"Chef, you have a phone call from Sauma"

"Take a message" Makoto said annoyed as she finished searing the steak.

"I tried, he insisted it was important" The new cook said meekly.

Makoto growled as she offered the pan to the cook "Finish this up, it is almost done." She went into the little office and abruptly spoke into the phone "What it is, we are still in the dinner rush, how would you feel if I called during happy hour?"

"I know and I would not have called if I didn't think it was important. One of your friends came in, she is completely drunk."

"What, who?" Makoto said all annoyance gone from her voice.

"The blue haired one. I didn't know she was such a lightweight. And she is talking nonsense, going on about what is the point and being a princess and having to give up everything she worked for anyways. I got concerned and I know you two are friends."

"I'll be right over, if she wants more to drink water it down, just keep her there till I arrive." She walked back into the kitchen "I have to leave; you all can handle this, Mimi you are in charge. We are already starting to wind down for the night." She left barely worried about her kitchen, but completely worried about her friend.

Ami had her head on the bar looking through her glass of sake sitting next to her. She was mumbling "why should I even try? I'll just end up in crystal Tokyo when I'm done here, No longer a doctor just a soldier."

"Ami, I think it's time to go home, come on lets go."

Ami looked up into her friends face "why? Go home, stay here, I'm still going to end up there. Nothing I do is going to change that."

The bartender looked at Makoto and gestured to Ami clearly saying "see what I mean". "Thank you for the call, I will get her home safely and try to fix everything." Makoto settled the bill leaving an extra-large tip for the inconvenience. "Come on" Makoto said lifting Ami's arm.

Ami stubbornly pulled her arm away and turned to the bartender "No, I'm staying here. Another drink."

Makoto took a deep breath and picked Ami up, cradling her in her arms. Ami collapsed into Makoto's arms and started crying into the bigger woman's shoulder completely defeated. "It's okay Ami, I have you. Everything will be okay."

The drive home had been a silent one except the occasional sniffle from Ami. "Are you going to be able to walk" Makoto asked.

"Of course I can." Ami said stubbornly as she got out of the car and her legs collapsed under her.

Makoto got to the other side of the car quickly and picked the woman up again. "I think it is easier this way." She fumbled with her keys as she carried her to the apartment. By the door she found the blue key and let them in, with Ami leaning heavily on her. Makoto led Ami to the couch and laid her on it then went back to lock the door and turn on the lights. Makoto sat on the coffee table to get a better look at her friend sprawled on the couch "Okay, I let you keep to yourself the whole drive but now it is time to talk about this, what happened."

Ami looked over to her "Nothing happened."

Makoto let out a little disbelieving laugh "right, you just got so drunk you cannot even walk because that's what you do?"

"Yes" Ami said defiantly.

"No you don't. You are a fighter, and this is not fighting. This is wallowing. Now what is this all about?"

Ami smiled and lifted her arms making a show to present herself "It's the new me. I'm going to drink my way to the silver millennium."

Makoto looked at her friend trying to read any signs she could find, but found nothing. "You were working today right? Did something happen at the hospital?"

"I quit." Ami said shortly.

All the color left Makoto's face "What? But you worked so hard to get there. Why would you quit?"

"I'm not a great doctor, the hospital will be fine without me and I have to leave it eventually. You are going to leave your restaurant you worked so hard for. Usagi is lucky all she wants is Mamaru and when all is said and done she gets to keep him. I'm just getting a head start."

Makoto sat thinking, going over the words her friends just said then it hit her. "Why would you say you are not a great doctor?"

Ami laughed harshly "Because I'm not."

"You are, you have done great work in the hospital. You have saved so many people. People are alive today because of you. That is important, and you are good at it."

Ami's harsh laugh came again but this time more angry. "Makoto you think I'm a great doctor because that's what you want me to be. Simply put, I'm not good enough."

Makoto looked shocked "I never said I wanted you to be a doctor, you said that. And I supported you, all our friends supported you because it was what you wanted."

There was disgust in her voice as Ami said "Well I was a doctor, mission accomplished. But just because you are a doctor does not mean you are good at it."

Tears of understanding started to form at the corners of Makoto's eyes and she whispered "You lost someone today."

Ami turned away towards the back of the couch and the silent sobs came back. She could not hide behind anger or resentment anymore, no excuses to deflect to, it was right there, spoken out loud. Someone died today and she did not stop it, a trained doctor, and she could not do what she spent her whole life preparing for. She was a failure. Through her tears Makoto's voice cracked "Oh Ami, You cannot save everyone. I'm sure you did your best."

"My best was not good enough. They still died."

Makoto looked at her friend's shoulders shaking from her tears, she took a deep breath and hugged Ami's back "Ami, you cannot save everyone, even doing everything perfectly it is impossible to save everyone. You fight death as a sailor soldier and as a doctor. Your nemesis is death and sometimes death wins but you always put up a good fight. You cannot quit, you lost a battle and it was hard. But are you going to give up on the whole war? Let Death have complete victory? Or are you going to fight death every day?" The two women sat in silence for a while before Makoto spoke again "You told me last week you saved a toddler. That toddler now gets to become a child, then a teen, and on to an adult, because of you. That life had just barely gotten started and it almost ended there, but you, amazing you, fought and saved her. She has a future because of you, keep giving people their futures. Please."

Ami rolled over and hugged Makoto back silently shaking till the shaking stopped. Makoto eased her hug to discover Ami had fallen asleep. "Oh, sweet Ami, you do so much more good than you know." Makoto picked her up and took her into the bedroom laying her on the bed. Makoto grabbed a spare blanket and went to the couch. She would be there for Ami in the morning.