This is the first part in my Patchwork Family series. Please enjoy!
Norway: Lukas Sørensen
Lukas Sørensen was a perfectly normal boy; normal, but maybe a bit smarter than the other children. In his mind, everything about him and his life was just like the other children around him. What Lukas didn't realize was different about him from the other boys and girls was that it was not normal for a little boy to be born to a father that was seventeen by a mother who was sixteen.
Lukas was an accident. His mother and father didn't mean to have a child as young as they did, but they also knew that they would never give the baby boy up when he was born. His mother's parents disowned her for her mistake and Lukas never knew his maternal grandparents. His father's parents looked after him while his mom and dad finished school. They were disappointed but loved their first grandson with all their hearts.
His parents married when he was four. Lukas had been the ring bearer and everyone had crooned over how cute he had been. By this time, both his mother and father were out of upper secondary school and had found jobs. They were able to get a house for themselves and move out on their own with their son. Lukas's family had finally achieved the sense of normalcy they had so desperately wanted. Everything was normal and everything was happy.
Lukas had a normal childhood growing up. He made good grades in school and had good teachers that adored him. He had piano lessons after school on Thursdays and always played solos during the winter recitals. He got third place in the school spelling bee when he was seven, which was pretty remarkable for a second grader. He brought lunch to school with him and his mother always cut the crusts off of his sandwiches for him.
He was a quiet child who preferred to read than play outside with the other boys and girls. He had few friends, but the ones he did have were his very best friends. He wasn't bullied, but he wasn't popular either. His mother and father both loved him very much and supported him in whatever he wanted to do and in his interests. Lukas liked having his mother read fairytales to him at bedtime and played the wizard when he played pretend with his father.
When Lukas was ten years old, a number of incidents occurred that began to rock his world to the point that it still hasn't stopped pitching and swaying. The first incident was when, unexpectedly, Lukas's grandmother passed away. He didn't know it, but she had had a stroke and passed in her sleep. The results were felt by the entire family. It was the first time Lukas began to see cracks in his perfectly average life.
His father took his grandmother's death hard. He would lock himself away in his office for days on end. He used all of his vacation days, though the family never went on vacation. Lukas would hear his father cry often and the sound scared him to the point he covered his ears whenever he went past his father's room. His mother told him that his father was just very sad that his mom had died. That sometimes some people got sad more often than others and sometimes they're sad for longer.
His mother seemed more tired more often. Neither of them played with Lukas like they used to. Lukas began to look after himself more often and learned to do many things by himself. He learned to make lunches for himself for school and how to cut the crusts off of his sandwiches. He learned how to put himself to bed and how to take his own baths. He didn't have to, but he wanted to make it easier on his mom.
The second incident was when one day his father burst from his room and announced that they were moving to Iceland. He was all smiles and it was like nothing had ever happened. That he had never been depressed in the first place.
"My parents are Icelanders. I am an Icelander. Lukas is half Icelandic. I want this family to get back to its roots." He had boldly declared, smiling broadly and hefting Lukas up into his arms. Lukas was confused, but happy to see that his dad was smiling again.
That same month was the first time he had heard his parents fight.
"We can't just leave!"
Lukas had just finished his bath and was brushing his teeth when he heard his mother angrily shout that. He peeked from the bathroom door and down the hall towards the lit kitchen. He could see tall, exaggerated shadows cast on the wall of the hall. His mother was throwing her arms out in frustration.
"I have a job here. You have a job here! A job, I might add, that you haven't been to in almost a month! We don't have the money to just move whenever you want to!"
"I told you, Mom left me a large inheritance. I think she changed her will after Lukas was born. She's looking after us." It was his father's calm voice trying to placate his mother.
Lukas rinsed and spit, putting his toothbrush back and turning off the bathroom light as he left. He crept down the hall and leaned against the wall to the immediate right of the kitchen entranceway. The little boy sank so that he was sitting, listening and staring straight ahead.
"So you're going to squander your mom's money by impulsively moving to an entirely different country!? Do you have any idea how insane you sound right now?"
"Else, just listen to me. I can't stay here. I just can't. If I stay here, I really will go insane. Do you want that, huh? I really think that is what is best for us right now. I heard rumors that the firm is opening a branch in Reykjavik. I'll see about being part of them team sent over to oversee the expansion. It'll work out. Besides, you were saying you wanted a change of scenery."
