Disclaimer: Not Mine, Don't Own A Thing.
"You call this 'fine dining', darling?
Hermione stifled a giggle. "This is the highest rated Japanese restaurant in England—the finest of Muggle dining!"
Draco scowled, looking very much like the angry, young boy she had once punched. She took her napkin from her place and, unfolding it, placed it into her lap.
"Exactly how am I supposed to eat with sticks? Do I have to club my food over the head before I eat it? Will I be forced to grill it over an open flame?"
"Draco, shush!" she whispered harshly, as the server approached.
The server went through her spiel, telling them the specials of the day and their daily sushi roll offerings. Draco looked more and more annoyed as the speech progressed. Finally, he interrupted the server, demanded a glass of sparkling water, and dismissed the disgruntled server with a wave of his finely manicured hand.
"What is wrong with you, Draco? As much as I disagree with your parents on most things, I can at least admit that they did raise you with impeccable manners. I can't believe how you're acting!"
"Hermione, I've done everything I can to make you happy. I've gone to shopping centers, and carnivals, and the cinema just to make you happy. You're Muggle, and I get it, and I love you. But, please, don't make me eat with sticks. It's just too much. She spouted off about sushi and sashimi and something called a yakitori stick. I don't know what she was talking about, I have no idea what I'm about to eat, and I swear that if I am forced to eat octopus, I will make a scene."
Hermione did her best to stifle the giggle that threatened to split her face in two. Her husband was having a full-blown hissy fit, and, while she knew that laughing would not help, she just couldn't help herself.
The peals of laughter that rang out attracted the attention of many of the patrons. Draco's normally pale visage flushed an angry puce.
"Hermione, will you please desist?"
Hermione lifted her glass of water, mumbling her apologies as she sipped. She averted her eyes, embarrassed at her lack of control.
A heavy silence separated them. Finally, Draco could no longer stand it.
"Damn it, where is my water!"
The server came at that moment, as all servers know to do when their attendants look angry. She placed his sparkling water before him.
"Can I offer you both some edamame? Or maybe a cucumber salad?"
Draco looked up at his wife and sighed. She looked so hopeful. And, if he had to eat with tiny sticks to make her happy, then he'd eat with tiny sticks.
"Madam, would you bring us one of everything on the menu?" Draco inquired, an innocent look on his features.
"But, sir, there are seventy-five different items on this menu!" the server sputtered.
"Then, we are definitely going to need some edamame and two cucumber salads while we wait."
The server looked at him blankly.
"Off you go," Draco dismissed her.
The server walked away, shaking her head and muttering under her breath.
"You do realize, Draco, that some of those dishes iwill/i include octopus, don't you?"
Draco grimaced, but quickly recovered. "Yes, my dear. Now show me how to use these chopsticks."
AN: This story was inspired by blue_paris' prompt: "*squeal* thank you! I would lurve a drabble *claps excitedly* how about... Draco has an encounter with Muggle fine dining =)"