Summary: A grieving Grissom. Warning: CHARACTER DEATH…

As I watched your casket being lowered into the ground, I remembered the first time we met, how I thought you were secretly an angel sent from above. You were the most beautiful woman I'd seen. You had these dazzling eyes that captivated me, a slender figure with curves in all the right places and a wondrous smile, like the sun.

That opinion soon drifted to the back of my mind, however, when I asked you to work with me and my team of CSI's. I had to be professional around you. I couldn't let my feelings affect my work and the work of everyone around me. I didn't exactly wear my heart on my sleeve, or let my emotions go unchecked at work, but everyone would soon notice the change in me; especially Catherine.

She had a way of knowing exactly what was going through my head and a way of finding out if I wasn't willing to tell her. It's safe to say, that's what made me fall in love with her. I still thought of you as my perfect angel, but you were too young for me, and I was not exactly perfect myself. When I had that much unexpected dinner invitation, I was scared; scared to say yes, because I'd vowed to get over you, and I wasn't about to jeopardise both our careers. Yours was flourishing. I couldn't be selfish.

And then, it was too late. You'd moved on. Someone else let you in. You quickly fell for him, and I let you go. He would be so much better for you than I would have been. He was young and a gentleman. He was a co-worker and at first, I was hard on you for attempting to make it work with him, but that seemed to push you further away; further into his arms, his heart.

When you both came into work after a particularly long day together, I saw the glow you both had on your skin. I knew then, that I had truly lost you to this man. You both were unable to keep your hands off each other, so I had to separate you that night. I know it was hard, but you couldn't let your feelings for each other affect your work that night. I saw the glare you gave me, but I let it go over my head. It wasn't anything personal, purely professional.

The day of your accident, I'd been truly harsh on you. I'd given you a hard case because I thought you'd be able to handle it alone, but when that suspect threatened you, and then skipped bail, I saw the panic engulf your feminine features and watched as you speed out the building in your Tahoe. But I wasn't expecting your car to veer off the road and into a passing truck.

When I heard about the event from a local officer, I didn't show any remorse, although the guilt was ripping me apart. I should not have let you out of my sight. I should have made you stay at work, and then let someone else take you home at the end of shift. But I didn't think. I never did.

Now, as I hold your grieving boyfriend in my arms, showing my support, letting him sob into my clean suit, I can't help but think about you. You are my perfect angel; a raindrop from heaven. I know that I will never let myself or anyone else forget you.

Catherine is watching me from my other side, giving me reassuring looks, clutching my hand as Warrick talks about you to the many other grievers surrounding me. As Warrick finishes, Nick looks down to your casket and softly whispers "I love you." I know you heard him.

I look behind your casket at the tombstone that explains you completely.

Sara Sidle

Beloved friend, co-worker and girlfriend

16th September 1971 – 7th January 2005

Long may she rest among the other angels

I can't help but smile.

Perfect…