Lukas heard his mother sigh tiredly. "I swear to god, if it weren't for Lukas, I sometimes think I would have divorced you by now…"
It was then that Lukas realized that while both his parents loved him very much, that his mother maybe didn't love his father as much as he loved her.
Two months after that Lukas found himself living in Reykjavik, Iceland and he was the weird new kid who had transferred in. Lukas didn't like Iceland all that much. It rained often and it was nowhere near as green as Norway had been. The kids weren't as nice here as they had been in Norway, he had convinced himself.
Lukas still did well in school in Iceland. He still got good grades and the teachers still were very nice to him. He still did piano after school, but now it was on Mondays and he didn't play a solo in the winter recital. He was still the quiet boy who preferred to read rather than play outside with the other boys and girls. But he didn't have as many friends as he did in Norway, which is to say that he kept to himself more often than not and only had people he talked to sometimes. Making friends began to seem more like a hassle than anything.
Lukas moved up from primary school to lower secondary school. He began to notice that maybe he was like his father and got sad more often than his classmates and was sad longer, but he knew now that it was called depression. He didn't dare mention it to anyone. Lukas could hear his mother and father fighting more often so he being depressed seemed miniscule in comparison. Besides, it didn't interfere with his school work so he figured it wasn't bad enough to worry about.
Life continued in this fashion until Lukas was sixteen. His mother and his father called him into the living room. His mother was sitting with a soft smile on her face. Behind the chair stood his father, looking as proud as could be with a giant smile stretching across his face. Vaguely Lukas wondered if he had left his room into a different reality where his parents were both happy with each other and were going to announce that they were going to move back to Norway.
"Lukas, we have something very exciting to tell you," his mother began and glanced giddily up at his father. "Do you want to tell him or should I?" Lukas began to not want to hear what the exciting news was.
"Together," his father decided for them and met Lukas's indigo-colored eyes with his own, only they were alight with joy.
"Lukas-"
"Honey-"
"We're going to have a baby!"
Lukas was pretty sure his brain short circuited. He was now also convinced this was an alternative reality. Only this was not the one he had wished for.
"I… what?!" he searched both of their expressions for any indication that this was a joke.
"We got the news last week," his mother explained as she rubbed her belly which didn't seem any different than it normally did. Lukas scrutinized her, expecting her to balloon in size any minute now. "We wanted to wait for the right moment to tell you, but your father got too excited."
Lukas opened his mouth before snapping it shut and nervously licking his lips. He felt like he was dreaming. Everything seemed surreal and intangible. "…Why…?" was all he was able to manage.
"We missed having a baby around the house," his father replied and Lukas felt his stomach twist in a weird way.
"I'm going for a walk." Lukas turned his back on the two of them, moving as if in a daze towards the door.
"Lukas, honey?" his mother's voice held a twinge of concern in it.
He ignored it and left, shutting the door behind him. Lukas shoved his hands deep into his coat's pockets and kicked at pebbles as he walked up the street. As night began to fall and the cool breeze off the coast hit him in the face, Lukas childishly decided that there was no way he was going to accept having a baby sibling.
Lukas's parents obviously didn't have the same sentiments as him because they began to prepare to have a new baby in the house. Four months later and they learned that it was going to be a baby boy. Their little house was soon becoming choked with pale blue and yellows. His grandfather airmailed them a bassinet and it was official. There was going to be a baby in the house.
Strangely enough, it wasn't as bad as Lukas was expecting it to be. Things seemed golden tinted in the house. His parents no longer fought and it was almost like they were back in Norway before everything turned sour. Lukas found the excitement and mood to be infectious and he gave up on his silly vow to hate his baby brother unconditionally.
He helped his dad paint his study, soon to be the baby's room, blue with white stripes. He helped him put the bassinet together and the changing table. He played piano for his mother because he had read somewhere that unborn babies could still hear music and that classical music would help with their development later on.
As a new life was growing, life continued to march on for Lukas. He graduated from lower secondary school. It was a modest ceremony, but both his parents and his grandfather were there. They couldn't have been prouder looking. That evening they let him pick wherever he wanted to go out to eat. He chose to eat at Perlan because it was expensive and he was drawn in by the novelty of a revolving restaurant.
Lukas was seventeen when his baby brother was born.
He was at the library when he got the phone call from his father, who sounded almost hysterical, demanding that he come meet him in the parking lot immediately. His mother had gone into labor. Lukas had quickly packed his things and run from the room.
