DISCLAIMER: Really, if I owned DGM, I wouldn't be writing fanfics and Kanda and Allen would not be OOC.
AN: This is (more than loosely) based off of another fic called Innocent Insanity by KIS'E'productions. It's not exactly stealing, but go read hers. It's much much better than mine.
That first night, 29 days, 2 hours and 17 minutes ago (it's not like he was counting), Kanda had gone to the Exorcists' bathroom to take a shower. When he walked in, he heard running water and moaning coming from a shower stall. It was moaning he'd only heard like that in his dreams that left him dirty sheets and a strong blush. But for some reason, the real thing just seemed so much more erotic.
Kanda didn't know how it happened, but he found himself in Allen's shower with lips pressed against his neck. No time was wasted getting Kanda's wet clothes off. And the first time hurt like hell. But to Kanda, the pain was worth seeing the few seconds of pure bliss that spread across Allen's face as he came.
For a few minutes, there was silence except for the still-warm shower running. It was Allen who broke the silence.
"Kanda, you know this is just a one time thing, right?" Allen asked. Kanda grunted in reply. They left the bathroom without looking at each other and left for their rooms without glancing back. Or at least Allen did.
Apparently, their one night stand wasn't only one night. Allen sought him out again the next night. And the next night, then the morning after that, then after lunch. Kanda and Allen soon built a relationship- purely physical, of course.
It was during their 19th time that Kanda found out who Allen thought about when he was thrusting into Kanda. And shit, the person wasn't even the same gender as he was!
But really, what hurt more than anything was that it was someone he cared about. When Allen had shouted Lenalee's name Kanda felt his heart stop for a moment. And as Allen slept he stroked Kanda's long dark hair, murmuring her name, Kanda wished he couldn't hear, wished it was him on Allen's mind.
The day Lenalee and Lavi started going out, Allen was a lot rougher with Kanda than he normally was. After their harsh sex, Allen had collapsed on Kanda and cried. Kanda listened to him, rubbed his back, held him, and cradled him as he cried. But in a way, Kanda enjoyed it. He enjoyed having Allen in his arms, the warmth, and the way they just fit together.
"I hope you never fall in love Kanda, because it'll kill you one day," Allen said bitterly. His voice was slightly hoarse and rough from his crying.
"Tche. Moyashi, if that's really what you think then why don't you just fall out of love with Lenalee?" Kanda snapped.
"BaKanda! If it were that easy, I'd have done it long ago. Not that you'd know. You've never been in love, you insensitive git." His originally harsh voice softened with his next words. "If it isn't Lenalee, it isn't good."
So Kanda went around, borrowing things from Lenalee and Miranda and the other females at the Black Order and spent his days holed up in his room. Not even Lavi or Allen could get in and absolutely no one knew what he was doing. The only time Kanda ever went out was to eat his meals of soba and tea.
Allen hadn't had sex in a few days and was starting to get pissed with Kanda. So that night, after his dinner (always enough to feed more than 20 people, not that Kanda would know), Allen went to his room and was met with the biggest surprise of his life.
Kanda was sitting on Allen's bed, back perfectly straight, legs crossed like a girl. But no, the most incredible part was that he was wearing a female Exorcist uniform, with the little skirt and all (and lacy underwear), wearing heeled boots like Lenalee's, eyeliner and lip-gloss, and hair up in pigtails.
Kanda stood up and glided smoothly over to Allen.
"K-Kanda?" Allen choked out.
"Hmph," was the girly reply.
And for once, Kanda initiated the sex.
And Allen? God, he was in heaven. Because like this he could actually make himself believe this was her, that she was with him.
Allen made Kanda cum four times, and he himself had his strongest orgasm ever. The post-coital high lasted nearly an hour. But as Kanda got up to leave, Allen called out after him.
"Stay. Please stay, Lenalee."
Kanda felt his throat constrict. He turned around anyway and walked back to Allen's bed and lay down.
Allen had never been happier and quickly fell asleep. But Kanda stayed awake, not wanting to miss a moment. He slowly and quietly got out of the bed, wiped off his make-up, shed the clothes Allen had refused to let him take off and then quietly lay back down next to Allen.
Kanda wondered if Allen knew how good he smelled; the smell of honey and mint and something that was indescribably Allen. He never wanted to move, his face buried in Allen's neck. Soft, silvery white hair tickled his face. He could feel Allen's heart beating, their bare chests touching. Kanda moved his hand and traced all of the small body. Allen sighed in his sleep as Kanda stroked his hair.
"I love you Lenalee," Allen whispered in his sleep, a gentle smile on his face.
Kanda's ice-cold heart, which had been melted by the one next to him, shattered into a million pieces.
He couldn't breathe. His throat had closed up, and he felt like he'd been plunged into a tub of ice, and his chest felt hollow and tight, panging with longing.
Jaw clenched, Kanda got out of the bed and told himself that he would never touch Allen again. But that resolve shattered when he saw Allen sprawled out, the moonlight making him glow.
Kanda couldn't help but crouch by the bed. He cradled Allen's face and brought his face closer, their lips almost touching. Then, Kanda kissed someone for the first time in his life. His first kiss. Their first kiss.
"I'm so sorry that I love you, Allen. Goodbye."
A single tear that was not his own dripped down Allen's face.
Lenalee and Lavi as a couple only lasted a few months. A year later, Allen finally gathered his courage and confessed to Lenalee. They'd been going out for a while now. Allen had completely forgotten his little tryst with Kanda, and they rarely crossed paths. But Kanda remembered, thought of it every night, craved.
And sometimes, Allen swore that when he woke up there was a tear on his face and the faintest trace of tea on his lips.
AN: AAAAHHHH! I'm going to die! This is my first fic. So review people! And yes, Kanda just walked out of Allen's room naked… Ah! And those days holed up in his room, Kanda was practicing walking in heels and a skirt and putting on make-up. And YES I KNOW I STOLE A LOT FROM KIS'E'productions! *meek voice* Sorry. But please! Review anyways and tell a first time authoress what she's done wrong (or right)! Thanks! (or at least to those who review…)
~ Midnight Tea