Hello my little souls! So it's been a long while since I've wrote anything, but this was a spur of the moment. Listen to "Kiss It All Better" by He Is We (Either before or while reading) to get the real feel of this short one-shot. (Ow^) also, I suggest grabbing a tissue or two, because it is kinda sad... (w)
I sit in my cell. The smell of blood fills my head, making my stomach churn and my head spin in circles. I cover my head and close my eyes, trying to forget. Trying to let go. Yet, no matter how many days pass, how many moons light my cell, I can still remember it all. All too well, all too soon; all my fault.
I see the gleam of the blade, red and black lines crisscrossed with blood. The stench is so strong, but I resist the urge to cough up whatever I ate before. Although, I can't remember when I last ate. I couldn't remember why I was out in the middle of the street. Couldn't remember why my arm had changed from sun-kissed skin to a blade of a scythe, the memorizing zigzag pattern hurting my eyes. Hurting my pounding head, my bruised limbs, my aching ribs; none of which I could remember how I got this way.
I closed my eyes, trying to stop everything from spinning, but the soft gasp of breath stopped me. It sounded all too familiar, all too close, and when I looked down in my lap, I couldn't help but let my world spin more, round and round until it spiraled out of control. The strength in me cowered away in me. I was a coward and ran away from to leave me like this. Leaving me with the feeling of my world crashing around me when I saw her.
In my arms, the bleeding love of my life. She shakes, the brightness in her eyes dimmed with pain and fear. Yet, she looks up at me with such a graced smile, my tears splashing down upon her smooth cheek, so much different from the shredded skin of her chest, my scythe torn completely through such beauty. I shake uncontrollably, my words choking my throat as I find it hard to even breathe. I can't help but cry out her name, holding her closer as if to swallow her pain away for her. So beautiful, so young, she realizes she's not ready. I'm not ready. Neither of us are ready. So, she begins to cry.
"Kiss it all better… I'm not ready to go." Sobbing uncontrollably, my hands upon her chest to stop the pain, to hold back her precious life from seeping out. So much. It slides through my fingers warm, my stomach knotting again and again painfully. She sees right through me; through my eyes, my heart, my soul. Like a book, she reads my thoughts and realizes, even through all her pain, my own.
"It's not your fault love. You didn't know… you didn't know." I shout out her name, the only word I'm capable of forming into audible sound. Slowly, painfully, she reaches her soul out to mine, her hands reaching to my cheeks. The warmth of her small hands, the ones I loved to caress and kiss when in solitude. The hands that held me, guided me, loved me, they were all too cold. Looking down at her from the touch, I shared my warmth with her as much as I could. My lips met hers, then her cheeks, her eyes, her hair, and then her lips again only to repeat it again and again. In between each, I cooed lies that eased our souls, but slowly tore mine apart.
"Everything… Will be alright..." Such lies, how could I? Looking down upon my arm, my traitorous arm, I heard mad laughter and felt my rage grow inside. Around me, names were cried out and footsteps pounded around. They were coming for me, but I couldn't leave her. Not after what I did to her. Not after I stole away something beautiful from this world, from their lives and from mine.
I could hear him, calling me, beckoning me to finish the job, to end her misery. To finish what I started and to continue on, the little Oni fueling my rage and taunting me with lies. Telling me the ones around me are here to cause her pain, to take me away from her forever. Yet, through his pointed teeth, the lies he whispered in my ear were nothing. I knew the facts, and I knew who was to blame. I know who doesn't deserve to live, who deserves to lie there like her and deserve that pain. I know what I have done.
"I'll avenge my lover tonight!" Pulling away, running away as I tore my soul apart. Within my soul, war was raging. Memories were strained into needles, striking upon my soul. Our first meeting in the piano room strikes me. Winning the fight against Asura struck harder. Protecting her from Giriko within the book of Eibon slices through me. Our music that we made together shreds what's left of my soul. The kisses and laughs we shared turn those shreds to ashes till there's nothing left but darkness, madness, and an empty, dull pain. Somewhere far off, I still hear her crying out for me. She sounds so alone, so afraid, but not for her. I can feel it, for me.
"Kiss it all better… I'm… Not ready to go…" My vision blurs as I turn to her, red crossing my vision as a painful strike hits my head from someone I think I know, but his cries of anger are far off as I sway. Her eyes look at me with fear, but so much compassion that I feel my world freeze, her final words reaching through as I finally fall.
"It's… Not your fault love… You… Didn't know… Y-You… Didn't… know…"
Now I sit here, staring through the moonlit bars that cage me. My shattered soul shakes with every breath, painful with hatred and regret of myself still being here. They pulled me away from her; everyone that loved her and that once loved me. They locked me up, to protect themselves from me, watching me wither away into a pitiful animal, so broken that I can no longer control myself. So very lost, words no longer reach me; no longer make sense. Medicine is stripped of its miracles and leaves me to fall apart within this cell as the days, the months; the years pass by painfully slow.
I would trade all of it, their love, their words, my medicine, my life; I would trade it all to hold her in my eyes and within my arms. I couldn't bring her back with the same price upon me.
I couldn't help but laugh, louder and louder as I heard those soft footsteps. All it is, is a memory. She walks to me, love and sorrow filling her eyes as she looks upon my broken form, which made all the worse. All it is, is a memory as she whispers soothingly.
"Hey Hey…" And finally, I cry.
"Stay with me." She nods. "Until I fall asleep, stay with me." She sits beside me and smiles. "Stay with me, until I fall asleep…" I tense as I feel her hand upon my heart, the feeling so real, guiding me onto my back. "Stay with m-me..." She nods reassuringly again, laying her cheek against my heart and listening quietly. "Stay with me…" She closes her eyes, her hand reaching up and caressing my cheek. "Until I fall asleep, stay with me." Slowly, she opens my eyes and looks at me concerned, but then slowly smiles. "Stay with me." With so much warmth, she holds my face and looks at me happily. Everything goes silent and my world stops again, just her and I. She breathes upon my lips, the sensation small but welcoming as I close my eyes. "Until I fall asleep, stay with me."
"Kiss it all better," she says with a smile. "I'm not ready to go." I grin and walk to her, everything around us light and warm. She holds her arms out to me and she smiles with so much love, tears roll down her beautiful face. "It's not your fault love. You didn't know." I carry her into my arms, hugging her close to me and never letting go. "You didn't know Soul."
"Stay with me Maka. Until I fall asleep, stay with me." She kisses me softly, wiping away the tears upon my cheeks. I hold her closer, afraid. She laughs lightly, filling my soul with such warmth, I feel as if everything will be alright now.
"I will stay with you. Until you fall asleep, I will stay… Soul?" I kiss her lips softly, then rest my head against hers, humming curiously. "Stay with me until I fall asleep? Stay with me?" I nod, watching her eyes close as warmth wraps around us and I feel us finally slip away.
"Forever Maka, I will stay with you. Until you fall asleep, I will stay with you…"
T^T I don't know what I was thinking when I was writing this... Maybe I just felt like crying...? xD I was constantly listening to "Kiss It All Better" by He Is We and I was neglecting my FanFictions, so I decided in the middle of night, I decided to feel like bawling and writing this one shot. I hope you like it and I love any reviews. I also don't mind suggestions on any topics to write about for SoulXMaka, so send me a note if you do. ;3
~soulfullySoulful