Disclaimer: "Runaround Sue" belongs to Dion. I left off writing any of the heh hehs. PPC stands for Protectors of the Plot Continuum. Their website can be found at oddlots.digitalspace.net/ PPC/ (take out the spaces). PPC used with the permission of Jay.
Song Parody to "Runaround Sue" by Dion
Original lyrics found at www.oracleband.net / Lyrics / runaround_sue.htm (take out the spaces)
Bad Mary Sue
Here's my story, sad but true,
It's about a girl known as Mary Sue.
It's suspected Morgoth gave her birth
To torture every guy in Middle-Earth.
Strange violet eyes and silver hair,
Guys fall in love with her skin so fair.
Listen canon characters, I'm telling you
To keep away from the bad Mary Sue.
She battles Orcs in a fancy gown,
Joins the Fellowship, keeps Gimli down.
She has a tragic past, magic jewelry, too,
That evil wench known as a Mary Sue.
Ohhhh, keep away from that girl,
She's a fangirl, true blue, keep away from Sue.
Someone finds the Sue and calls the PPC,
A group that's for canon purity.
Jay and Acy show up in disguise,
Kill the Sue and save the guys.
Here's the moral of the story from the people who know,
If you're a Tolkien fan, then Sue's your foe.
If you don't want the PPC after you,
Never write a bad Mary Sue.