The drive to the National University Hospital of Iceland was silent and his father seemed more scared than elated about the fact that his second son was in the process of being born. The weather couldn't have been more oppressive and ominous. Dark, low clouds hung over the city, promising rain soon. Lukas could feel the prickles of panic beginning to build in his own chest. He tightened his grip on his messenger bag strap. Something had to be wrong. His father wouldn't look the way he did if everything was going smoothly.
"Dad…?" Lukas began, looking worriedly over at his father.
"She's bleeding a lot." His father's voice was tight with terror. "More than the doctor's think is safe." And that was the end of the conversation. Outside the clouds opened up and it began to rain.
Sitting in the waiting room was even worse. His father continually paced the floor to the point Lukas was worried he would wear a groove into the tile. Lukas was unable to focus on his music so he pulled the headphones from his head, mussing up his blond hair. He anxiously tapped his feet and picked at a loose thread on his t-shirt and tried to feel like he was going to vomit at any moment.
The day stretched on into evening and then into night. Outside the hospital a storm began to lay siege on Reykjavik. Lukas found himself waking from naps that he was unaware he had fallen into. He was pretty sure that his father didn't sleep at all and continued to pace up and down the waiting room, flagging down any nurse or doctor that would listen for any news. Neither of them ate lunch or dinner and neither felt they could keep anything down if they did.
At 4:15am on June 17th, a grim looking nurse emerged from the maternity ward and approached Lukas and his father. Both of them snapped their weary looking faces up to gauge the nurse's expression. The prognosis wasn't looking good.
"Well…?" His father had never looked or sounded so tired to Lukas before.
The nurse almost looked like she didn't want to tell them. She fidgeted with her watch and looked everywhere but at them. "Congratulations, Mr. Sørensen, your wife gave birth to a healthy baby boy."
"And? What about Else?" His father pressed and his tone was becoming desperate.
The nurse swallowed thickly and looked to the side. "….I'm afraid she didn't survive the birth…"
It was as if a bucket of ice cold water had been thrown on Lukas. He was sure his expression was openly shocked and disbelieving. All sound seemed to dim out other than a grainy static that was buzzing in his ears. He watched his father lurch from his seat and it was almost like watching a movie in slow motion. His father was grabbing the nurse by the shoulders and shaking her while he yelled and tears rolled down his face.
The nurse was holding her hands up and speaking calmly and softly to Lukas's father. He sagged against her, brokenly sobbing. She patted his back and whispered something in his ear. He looked up to meet her eyes before flicking them over and locking them on Lukas. His father extended a shaking hand to him.
"Come, Lukas. Don't you want to meet your baby brother…?"
They were both taken back into the maternity ward so that they could peer into the nursery. The static in Lukas's head dimmed some and he could hear the murmur of doctors and nurses. He lagged behind his father and the nurse leading the procession wondering why it even mattered if he had a little brother. His mother was dead and that golden light was going to leave his home for good this time. He slipped his headphones back on his head, the noises of the hospital beginning to grate on his nerves. Why was it that everyone who worked in medicine had shoes that squeaked on tile? If he ever worked in a hospital, he'd make sure his shoes wouldn't squeak.
The hallway outside the nursery was dimmed, probably to keep the light from disturbing the infants within. Lukas took the last few steps to stand before the glass to peer inside the nursery. He rested his forehead against the cool glass, his music thumping in his ears and gazed at all of the tiny cribs that were lined with pink and blue blankets and the even tinier bodies that lay within them sleeping. The nurse left Lukas and his father and moved between the cribs until she got to a crib that contained a blue bundle. She lifted the baby up out of the crib and brought him out for Lukas and his father to see.
Lukas was astonished by how small he was. Awed, he slowly slipped his headphones off to hang loosely around his neck and switched off his CD player. His baby brother shifted a little in his blanket cocoon before blinking still light-sensitive eyes open. They were his mother's eyes. Lukas felt his heart clench. He was fully ready to hate this child for taking his mother from him. He was so ready to denounce the infant who never had a choice in whether or not he was born. But every ounce of hate that Lukas thought he had in his heart evaporated. Looking into those purple eyes, Lukas had never seen anything so beautiful.
"Do you know what you want to name him?" The nurse quietly asked, shaking both Lukas and his father from their reverie.
"Emil…" Lukas's father's voice was thick with tears. "That's what Else wanted to name him... His name will be Emil Sørensen…"