Title: Le Cauchemar de Lily
Rating: M
Pairings: Wolfstar
Warnings: graphic depictions of violence
"Et tandis que mon cœur a brûlé, je pleurais. Je sois seul pour l'éternité, parce que mon amoureux a dévoré par le bête. La bête qui avait été mon amie. La bête derrière le visage humain. La bête dans Remus. Où était Remus le masque, et le bête était Remus? Je ne le sais plus."
(translation:"And while my heart burned, I cried. I will be alone for eternity, because my lover has been devoured by the beast. The beast who had been my friend. The beast behind the human face. The beast in Remus. Or was Remus the mask, and was the beast Remus? I don't know anymore.")
Lily put her pen down, sighing. Sitting in the common room in the middle of the night, she truly didn't know anymore.
Her mind flashed back to the nightmare that had woken her up. It had been absolutely terrible. One moment, they'd been laughing about some prank the four boys had pulled, and the next, Remus had turned into a huge, slavering beast, lunging at her.
That wouldn't have been so bad. No, stupid dream-James had to go and jump in between the angry werewolf and her face, leading to him getting mauled.
The last thing she remembered was kneeling over his dead, broken body while the beast loomed over her from behind. She shivered again, thinking about it. Somewhere out there, a feral beast might be roaming the grounds of Hogwarts.
At that moment, an agonized howl reverberated through the castle. A tear trailed down her face, landing on the diary and smearing the ink. She huddled a little deeper under the maroon blanket she'd nicked from James's empty dorm, staunchly avoiding looking through the window.
Exhausted, she eventually fell into a troubled sleep.
-o-o-o-O-o-o-o-
Someone was shaking her shoulder. Lily groaned, burrowing deeper under the blanket. She didn't want to face the world just yet.
"Lily, you've got to wake up," a hoarse voice quietly said. Reluctantly, she opened her eyes, and came face to face with Remus.
She couldn't help it; she screamed, throwing the blanket away and darting up the stairs, leaving a befuddled Remus standing next to the couch.
-o-o-o-O-o-o-o-
Her roommates had tried to get her to open up, but she just curled up underneath the sheets, wrapping her arms around herself. After a few hours, she finally felt alive enough to leave her bed. On shaking legs, she walked to the bathroom, splashing some water onto her face. When she looked up into the mirror above the sink, she screamed, before realizing her roommate's fur-lined towel was no beast.
She got dressed quickly, not bothering to add personal touches to the school uniform like she normally did, before tentatively walking down the stairs.
When she looked into the common room, she gulped. James was standing in front of her, disappointment and anger evident on his face. She got a glimpse of Sirius, Remus in his arms and a livid expression on his face, before she quickly lowered her eyes to the floor.
"So," said James, "since the common room is convenientlyempty, would you care to explain?"
"Um, explain? I mean, what do you- what do I have to-" she stuttered.
"Maybe why you left this laying around?!" Sirius furiously shouted, throwing her diary at her. James caught it before it could hit her in the face, allowing her to see that the spine was torn apart, pages hanging out by mere threads.
"Who did that?!" she demanded, balling her fists. They had no right!
"Who did that?!" Sirius incredulously echoed, voice overly loud.
"Yes?" Lily uncertainly said. "I mean, it's my- it's my diary! What in the world did you- Uh, why did you- what does it- did you read it? You didn't, did you?"
"We read it," Remus quietly said, tone completely flat.
Lily felt her body stiffen, reacting instinctively as she saw James and Sirius tense up, the latter holding Remus more tightly.
Not to comfort, but to restrain.
She took a step back, her back hitting the wall. Immediately, she knew it was the wrong thing to do. Remus's eyes glowed yellow. He jerked his arms free, revealing long claws.
Lily screamed, looking around her. James had backed off to the side, looking at her with empty eyes before turning into a stag.
Sirius tried to hold on, but was soon forced to turn into a dog when Remus- no, the beast – snarled at him, baring long fangs. Lily fumbled for her wand, before realizing she'd left it on her nightstand.
She sucked in a sharp breath. This was how she died.
The beast seemed to struggle with something for a moment, before leaping forward, grabbing both of her hands and pinning them above her head. She could feel sharp claws digging into her skin, most likely drawing blood. That theory was confirmed when the beast sniffed, baring its teeth in a frightening imitation of a grin.
Slowly, it leaned in, licking the blood off her wrists.
"We tried, you know," it growled, the deep, raspy voice almost unrecognizable. "But to think that I would ever hurt my pack…" It snarled, digging its claws deeper into her wrists. "That is unforgivable."
She tried to look past the yellow eyes of the beast, so out of place in Remus's face. But then, this was Remus.
It would seem she had her answer.
"James! Sirius! Please, I'll do anything, please don't let me die here, please!" she rambled, but the stag just shook its head while the dog growled at her, as if to say they deferred to their Alpha's judgement.
"Now, what shall I do to you, pretty little flower? You'd make a fierce wolf, and Prongs did request I spare you if possible…"
"Please, please don't hurt me…" Lily babbled. The beast bared its teeth, leaning in. When Lily realized it was going to turn her, she started struggling against its hold.
"No! Let me go, you monster!"
"Shut up," the beast commanded, licking from the base of her neck to her chin. She went immobile with fear.
"Prongs!" it snapped. At once, James turned back, bowing his head low and approaching to a respectful distance.
"Alpha?" he questioned, keeping his eyes directed at the ground. The beast let out a pleased rumble.
"Do you wish for her to be your mate?" the beast asked.
James did not look up as he said:
"I would prefer not to take her as my mate. She has grievously insulted our pack. However, if you want me to take her, I will, Alpha."
The beast's eyes softened, green flecks entering them.
"I would never force you to take a mate, James." James nodded, walking backwards with his head still bowed.
"Mate."
Sirius turned back into his human form. Unlike James, he did not bow his head, but didn't make direct eye contact for too long either.
"Do you want me to spare her, mate?"
Sirius looked slightly surprised at being asked. The beast must have seen that, because it chuckled.
"Come here, mate." With one arm, it kept Lily docile against the wall. The other, it extended toward Sirius, who immediately walked over, baring his throat before nestling into the beast's embrace.
"Oh, Sirius," whispered the beast, its voice sounding like Remus's. Lily felt the claws shrink back into the beast's fingers. "My Beta. My mate."
"My alpha. My mate," whispered Sirius, leaning forward but not touching his lips to the beast's. The beast leaned in, closing the distance and claiming Sirius.
"Remus?" Lily tentatively asked when it appeared to have forgotten her. Maybe if she pretended, it would let her go long enough to escape…
"Yes?" it said disinterestedly, turning back to her. All signs of the beast had receded.
"Is it really you?" Lily whispered, not daring to hope.
It laughed.
"Of course it is. Who else would it be?" Its eyes turned yellow again. "What, did you think that wasn't me?" It traced the edge of one claw along her cheek, before releasing her. In one smooth movement the beast – or should she say Remus, because she now knew they were one and the same – pulled out its wand, pointing it at her.
"Obliviate!"