A/N: Ah, the product of boredom! Well, not too horribly. I got inspired to write this as a crackfic after we did something similar to a guy in my Drama class. Note to anyone: For your own safety, refrain from falling asleep in a class that has stage makeup at others' disposal. Now, onto the story. Enjoy!
P.S. I see this as being set at the end of their 3rd year. After they rescued Sirius and whatnot. Kind of like a 'missing moment.'
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Sorry.
It was nearing the end of the year, and no one was focusing in classes. In fact, everyone was either staring out the windows day-dreaming, or being lulled to sleep by the stifling heat of the classrooms.
Harry, Ron and Hermione were currently in Charms class, only Hermione focusing on tiny Professor Flitwick's lecture that basically was a review of the year.
Harry and Ron were playing a short game of Exploding Snap, and when Hermione injected that they should be paying attention, they argued that it was a review "meaning we've already sat through all this stuff before, Hermione!" She always countered that they would need it for their upcoming year.
They, of course, ignored this and continued their game.
Until, it was over. By now, Flitwick had set them on practicing some of the more important charms they had learnt during the year, to make sure they hadn't fallen out of practice.
Harry, after getting fed up with Hermione's nagging, gave in and decided to humor her, and did some of the charms. Ron, who never did anything Hermione asked of him, promptly put his head down and fell asleep.
"I swear, he never does anything he's supposed to!" Hermione complained to Harry, waving her wand and successfully performing one of the more complex charms they had touched on.
"This is Ron we're talking about, would you expect any thing different?" Harry asked, putting his wand back in his sleeve, already packing up for the end of class.
"One of these days, I wish he would get some comeuppance, though, just so he knows he shouldn't do such things."
"I dunno what 'comeuppance' means exactly, but I do have an idea to discourage him from falling asleep in class." Harry said, that characteristic spark appearing in his eye. The one that only shows up when he's about to pull a prank.
"'Comeuppance' is basically the same concept as 'karma'. What're you planning?" Hermione was a bit apprehensive. While Ron always went for Harry's plans enthusiastically, Hermione usually needed some persuading.
"Well," Harry started, "since I know that Ron's a very heavy sleeper—I do share a dormitory with him, and have to listen to his snoring every night—I also know that he won't wake up if we do some . . . decorating. On his face." Harry chuckled a bit at the end.
"What're you implying? That we should put makeup on him?" Hermione actually thought this could be a bit amusing, and therefore was more inclined to divulge in Harry's plan.
"Of course! I mean, transfiguring him would be best, but we don't know how to do that yet," Harry said, excited. "I mean, you do have makeup, right? You're a girl, after all."
"Er, no, I don't have makeup," Hermione said, blushing. "But I know where I can get some—Parvati and Lavender. They're always putting on gobs of the stuff."
"Well I was hoping this would be a 'right now' kind of thing, considering he's asleep and we have nothing better to do." Harry's face fell as his plans fell through.
"We should be doing our Charms work. . . But I never said it couldn't be right now." Hermione took up her wand and waved it. Within the second, a small, pink bag came floating to them from the direction of the other third year Gryffindor girls.
"Here we are." Hermione looked pleased with herself, and picked up the bag. "I dunno what you're planning exactly, but we have enough variety in here to make things interesting." She handed Harry the bag.
"You're brilliant, Hermione." Harry took the bag, careful not to let anyone else see what he was doing until it was apparent.
He took out a small case full of different strips of powder-like stuff. There was blue, pink, purple, and green, and all different shades of the colors. There was a little knob-like brush in a slot at the bottom of the case. "Er, Hermione? What do I do with this?" He held it up, and looked at it curiously.
"Oh Merlin, Harry. Don't think up a prank, and then not know how to play it out! Here," Hermione said, grabbing the container of makeup, and taking the brush. "What color?"
"Hmmm. You can do more than one, right? Do pink and green. They'd upset him the most," Harry said deviously, chuckling.
"Pink and green eye shadow coming up," Hermione laughed, rubbing one side of the brush along one of the pink strips. She turned Ron's head to the side—glad that he was such a heavy sleeper—and ran the pink powder along Ron's left eyelid.
Harry laughed at how idiotic that alone looked on Ron. Hermione turned the brush over, and rubbed the green on Ron's right eyelid. Harry laughed harder, earning a "Shh! Work, Mr. Potter!" from Professor Flitwick.
"Harry! If this is going to work, you've got to shush!" Hermione reprimanded him, laughing a little herself.
Harry composed himself best he could. "Here, give me that. I want to do some."
Hermione closed the 'eye shadow' container, put it back in the bag, and handed it all over to Harry. He dug around in it for a moment, and pulled out a big, fluffy brush. "Why couldn't I have used this one?"
