Title: Playing House
Author: xNomii
Summary: JSP/ASP – They had always cared for each other, it just took them a while to figure out they both cared a little too much. All dialogue. Slash.
Rating: M (barely)
Pairing: James Sirius Potter/Albus Severus Potter, hints of Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy/Albus Severus Potter
Contains: Slash, incest, only dialogue, bad language and swearing, suggestive material
Beta: The mindblowing and excruciatingly sexy Dark-Night-Sky
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and no money is being made with this.

Playing House

"Why do I always have to be the mother Jamie, why can't you be the mother once."

"I'm older Al, therefor I have to be the father. Look at mum and dad, and uncle Bill and aunt Fleur and Grandma and Grandpa. The father is always older, and I'm older than you, so I have to be the father."

"But,-"

"No buts Al, if you want to play, you have to be the mother."

"Why do we always have to play this game Jamie, can we not just play with the gobstones? Or exploding snap?"

"You know Lily won't let us, it's her turn to pick what we're doing today. And she always pick this. Be glad she's not making you wear a dress again."

"Okay."

"Don't look so sulky Al, it'll be fun!"

"If you say so.."

~o~

"Why did you do that?"

"It's what mum does when dad comes home.."

"You can't do that Al!"

"But you said I had to be the mother and mum always pecks dad on his lips when he gets home!"

"You can't peck me, it's wrong! Are you mad?"

"I'm sorry.."

"Just don't do it again."

"Al! I told you, you couldn't do it again!"

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to, I swear. I wasn't paying attention. I just thought.."

"You thought what?"

"I thought it didn't really matter!"

"Of course it matters! Why would you think it didn't matter? It's fucking wrong!"

"Oh! I'm going to tell mum you said a bad word!"

"Shut up Lily, this is a grown up matter and you wanted to be the child, go back to playing with your dolls, will you?"

"Why is it so wrong?"

"We're both guys Al! Guys don't peck each other, if they do, they become fairies! Do you wanna become a poofter Al?"

"No!"

"Then cut the crap and don't do it again!"

"James said a bad word again!"

"Dolls, Lily!"

"James are you awake?"

"Mpfhhh."

"James!"

"No I'm not, I'm sleeping, shut up!"

"James!"

"Al why are you even in my room!"

"..I can't sleep."

"So you decided to wake me too? Thanks a fucking lot."

"James I'm cold!"

"Then go back to bed."

"But James!"

"Do we really need to have this conversation now?"

"What if I do get sorted into Slytherin James?"

"Al..."

"I don't want to get sorted into Slytherin."

"You won't get sorted into Slytherin Al."

"But what if I do?"

"Then you'll at least look better, red really isn't your colour you know."

"I'm scared James."

"There's no need to be scared."

"Will you hold me? Like dad holds mum when someone mentions uncle Fred?"

"Will it make you feel better?"

"Yes, please Jamie?"

"Okay then."

"I won't! I won't be in Slytherin!"

"James, give it a rest!"

"I only said he might be! There's nothing wrong with that. He might be in Slyth-."

"Shut up James."

"I told you you wouldn't be in Slytherin."

"You...what? You were the one that said I might be in Slytherin!"

"Oh Al, you're such a moron. I was just trying to be supportive, you know. I never thought you had it in you what was needed to be a Snake, you're way too innocent."

"..Thanks?"

"No problem mate, red's still not your colour though. Guess I'll always be the better looking brother."

"Prick."

"Will she be okay?"

"I'm sure she'll be fine."

"How do you know that?"

"It's mum Al, you seriously think she'll let a piece of scum knock her off her feet?"

"I suppose not."

"I'm sure of it. She'll be okay before you know it. Now stop pacing, and go to bed, it's late you know."

"You're still awake."

"I'm older than you pillock, I'm allowed to be awake."

"I don't wanna go to bed alone Jamie."

"You won't be alone Al, you have roommates."

"I want to sleep with you."

"Al..."

"Please? It'll make me feel better."

"I suppose it's okay then."

"Al you're suffocating me!"

"Shut up 'm sleepy."

"Al you have to move!"

"Dun wanna move, just wanna stay right here."

