There Comes a Time
By Pervert101
Rated T
Dedication: This story is dedicated to my biggest fans and groupies: jules14, TheBattlingBard and Telcontar Strider. I love you guys!!
Author's Note: I wrote this story on direct orders from Tolkien himself. He came to me in a dream and told me he forgot to put this in The Laws and Customs of the Eldar. I promised him I would. I hope he may now rest in peace.
"There comes a time," Thranduil said, "In every male's life that he must to this."
"I know," Legolas replied, "But it does not seem very pleasant."
"It is not as bad as you think," Thranduil told him, "And you only have to have it done once a year."
"That's true," Legolas admitted, "I guess I will get it over with now."
Thranduil nodded and Legolas left to go to the infirmary. It was his 1000th begetting day as was custom with the Eldar he now had to get his prostate examined every year. He nervously waited in the infirmary until there was a healer free. He sat uneasily on the table and waited. He wished it was over.
"Alright, my lord," the healer said, "We will begin. I will be gentle because I know that this is your first time."
Legolas gulped.
"Stand up please," the healer ordered, "And pull the pants down and place your hands flat on the table!"
Legolas slowly obeyed the orders. He wished he did not have such an attractive ass and peepee. He knew the healer would probably enjoy himself. The healer spread some purple goo on his fingers.
"Alright," he said as he stood behind Legolas, "This will be over in a minute. Ready? One…Two..Three"
Legolas almost gasped when he felt the intrusive fingers in his bunghole. It burned a little and was relatively uncomfortable but not too painful. After a little probing by the healer in his bunghole and feeling u p his sack the examination was thankfully over. There was only a little poop on the healer's fingers when he pulled them out.
"It is over, my lord," The healer said as he wiped his hands on a cloth, "You are good for another year. Everything is fine."
"Good," Legolas said as he pulled his pants back up.
He was walking a little funny when we walked out of the infirmary.
"Thank the Valar," he thought, " That I do not have to have that done for another year It is such a pain in the ass."