"It's too big for eye shadow. You would've gotten it all over the place. That's for cheeks."
"Oh." Harry pulled out another container of powder, this time all of it different shades of red. "Perfect."
He swirled the fluffy brush in the red stuff, sending up clouds of the powder around his hand. "Will this come off of me?"
"Yes, with soap," Hermione said.
"Good. Let's not tell Ron that," Harry replied, brushing the stuff onto Ron's face, with no particular method. He stopped when Ron sneezed because Harry had got it up his nose.
"Now his face matches his hair. Lovely, Harry. You should really look into the cosmetology field." Hermione's voice dripped with sarcasm, and she gave him a glare to match. She sighed. "Here, let's do his lips next. Gloss or lipstick?"
"Is there a difference?"
Hermione sighed again. "Do you want them all shiny or not?"
"Hmm. Shiny. More embarrassing."
Hermione nodded, and pulled out a tube of what looked like purple goop.
"Are you going to make him. . . eat it?" Harry really was clueless when it came to make up, and when he considered his gender, he was quite glad of it, too.
Hermione gave him a look. "No! I'm going to put it on his lips, of course. It's lip gloss. It's in the name."
"Oh." Harry watched as she opened the tube, the little brush on the end covered in the purple 'gloss' goop.
"Harry? Hold his head up so I don't get this everywhere. It makes such a mess," Hermione ordered, waiting.
Harry complied, and lifted Ron's head by his chin. Ron started drooling. "Eww."
Hermione pulled another face, and reached in the bag and pulled out a handkerchief cloth. She carefully, with her hands as far away from him as possible, wiped the drool off Ron's face. "Ew, ew, ew, ew!" When she was done, she threw the cloth away and it fluttered to the floor. "I know I probably shouldn't leave it there, but I am not picking it up."
"I wouldn't either," Harry told her, readjusting his hand, which made Ron's head flop to the side.
"Let's get this done with. Class will be over soon, and I don't want to leave the job half finished." With that, she brushed the purple gloss over Ron's lower lip, rubbing it in with another brush. She repeated with his top lip.
Harry burst out laughing again. "Beautiful! He looks a right lady!" He set Ron's head down, so as not to draw attention with the 'thump' that was sure to occur if he had just let go.
Hermione permitted herself a few giggles. "Yes, it rather suits him, doesn't it?" More giggles.
She closed up the makeup bag, and waved her wand. It floated back to it's rightful place in Lavender's school bag, who was none the wiser that it had been gone. (She had been gossiping with Parvati the entire class, and therefore never opened her bag to get out her books.)
"Alright class, you may pack up your belongings and wait for the bell. It should ring in about 5 minutes," Professor Flitwick called out, and there was a great amount of shuffling as everyone packed up.
There was a loud chatter as everyone talked, queuing up in front of the door to leave. Harry and Hermione hung back, waiting on Ron to wake up.
The bell rang, and Ron's head shot up. "Huh, is class over? Oh, good," he mumbled, grabbing his bag and slinging it on his shoulder. He yawned. "You two coming?"
Harry sniggered. "Of course. D'you think I'd want to stay here? And miss everyone's reactions?" He muttered under his breath, just loud enough for Hermione to hear. She burst into a fit of giggles.
As they walked down the corridor, everyone who glanced in their direction started to snigger, laugh, chuckle, and point them out to their friends. More specifically, they pointed Ron out to their friends. He did put on a show with his face done up as it were.
"Did I miss something in class? Everyone seems to be rather interested in us. It's not normal. I mean, they got over Harry being here already. . . ," Ron asked, looking about.
"Oh, nothing special. Right, Hermione?"
"Right."
Ron shrugged. "Whatever you say. I'm going to kip into the lavatory for a moment. Wait on me, will you?"
"Sure." Harry waited, exchanging glances with Hermione, both trying to hold in their laughter. Not two seconds later, they heard the shout.
"WHAT DID YOU TWO DO TO ME?" He ran out of the lavatory, his pink, green, red, and purple face even redder from his anger-induced flush.
"Hermione did it!" Harry said quickly, still trying to hold back his laughter.
"It was Harry's idea!"
"Since I can't hit girls," Ron said, with a meaningful look at Hermione, "I'll take it out on someone I can hit." He glared at Harry, who ran off. Ron gave chase, with Hermione behind, yelling, "Don't run in the corridors!"
A/N: Funny, lame, eh? I liked it. Sort of. I know Hermione probably wouldn't have been that knowledable of makeup, but she is a girl. . . And, reading it through, it sounds like there's hints of HarryHermione. I ship HarryGinny, in this they're just kids who're ganging up on their friend. Uhm. . . Yeah. Reviews make me happy :]
-Zenelia*Sky