"Looking forward to go back to Hogwarts Jamie?"

"Course I am, I'll be a bloody fourth year! And you won't be an ickle firstie anymore! Well, in my head you'll always stay one though."

"Sometimes I wonder why I like you."

"Love you too Al."

"Your first Quidditch Game and you just had to be the hero, didn't you?"

"But we won James! I caught the Snitch!"

"You also broke your arm while doing so prat."

"But we won!"

"That we did."

"You'll have to do everything I tell you to know, Al, since I'm a Prefect."

"That's a lie!"

"No it isn't, now massage my neck."

"No!"

"I'll dock house points."

"I'm in the same House as you, you moron, do you want Gryffindor to lose the cup?"

"Then I'll give you a detention! Now come over here and massage my neck, you know you want to."

"You won't give me a detention."

"Wanna bet?"

"Wipe that grin off your face or I'll do it for you."

"Never thought you were such a kinky bugger, little brother."

"Oh go to hell."

"You hurt my feeble heart."

"Fuck off."

"What did you think Al? One time in the hospital wing isn't enough, I need to go again?"

"It hurts so bad."

"That's cause you're a bloody moron. Wait until mum hears about this, she'll throw a fit."

"You can't tell her!"

"Al, you broke your leg and got yourself a concussion, I didn't need to tell her, the Headmistress did."

"You should've stopped her then!"

"Stopped McGonagall? Are you sure that concussion of yours hasn't permanently messed up your brain? Or you know, messed it up further than it already was."

"You're of no help."

"You're just angry that I'm more skilled on a broom than you are. I actually manage to stay on it during the match."

"I caught us the snitch, didn't I?"

"You broke your leg while doing so."

"We won, shut up."

"What were you doing with Malfoy earlier?"

"We got paired up for Potions this year."

"You'll be stuck with him for the rest of fourth year?"

"I guess so."

"Oh, poor you."

"Mhmm."

"Is it true?"

"Bloody hell James, you scared the living shit out of me. Don't you know you're not supposed to sneak up on people like that?"

"Is it true?"

"Is what true?"

"What they're saying. That you snogged Malfoy. Is it true?"

"Wha-..Who told you that?"

"So it is true."

"I- I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you myself.."

"How could you Al? He's Malfoy! He's a guy!"

"James stop that, let me go! You're scaring me."

"I thought you were my brother, I guess you're just a bloody queer. I should have known it all along."

"I- I thought you wouldn't care.."

"Of course I care, you faggot! My brother is a bloody cock sucker, what are people going to think of us now?"

"You don't mean that."

"I mean every single word."

"Al.."

"Go away James. I don't want to talk to you."

"But Al!"

"Go away."

"I'm so-"

"I don't want to hear it."

"But I am!"

"You're too bloody late James. You should have realized you were sorry before you said it. Now fuck off!"

"Are you okay?"

"Wha- what happened?"

"You fell off your broom during practice while trying to save me from a bludger. It hit you in the stomach and you lost balance and fell."

"I'm sorry Al. I really didn't mean what I said before. It just caught me off guard, I don't care what others think. Can you please forgive me?"

"I forgive you. I forgave you two days ago. Lucy told me you stood up for me when a Group of Slytherins were making fun of me. She said that she'd never seen something more hilarious than the sight of them when you finished."

"They were calling you unnatural."

"You don't think I'm unnatural then?"

"Of course I don't!"

"You don't care I like guys then?"

"No, I don't. Well, I'll have to get used to it you know. But I don't mind. I still don't like Malfoy though."

"I don't either."

"What?"

"At least, not the way you think I like him. He was just helping me out."

"So you don't like Malfoy?"

"No."

"And you're not dating him?"

"No."

"And you'll never date him?"

"Merlin James, what is this, an interrogation? No, I'll most likely never date Scorpius."

"Oh thank Merlin, I thought I lost you!"

"You're such a wanker James."

"A bloody gorgeous wanker."

"Prat."

"Still a gorgeous one!"

"Head Boy James Sirius Potter. Don't you just love the sound of that Al? Isn't it brilliant?"

