I wish I were clever, like she is. It must be so nice to remember everything you're told, and to be at the top of the class. And I wish I knew why I had been put in this House. Everyone else is so much braver and smarter and more talented than I am. I can't even remember the passwords...
I wish people would notice me. Do you know how hard it is to have older siblings? Always being compared to the others for one thing or another, always getting their hand-me-downs and castoffs, things they don't want any more or are too worn out to be useful or because there's not enough money to buy me a new one. I'm not as athletic or smart or good or funny as they are. Isn't there some way for me to step out of their shadow?
I wish everyone would stop harping over him, just because he has some stupid scar on his head. As if that makes him so great. Those two that hang out with him think they're so great, too, just because she's smart and his father works for the Ministry. They act as if names and money aren't important, when everyone knows that they are.
I wish he didn't look so much like his father. Every day in class he reminds me that I was never as good as his father was. Quidditch, lessons, you name it; he was always better. Even got away with breaking school rules, as if they didn't apply to him, or his friends. And now I have to watch his son be the same way, and do nothing, because he's everyone's darling.
I wish that I wasn't afraid to fail. Everyone-teachers, classmates-expects me to be the brightest, to know every answer. It's so hard. What if I let someone down? What will my parents think? What I wouldn't give to be as carefree as those two are, not worrying about breaking rules or failing classes. Of course, they don't have to worry as much, since their parents are wizards.
I wish the brat had died. Then I'd have one less obstacle in the way of my return to power. But no. He had to survive, and make the entire wizarding world hail him as a hero. And for what? Supposedly destroying me. Well, I have news for them all: I haven't been destroyed, and his death is just going to make my return more of a triumph.
I wish I could be normal. Have a family that loves me. No one expecting me to do something great every moment just because of who I am. Not have to worry about You-Know-Who trying to kill me. Just normal. Is that possible? I didn't ask to be different, yet everyone seems to think I am. I don't even understand why, sometimes. I mean, I know I'm not the smartest, and I don't know a lot of things that everyone else has grown up with. So what's so special about me?
I wish...
I wish.