Summary: When they're together, he demands that she puts away her masks. She's allowed to feel, really, he promises/CraigxEllie/fluff
She's so good at pretending, to good, really; it scares him sometimes. He notices it, how she puts on her show, how when something upsets her she clenches for a split second, as if bracing herself for a blow. Then something flashes in her eyes and she puts on a fake smile and rushes. When she fakes, she speeds up, as if she has to act quickly or her thoughts will catch up with her, and hurt her somehow. She did it with Ashley, Manny, and Yvette, and he hates it.
She always acts so cool and collected, never letting anyone in or sharing the pain. When she does cave, she does it privately; she writes or takes it out on herself. (He shudders to think of that. No one should get to harm his Ellie, not even herself.) It kills him to think that he hurt her so strongly and for so long. Sometimes he just wants to smack himself for all he did to her, for how much of an idiot he was for choosing Manny. He always did like red hair better.
Her little act of pretending bothers him. Just once he'd like to see her break. Sometimes he feels bad or sick for thinking that, but really he just wants proof she's affected, that she isn't a robot, that he can make her feel things. Because really, that's all he wants, for her to feel, for her to accept the fact that she's not perfect but she's wonderful and beautiful anyway. When they're together, he demands that she puts away her masks. She's allowed to feel, really, he promises.
They lie together, every night. And every night, when her guard is down, and she's no longer Eleanor, but his stunning Ellie, he likes to trace his finger down her naked back, spelling out words and playing the chords for his songs. She shivers, she always does, and goosebumps cover her skin. She usually lets out a little sigh and rolls over, her red hair splaying out like a million rose petals. She looks up at him, with her moss green eyes, and smiles. A small, innocent, shy little half-smile, but to Craig, it's everything. That moment is what Craig looks forward to every night; proof that she can feel, proof that he affects her, proof that she's still in this with him. Proof that she's his, and she's not faking this time.