Ezio was sulking. Not that he would ever admit he was sulking, of course. For one, that would involve admitting having emotions which Real Men do not have. Secondly, it would involve admitting he had a reason to sulk. Which, of course, he didn't. The fact that he was (wasn't) sulking had absolutely nothing to do jealousy, either. Just because Leonardo was talking happily with Antonio and Rosa didn't mean he was jealous.

Though talking may not be the correct term. Though he did not seem to be sleepy, he seemed to be at least half leaning on Antonio. It never occurred to Ezio that this may be because he was too drunk to sit up straight of his on volition. Nor did it occur to him that Leonardo would happily cling to anyone in this state, even a complete stranger. No, Ezio was too busy thinking of malicious things to call Antonio. The Asshole Antonio. Annoying Antonio. Atrocious Antonio. Apparently, he had been muttering them under his breath, because Rosa had dissolved into a fit of giggles after looking at him. At least, he hoped it was because of what he was saying, and not because Leonardo had painted something on his face while he slept. He downright snarled when Leonardo laughed at one of Antonio's terrible jokes. As if a story about a thief, a nun and a merchant going into a brothel wasn't the slightest bit funny.

Well. Maybe it was a little funny. But that certainly didn't warrant Leonardo's fit of laughter. Why didn't Leonardo ever laugh at his jokes like that? He hiccuped. Great. Just great. It wasn't even a quiet, sad hiccup reflecting his woes about how much attention Antonio was receiving. No. It was a loud hiccup. Loud enough to attract the attention of everyone in the room. Both Rosa and Leonardo started giggling, while Antonio merely smirked. Ezio tried to look offended, but the overall effect was ruined by a second particularly loud hiccup.

"I'm not drunk," he insisted. Antonio, who was the most sober of them, simply shook his head.

"Of course you aren't, Ezio."

"I'm not," he repeated firmly. To prove it, he stood up, intending to walk in a straight line over to Antonio. Only it didn't really work, and somehow he ended up on top of Leonardo. He wasn't quite sure, but he thought it had something to do with the fact that the room refused to stay still. He tried to roll off Leonardo to get his own seat, but only succeeded in rolling over so he was lying on his back. This was because Leonardo was gripping him quite tightly, hugging him as though he were a teddy bear. A development which Ezio's drunken mind found supremely satisfying. That didn't stop him from sulking, however. Because if he did, he'd have to admit he'd been sulking in the first place. Rosa took one look at them and started making kissy-faces at them.

"Aw, so cute," she cooed. Ezio scowled, squirming lightly, but Leonardo just hugged him tighter. Also, he seemed to have buried his head in the crook of Ezio's neck. It was rather embarrassing, with Rosa and Antonio there, but if they'd just be kind enough to leave, he'd be quite happy.

"They are, rather," Antonio replied, sounding vaguely sickened. Ezio thought he could sympathize. He was a Very Dangerous Assassin. Very Dangerous Assassins were not cute. They should not be "aw"-inducing. They should be scary. And intimidating. And -

"You smell good," Leonardo mumbled into his neck. Ezio's train of thought stopped. All of a sudden, smelling good was important. Because apparently, Leonardo liked it when he smelled good. Which made it more important than convincing Rosa he was a Very Dangerous Assassin.

"Better than Antonio?" he asked suspiciously. To his left, Antonio snorted. Ezio glared at him. He was just jealous because Leonardo liked him better. Leonardo nodded into his neck.

"Come, Rosa," Antonio announced, getting to his feet. Ezio watched him suspiciously. This better not be a nefarious plot to get Leonardo back to leaning on him instead of clutching Ezio. Because that just wasn't going to happen. "Let us leave before Ezio decides you, too, are trying to steal Leonardo."

"I knew it," Ezio muttered. That was as good as a confession. Antonio wanted to steal his Leonardo. Possibly with Rosa as an accomplice. Well, Ezio wasn't going to let either of them anywhere near him. "Get out of here before I" -another hiccup- "before I get you," he ended lamely. Rosa let out an ear-piercing shriek of mirth.

"But Antonio," she pleaded, tears nearly running down her face. "they're just so much fun to laugh at."

After that, Ezio decided the best option would be to ignore them. Leonardo gave a cheery wave goodbye as Antonio dragged Rosa out the workshop door, leaving the two blissfully alone.

"You're cute when you sulk," Leonardo mentioned after a long pause.

"I'm not cute, Leonardo," Ezio insisted. "Girls are cute. Kittens are cute. You're cute. But assassins are not cute. Assassins are dangerous, handsome and dashing. Never cute."

"You think I'm cute?" Leonardo interrupted, sounding delighted. If he remembered this in the morning, he was going to die of embarrassment. Ezio started to nod enthusiastically, but stopped when it made the room spin again. Leonardo beamed, placing a large, soppy kiss on Ezio's cheek. The assassin turned bright red, but Leonardo was far too drunk to notice. They sat there for quite a while, drinking all the way through. Apart from the occasional move to get more wine, Ezio remained at least partially on Leonardo the entire night. This was partly because Leonardo did not want to let him go, but also because Leonardo was his, and he had not chased that bastardo Antonio away for nothing. Every now and again, Leonardo would laugh for no apparent reason. Ezio learned to appreciate these, as they were normally a sign he would soon receive yet another sloppy kiss. Eventually, however, when they had run out of alcohol, they decided it was time for bed. Neither of them mentioned the possibility that Ezio would sleep somewhere other than the workshop. It seemed absurd. So the two of them lurched up the stairs (though not without falling several times) and crawled into Leonardo's bed fully dressed. Leonardo snuggled up close to him. As close as was possible, though Ezio thought he may have managed to redefine the limits of 'possible' here. And with Leonardo curled into his side, Ezio promptly fell asleep.


"Dio mio," Ezio groaned, rolling over. "What happened last night?"

Though he knew he should open his eyes, if only to find out where he was, he just couldn't bring himself to yet. He'd also rather like to know who was sleeping so close to him, because he was pretty certain it wasn't a woman. With a headache this bad, he could always be mistaken, but it seemed a reasonable assumption. Slowly, he opened his eyes. He had been right. It was another man in bed with him. Why, he wondered, was Leonardo so close? Perhaps he hadn't been the only one drunk last night. Well, in that case, Leonardo could just share his misery. None too gently, he shook Leonardo awake. Despite his throbbing head, it was rather amusing to watch Leonardo slowly sit up. At first he was a strange shade of green, and Ezio desperately hoped he wasn't going to throw up. But then, as he looked at Ezio, he turned the most adorable shade of bright red Ezio had ever seen. Not that he'd ever tell Leonardo he was cute. The one time he'd hinted at it had been the one time he had seen Leonardo truly violent.

"I'm taking it that you don't know what happened last night, either?" Ezio asked dryly, watching Leonardo splutter and blush. The artist shook his head ruefully, and Ezio grinned. Whatever had happened, it couldn't have been too bad. They still had their clothes, which Ezio personally thought was rather disappointing. Another thing he'd never dare mention to Leonardo. Still, it was comfortable here, especially with an embarrassed Leonardo so close.

"Well in that case, neither of us are moving until we figure it out."