I don't always use the tub - but when I do, it's with Misaki Harada. /Tsubasa, Misaki, and the Andou household's bath time./ "Goddamn it, Andou!" Oh, and I forgot to mention - she screams bloody murder whenever I tell someone about it.

Two Rubber Duckies

"Honey, you forgot to throw the diapers in the garbage bin!"

"Okay, dear! Hang on for a moment!"

"Oka- what the fuck are you doing, Andou? You're supposed to bathe our baby with warm water!"

"Alrigh-"

"Oh, hell! Not boiling water, you idiot! Shh, it's alright, sweetie, don't cry -"

"For hell's sake, you go bathe the baby while I do the the laundry. I'm getting out of here."

That, ladies and gentlemen, is a typical morning at our house. Not that I regret being a father - sometimes, I just get frustrated whenever I bathe our kid in the wrong way and get myself soaked to the bone. It's not my fault that my paternal instincts don't activate during hands-on child rearing.

Sometimes, though, I love bathing times, especially when Misaki tries to help (or dictate) in the process, and we both end up with dripping wet clothes.

"So, since the baby's already settled, how about we go take a bath now?" she says, ruffling her damp cotton candy hair.

I, of course, drop to the couch tiredly. "You go first."

Then I'd earn that suggestive quirk of an eyebrow, and Misaki crosses her arms. "I mean, let's take a bath together."

"...I'll be more than pleasured."

Hot, steamy showers are the second best - good thing Misaki's willing (and I guess agitated, too, but she just wouldn't admit it to me) to use the tub this time, though I'm not really a fan of a long duration inside the bathroom.

Tubs are the best of the best, I tell you. They're heavenly and are good replacements for beds - add in the fact that every surface is slippery and every motion is fluid and just...nice.

I don't always use the tub - but when I do, it's with Misaki Harada.

And it's so damn wonderful.

"Goddamn it, Andou!" Oh, and I forgot to mention - she screams bloody murder whenever I tell someone about it.

Which is normal for me, because she only uses her high-pitched demonic voice when she's either angry or on the brink of insanity.

By insanity, I mean madness in pleasure.

So there you go, the morning bath time of the Andou family - my family. Though things do get messy, every chaotic day is priceless, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

I guess things would get a bit messier, because there's a fair probability that a second baby is on the way.

"Shut up, Andou, or I'm going to asphyxiate you in your sleep. You do not talk to a recorder about our moments together."

"Oh, come on, honey, it could be a potential guide for men out there with troubles in be-"

Spank!

I could learn to live with this.

Maybe.