"It sounds exactly the same as the first time you told me James. And the second, third and fourth time. Though I think somewhere between the seventeenth and twenty-first time you sounded different 'cause you were eating while you said it."

"Oh shut up Alley Cat, or I'll give you a detention."

"Mhmmbloodyarse."

"What was that?"

"Nothing, Mister Head Boy James Sirius Potter."

"It sounds even better when you say it."

"Why do you never go on dates Al?"

"What?"

"You never date. Since Malfoy last year I've never seen you with anyone. Why?"

"No reason."

"You're a crap liar Al."

"Am not!"

"Are too, little brother. Now tell me the real reason."

"The bo-person I like, uhm, well, he's not..He's straight."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Are you sure? May-."

"I'm sure James, he's completely straight. And even if he wasn't straight, he wouldn't like me, so now I just need to get over him."

"Who is it?"

"I'm not telling you. Not even if you beg."

"Meh, you're so boring Al. But that's not true, everyone likes you. They'd be a fool if they didn't like you."

"Thanks."

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry they're straight. Even if, you know, it isn't my fault."

"Oh if you only knew."

"What?"

"Nothing. Care for a game of chess?"

"Sure, you'll never win though."

"We'll see about that."

"Albusss!"

"James? Are you drunk?"

"Drunk? Me? Course not silly!"

"James, you reek of alcohol."

"Well maybe I fell into a glass of firewhiskey? You wouldn't know!"

"Except for the fact that a glass is way too small for you to fall in, you're absolutely right. I wouldn't know. Come on, let me help you to your dorms before someone sees you like this. You're Head Boy you know."

"Your hair's so messy Al. Do you not brush it?"

"Of course I brush it!"

"It doesn't look like you do-ho!"

"Oh shut up."

"It's still very soft. Soft hair. Messy soft hair. Pretty soft hair."

"James you're blabbering nonsense. Work with me here if you want to get up. You're bloody heavy!"

"Are you calling me fat?"

"No no no!"

"How could you Al! How could you be so mean!"

"I wasn't calling you fat James! I meant that you were, uhm, muscular! Yeah, muscular. Muscles weigh a lot, that's it."

"Oh, I guess you're right then. I am very muscular after all."

"Of course you are."

"What are you laughing about?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing isn't funny."

"It is. It's hilarious."

"You're so strange Al."

"Yes, I'm strange. And you're normal."

"I'm so glad we came to the same conclusion so quickly!"

"Now get off the couch."

"I dun wanna."

"Come on James, get up!"

"Why don't you get down instead!"

"Wha- aah!"

"You're on top of me."

"I hate you."

"No you don't, you love me."

"I hate you."

"Liar liar pants on fire."

"Let me up!"

"No, I have to tell you a story."

"What?"

"A story, now shoosh."

"Mphhf."

"I've always known."

"Known what?"

"Shut up Al and let me tell the story!"

"Sorry."

"Okay, where was I.. Oh! I've always known you were, you know, gay. Since we were little. I never wanted to admit it, I secretly hoped it would go away and you would never notice. But it didn't. And I don't mind as much as I thought I would. I just don't like the idea of you dating someone. I don't care what gender they are."

"Ho- how did you know?"

"You used to kiss me, when we were younger. Do you remember? You were quite small. You never realized why you couldn't, you just didn't do it anymore because I told you it was wrong."

"I remember."

"You do?"

"I do."

"Want to know a secret?"

"Sure?"

"I never thought it was wrong."

"What?"

"You kissing me. I never thought it was wrong."

"You're drunk James, let me get you to bed."

"It wasn't wrong."

"Come on James, you don't know what you're saying. If you don't get up now, I'll leave you on the couch."

"No!"

"Then get up and come with me."

"You're such a whiner."

"Wake up!"

"Go away or I swear I'll suffocate you with this pillow."

"James, we have to go home for Christmas vacation. Me and Lily have been waiting for you for over ten minutes!"

"My head hurts, I'll stay here."

"Then you shouldn't have gotten so pissed last night, dickhead."

"Go away!"

"No."

"Al, let go of those blankets. I swear if you pull them away, you are going to die."

