "I love you," he breathed out.

"I love you so much." She replied.

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R&R! :D