Owen sat down on the bench in front of the hospital. Still in shock. He had not had a panic attack, and given the circumstances, those were good news. Not so good was the pressure he was feeling in his chest. Neither were the racing heart and the lump in his throat.

He had a child, a 2 year-old child, and he didn't know how to feel about it. He thought about the picture. A red-haired boy, so similar to his own pictures… he would get a paternity test, of course, but really, looking at him, there were not many doubts. And he couldn't help a smirk… he was a father… and didn't have a clue on how to begin.

And then his smile froze, and the lump in his stomach became tighter. How was he going to break the news to Cristina? Hell, he wanted to be part of his child's life, but what was Cristina going to think? He knew she was not especially child-oriented. And would she feel threatened by Megan? Of course, he knew she shouldn't; that he didn't really feel anything for Megan, except, maybe, some guilt. Guilt for having led her to believe she was more than a friend and a release to forget. Guilt for not having cared enough about her, and for not having even once called her to know how she was doing. She might have told him about Eric if he had ever called. It should have been difficult for her to take care of a child on her own… and specially knowing that she cared about him. God, what a mess! What would Cristina feel? In her place he would be jealous knowing that a man would be always part of her life. Of course, being a woman had the advantage of positively knowing if you had a child…so, no surprises there.

He had been avoiding both of them during the day. And both for the same reason. He didn't know what to tell any of them. Worst thing, they were probably together in the OR. Of all the general surgeons in town the new attending; the latest of Cristina's mentors had to be an ex-affaire of his. And the mother of his child… He was definitely getting a headache.

Even with his head buried in his hands he felt her arrive and sit by his side. In the last couple of months he had developed a six sense to feel her presence. Maybe he was getting to know her footsteps, or her scent. But he knew it was her sitting at his side.

"Hey, rough day?" She asked quietly.

"Cristina…"

"What's wrong? You've been avoiding me the whole day. Spill it up. Is it Dr. Miller?" her patience a little lost

"Got a child" He said, looking ahead. He didn't even dare looking at her.

"What!?"

"She just told me yesterday evening… I had told you about the affair, but never knew that there had been consequences…"

She remained silent staring at the infinite. He stared at her, holding his breath.

"Cristina,… I'm so sorry…"

"Why?" She asked staring at him

"Why what?" He replied a little confused.

"Why are you sorry?" She elaborated

"Well, we've been through so much already… and now this..." he continued still the apology ringing in his voice.

"Are you expecting me to change diapers?" She asked frowning.

"Of course not… besides, he is 2 years old… surely potty trained."

"And are you expecting me to babysit?" Or to give up my job to take care of him?"

"No.. but" still a little confusion in his voice

"Then, why are you sorry?"

"Do not really know" He said after some seconds of thought, frowning "I mean, it has been a surprise, and wow, I'm overwhelmed, but I'm not really sorry, about Eric himself. But this is huge. Its forever"

"Yes, it's huge, and forever... you will have to take care of a lot of things, and I bet you are scared to death, but do not apologize to me. Is actually not much of my business." She said with half a smile while taking his hand in hers. He stared at her, speechless; feeling his chest expand with relief. What an amazing, logical woman she was. She did not complain, did not blame him, was not scared of him having new responsibilities.

"Of course, I would be extremely mad if as a consequence you had decided to break up with me and go back to her… but you are not thinking about anything like that, are you?" She continued with her eyes opening a little wider. And for the first time he felt her hand tense in his.

"Cristina, look at me. I need you to understand this." And he paused staring in her beautiful brown eyes. He took their joined hands to his mouth and kissed hers. "I love you. So much that it sometimes hurts. There is nothing in this world that can change this. And will never willingly break up with you. With Megan it was just circumstantial, so, there is no way in hell I am going to leave you and go back to her. I will be here as long as you want me… my biggest fear is that one day you will wake up and realize how flawed I am, and then be gone"

She stared at him for some seconds, her lips slightly curving up, hinting a smile. And then, without forewarning, she took his face in her hands and kissed him.

"I love you Owen", she said with her forehead leaning against his. "If you want me to go, you will have to leave me, because I'm not going anywhere. And you will need a better excuse than an unknown child"

For a while they just remained seated, silently holding hands and staring at the end of the parking lot.

"You know, this could be a good thing" She started, with some hesitation in her voice, still staring at the end of the parking lot.

He turned to look at her, wondering, but allowing her space to continue at her own pace.

"Do not know how much you've heard from hospital gossip… is the problem of dating the only Doctor in house that doesn't do gossip…" she continued after seeing that he wondered what she meant "but everyone in this hospital knows that I was engaged once to an attending in. I also have a past, you know" she said with a faint smile.

She could read the surprise in his expressive face, but still he did not say anything, just pressed her hand a little, encouraging.

"Well, it's a long story, and the details are not really relevant, but what is relevant is that I got pregnant once back then. While wondering if having it or not, my fallopian tube exploded. It was an ectopic"

"I'm sorry, he said" He could read a faint shadow of hurt in her eyes.

"It's OK, it was a long time ago, and I really never thought I wanted children. What I know is that having lost a fallopian tube, it might be difficult for me to have children. Not impossible, but no guarantees, either."

He passed an arm around her shoulders and pulled her to his arms, kissing the top of her head while holding her tight.

"Owen, I'm not complaining or feeling bad right now, have never even been sure to want children" she smiled "what I wanted to say, is that I know you will be a great dad, and that I have been afraid that the thought of not having children might drive you away from me some day… so, it might be good, that even if we never get children, you can be a father. I wouldn't feel like failing you…"

He did not allowed her to finish, taking her in his arms and kissing her fiercely, touched by her generosity, but slightly annoyed at her lack of trust.

"You are wonderful, you now" he said, making her smile "I will love having children with you someday… but if for some reason we couldn't I would be perfectly happy with you, Eric or no Eric… if you want me to leave, you'd better find a better excuse to push me away" he continued giving her own words back to her.

They were still sitting with their foreheads together, when his pager went off… and then, seconds later hers… "911" he said, already standing up, and extending his hand to help her rise.

"Let's hope for something really gore to cheer us up" she said with a big smile, making him laugh and kiss her before entering the building.

***************

Two days later they were staring through the corridor window of the hospital nursery, his hand holding hers tightly. She could feel his uncertainty in his body. Even she was a little nervous.

"I don't know what to tell him Cristina… what if he hates me? Or if I traumatize him…"

Her lips curved up at his uncertainty.

"He's 2 years old Owen… barely speaking, so, do not think he will be expecting a big speech or that he will even understand what's going on. At most he will understand that he has a father, as most children, and he will be happy and cared about."

They saw Dr. Miller arrive, and felt her nervousness as she apologized for the delay. "Owen, even if I did explain to him yesterday that he was going to meet you, I would like 2 minutes to remind him, and tell him to relax, OK?"

"Sure" he replied, also a little tense around her. After a couple of days, a paternity test, and getting used to the idea of being a father, he could not help being mad at her… She had stolen him the first 2 years of his life. His first steps, his first words… and he would never be able to get those back. It was unfair for him and also for Eric. He turned his back at her and looked through the window again. His arms crossed firmly before his chest.

"Relax" Cristina whispered after seeing M enter the nursery. "Everything is going to be fine"

She felt his arm relax under her hand. He stared in her eyes intently and just said. "Marry me, Cristina Yang". He saw her eyes widen with surprise, and continued with a small peck in her lips "you do not have to answer right now… just think about it"… and with a last kiss and a smile he left her to enter the nursery.