"I'd like to see you try."

"You insufferable prat!"

"Ah! James! You're naked!"

"You're pulled away my blankets!"

"You're naked! Get off me!"

"What? Is my nakedness turning you on?"

"Get off me James."

"Too much for you to handle?"

"Get off me James."

"Merlin Al, no need to get your knickers in a twist."

"Lily and I will be waiting downstairs. Hurry."

"Okay okay, mum, I'll hu-oh."

"Bye James."

"Please, oh please."

"Mhmm."

"Fa-faster, please Ja- nga."

"Mhmm."

"Oh, oh, oh."

"Mhmmwha?"

"James!"

"Al?"

"You're awake?"

"Why were you calling my name?"

"Uhm, no reason. I thought you were gone, but you're clearly still there. Go back to sleep."

"Mhmm."

"Why are you avoiding me?"

"I'm avoiding you?"

"Yes you are!"

"What gave you the idea?"

"We've been back at Hogwarts for two weeks and I only see you during dinner. When you sit on the other side of the table, refusing to meet my eyes."

"I don't do that. You're going mental."

"Yes you do!"

"No I don't!"

"Yes you do!"

"No I don't!"

"Yes you do!"

"No I don't!"

"You do Al and you know it! You're a terrible liar and I can see it. When you lie you blink way too often, your cheeks colour and you fidget with your wand just like you're doing right now!"

"I'm not avoiding you!"

"You are! And you're going to tell me why!"

"But I'm not avoiding you!"

"Damnit Al, drop the innocent act and admit why you are avoiding me!"

"No! Because I'm not avoiding you!"

"Then look me in the eye Al! And stop fiddling with your wand! And most of all, stop lying! We used to be so close Al, what changed?"

"What changed is that every time I look you in the eye I'm overcome with the desire to grab your face and kiss you until the bloody world stops spinning! But I can't because you're straight and my brother and it's wrong!"

"Al wait!"

"No! Leave me alone!"

"Al! Wait up!"

"Sorry, can't! Have class!"

"But Al!"

"Don't wanna be late, talk to you later James!"

"Yeah. Later."

"Al?"

"Oh I'm sorry James, I really can't talk now. I'm meeting up with Rose to work on Transfiguration. You know she hates tardiness!"

"But Al-.

"I'm sorry, I'll see you later, yeah? Bye!"

"Later has already passed."

"Al!"

"Oh James, I'm sorry. I just saw Liam walk out the hallway, I really need to ask him something. We'll talk later!"

"Later again, then."

"Albus!"

"I really need to-."

"No. You're going to stand right here in this deserted hall way where no one could be waiting for you or suddenly need you, and I checked with Rose to ask if you had any classes or plans and she said no, so you're not going anywhere."

"But I-."

"Bloody hell Al! Can't you just take the hint and let me tell you to shut the fuck up and listen to what I have to say! You can't fucking expect me not to want to talk to you after you told me what you told me!"

"I'm sorry.."

"I bet you are! And if you would just have listened to me one fucking minute then I would have been able to tell you that you have no need to avoid me because I have been feeling the exact same way since I found out you kissed Scorpius sodding Malfoy!"

"I fully expect you to be angry with me and tell me it's unnatural a- wait, what did you say?"

"I said that I fancy my own brother."

"Oh. You do?"

"I do yes. It's slightly strange. And worrisome. But I can't help it, and I'm quite sure that you can't either. I am irresistible after all."

"You're such a twat."

"Can't deny the truth."

"You're being serious then?"

"Completely."

"You're not disgusted?"

"Clearly not."

"Can I- Can I kiss you now then?"

"Absolutely."

"Jamie?"

"Al?"

"Am I crushing you?"

"No."

"Do you want me to go back to my own bed?"

"I'd like to see you try and leave."

"You're warm."

"I'm hot."

"Idiot."

"Night Al."

"Night Jamie."

"What if people find out?"

"They won't find out."

"James they're due to find out sometime! What if they want to separate us?"

"I won't let them take you away from me Al, I swear."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

"I love you James."

"I love you too Alley cat."

The end! I hope you enjoyed, reviews are lovely!