Author's Note: This is my entry to the February contest of the DBZ Fanfiction club on DeviantArt. The challenge was to write a drabble (less than 500 words) about a DBZ character with the theme disappointment, which you could use in any way you like. I chose Gohan.

Disclaimer: DBZ belongs to Akira Toriyama and Toei Animation.

Always a Let-Down

Nothing had changed. All his life he'd watched. Watched his friends fight and die. Protecting him. He'd had the power to help. He'd had it. And he'd just frozen in fear.

And whenever his mind had snapped as he could feel their agony crushing his heart, and his hidden power surfaced to save them – he still found himself able to let them down. He'd give their spirits a boost, get their hopes up, and in the end, they always found his power faded and they were on their own to ensure both theirs and his survival.

They'd always been nice about it. "You're just a kid, it's amazing you're as far as you are, I wouldn't have been able to do that when I was your age." Lies to sooth a painful truth.

But then it had happened. He'd refused Cell the fight he desired, and the biological android had combined the cunning of Vegeta and the sadism of Frieza to form the ultimate strategy to lure out his true potential and force him to harness the one thing he feared the most.

He'd stood before the monster as a superior. A predator. A saiyan fed by human hatred. It was the most overpowering sensation he'd ever experienced and he'd felt like he controlled the world. Like he could dictate Cell's course of action. But his power had controlled him.

In the end, he had still been a let-down. He'd given everything he had to fix the damage done, to undo every wrong he'd committed by his negligence – but for what?

"I killed you, dad. I killed you."

Fresh tears cascaded from his obsidian eyes and they dripped desperately into the wild current of the river his father had once saved him from.

Whole his life, he'd been a disappointment. It didn't matter if he faced a threat or was shielded from one – he'd always end up causing anguish to the friends he cherished.

Krillin, Piccolo, his father himself… they'd all assured him he couldn't know what would have happened had he been able to control the hatred that pushed his power past its limitations.

But he knew one thing – had his father lived through the Cell Games, he would not have chosen to leave earth or die intentionally. He would not have told them he attracted trouble and that it would be best if he left or died even though peace had returned.

Gohan had been shielded once again. His father must have thought that his son needed peace because he couldn't handle himself in a fight either way, and that the slim chance that villains did seek him out would lead them nowhere, because Son Goku had gone.

"Always a let-down."

His voice echoed into the river. There was nothing he could do right.