Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.
Author's Note: Just an angsty (sort of) post-birth one-shot of Quinn's life with the baby and having some sort of stability.
If We Don't Start Here, Then Where Do We?
I'm sick. My nose is stuffy and I can't talk and I have a month-old baby to take care of. Shit.
He shows up at my house with the diapers I asked him to pick up and a can of my favourite soup – Campbell's tomato – just for me. I sniffle and get red-eyed and he mutters something like, "Poor thing," and kisses my forehead. I can tell the chemistry is more apparent with him than it ever was with my ex, who's now dating that fashion-lacking Broadway mongrel. (Rebounding? No idea.) When I get butterflies as he kisses me, I think maybe I should give Leanne's biological father another chance. Then I remember the act he put on when I gave him his first chance, and decide not to be instinctual. I'll wait for him to clean up his act first.
He is the first one to speak. "I'm giving up my pool cleaning business. Looking for an after-school job that pays better. One where I can have the weekends off, so I can help take care of Leanne then." He smiles his irresistible trademark smile and I can't help but sort-of smile back. I can tell no more pool cleaning also means no more cougars. So that's okay.
"Oh, and uh – here's my cell phone. You can hold on to it I'm not gonna use it." He gives me a look and I know what he means. No more two-timing me with that bitchy Latina cheerleader I used to call my friend.
"And I know you don't want to be with me right now, but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop trying. I get that maybe it will take you some time, but I want to be with you and the little squirt...like, a lot. Like...I don't know, a family."
I look at my feet. He has it all wrong. Of course I want to be with him, equally as much, if not more, than he wants to be with me. But I can't trust him anymore. Not in the same way, since he betrayed me and shattered my confidence and my heart when I needed him the most. Who am I to talk about betrayal, though? Finn, Rachel, my parents, Finn, Rachel, Finn, Finn...
I don't know what to say so I say nothing.
When I look up, he's taken Leanne out of the crib. The tiny, delicate baby girl looks so safe in his strong arms. She woke up crying so he's rocking her back to sleep and singing a lullaby I can't make out because he's so quiet. She calms down a bit and my knight in his shining mohawk steals a quick glance at me before resuming the singing. He really has a gift. With two glee kids as parents, I'll be surprised if little Leanne doesn't take up music. But I'm not going to make labels like my parents did in my family. Because look where that's gotten me – sitting with a crib and a baby in a spare room at Brittany's house.
Leanne seems to like him. Maybe we'll move in with Daddy one day, little baby, I think to her. We could be a family. You, him, and me. You're my everything. I love you, little baby.
I never chose to be religious. It just happened to be my upbringing and therefore my only option in life. Sex before marriage is okay in my book, as long as it's with the right person. But now, I'm too scared to have sex, like, ever after what I've been through. And I'm not going to "give it up to him" any time soon. I don't know if he's come to terms with that. But he's not sleeping with cougars and he's not sexting, and he's here, right now, taking care of the kid when I can't. He's trying to change, for me and her.
Well, it's a start.