Pillow Talk, a lupin iii fanfic

Disclaimer: I wish I did own Lupin III. I'd have some money honey! ^_^

A/N: This is my first Lupin fic. Probably won't be the last. It's shonen-ai, so if ya don't like it, you won't like this. I got this idea when Yotan kept poking me and asking me questions one night. Stupid muse…

Youji: ^_^

Arsene Lupin III had a problem. They had just liberated 50 million dollars from a drug lord and left him tied up for the police. Unfortunately, they lost all but a few hundreds to a nearby casino. Fujiko screamed at him, Goemon tried to kill him, and Jigen shot at him. It was a regular day as Lupin III.

But something was on his mind. It had been for a while. Or rather 'they', for it was a person that was hovering in Lupin's mind. He couldn't stop thinking about them for a good while now. It was driving him crazy. And he didn't even know when it started. All he knew was that it had and now he was losing his mind. All because of one:

Daisuke Jigen.

Lupin didn't really know when he stopped looking at Fujiko and started looking at the gunman, but he did. In fact, he couldn't remember the last time he made a pass at Fujiko. He didn't remember the last time he tried to touch her chest, look down her shirt or up her skirt. In fact, he was finding it hard to think of anytime he was being a pervert to Fujiko at all. All the images of her he previously kept in his mind were gone and there were only images of Jigen.

Jigen smoking in the corner.

Jigen drinking at the mini-bar.

Jigen aiming and shooting at something.

Jigen pushing his hat rim up and smiling. He liked that one.

Though he didn't know why. Lupin was confused. Was he attracted? Was that why he couldn't stop thinking about Jigen? Well, he did look good in that suit and he was cute when he smiled. He'd probably hate that though. ^_^ Good.

But what if Jigen wasn't attracted? He couldn't endanger their friendship over all this. But, he didn't know how long he would sit back and be silent. I mean, what if Jigen bent over again. Lupin might just jump him right there. Ew, what if he didn't feel the same after he did? Wouldn't that be embarrassing?

" Arg! This is so confusing! I need someone to talk to."

Lupin thought for a minute. Fujiko was in her own room next to theirs. She wouldn't be able to help. What would she know about love? She'd just tell him he was being hormonal or something. While he was, he didn't need to hear it from her right now.

Jigen was in the next room, but he obviously couldn't talk to him about his problem. Even if he tried that 'I've got this friend' routine, he'd see right through it. ^_^ Either that or look at Goemon the wrong way. Ne, he already pissed him off enough today. Best not risk an appendage by embarrassing him. He almost lost an arm coming back from the casino.

Lupin snapped his fingers. " That's it! I can talk to Goemon. Shonen ai isn't looked down on so much in Japan! He'd understand!"

Lupin grinned and jumped out of bed. He snuck off to the living room to go bother Goemon; who was sleeping on a futon on the floor.

*********************

Goemon was dreaming. Well, it was more of a nightmare. That dude from the SPAM commercials was chasing him around shouting 'More Spam!'. He had tried to force some spam on him earlier in the dream and he politely declined. Then the man seemed to just loose it at that and started chunking spam at him. It was obvious the man was insane, so he ran. This was where he was now.

" More SPAM!!!"

The man was a nut. But thankfully he was ripped from his dream when his senses picked up someone attempting to sneak into the room. His grip on Zantetsu tightened a little. Someone was trying to be quiet.

He spread his conscious out to get more information on whoever this was. They were stepping lightly and he could tell they weren't very big. No metal clanged as he moved so he had no weapon. And he reeked of bad cologne.

Wait.

He mentally ran through a list of familiar scents that were marked 'do not attack'.

Channel #5 = Fujiko

Cigarettes and booze = Jigen

Bad cologne = Lupin

Oh. It was just Lupin. Maybe he was getting something to eat. He didn't know. He didn't care. He was going back to sleep. If sun wasn't up yet, he wasn't required to be either. Lupin could gorge for all he cared.

**********************

Lupin carefully crept over to where Goemon was sleeping. He knew the samurai had known he was there. But he didn't know if Goemon knew he was a friendly and not intending to kill him. So he intentionally made a little noise as not to startle him into attacking.

When he got close enough he figured Goemon knew he wasn't going to harm him because he was sleeping and not trying to cut his head off. So he plopped down on the floor next to him. He expected him to wake up and ask what he was doing, but Goemon didn't move.

So Lupin poked him.

Goemon grunted, but did not awaken. So Lupin poked him again.

And again.

And-

" WHAT do you want?!" Goemon finally caught his hand before he could poke him again. Though his snap was a bit muffled by his pillow.

Lupin grinned as he released his hand." Are you awake Goemon?"

" No."

" Good, you're awake!" He jumped onto the futon; effectively sitting on Goemon in the process and eliciting an 'oof' from him. " I need to talk to you."

" Can this wait?" Again his response was muffled.

" It could, but I'm not sleepy and I need to talk to someone."

Goemon removed himself from under Lupin and rolled on his side. " Someone. Not me. Get out of my bed and go bother Jigen."

Lupin's face flushed." I…uh…can't do that exactly. He's what the talk is about."

" Good for him. Good night."

Lupin pouted and started poking him again. He figured he'd get annoyed enough with him to try to kill him and by then he'd be awake. And combine with his verbal prodding he had to wake up.

*Poke*

" Gooooooooeeemon?"

*Poke*

" Goooooooooeeemon?"

He shifted to get away from the incessant poking. " Go. Away. Lupin."

He ignored him." Goemon, have you ever been in love?"

" If I say yes, will you go away?"

" Sure."

" Then yes."

" Really? What was she like?!!"

He groaned and put his pillow over his head." You said you'd leave."

" Yeah, but I didn't say right away."

" You will not be satisfied until I have completely lost my mind will you?"

" I'll dump ice in your futon."

" Not if you don't have any arms. Now stop bugging me or I will make good on my promise to kill you."

Lupin thought for a minute. Then he shoved Goemon over and got under the covers with him. " Fine, then I'll just sleep with you." ^_^

He jumped from the bed like a snake bit him." Fine, we'll talk."

Lupin III snickered." I knew you'd see things my way."

******************

They now sat in the kitchen. Goemon was sitting at the table with his head on his arms. Lupin was getting something to drink for both of them. He got a bottle of water to give to Goemon. When the samurai took it angrily, he started to throw it at Lupin, but was too tired to actually exert the energy and just set it on the table.

Lupin grinned and sat down across from him. He poured himself some bourbon and held the glass in both hands. His grin faded when he sighed and looked up at Goemon. The samurai didn't move and seemed to be sleeping on the table. Lupin looked at the ice he had in his glass and then at him. His grin reappeared as he removed some ice from his glass and reached over to drop it on Goemon's back.

" You do and I'll make sure you're never able to produce Lupin IV."

Lupin froze and put the ice back. " You're no fun."

He grunted, but didn't move. Lupin swished the liquid in his glass for a while as trying to think of exactly what he was going to say. Words had never been a problem for him, but now they seemed to escape him.

" Say Goemon?"

" Nani?"

" If you had something to say, but you didn't know how to say it, what would you do?"

The samurai sighed and lifted his head from his pillow of his own arms and looked uncharacteristically lazily at him. " I would just spit it out Lupin. Say what I have to say and be done with it."

Lupin nodded and threw back the bourbon. He poured himself another and then looked up at Goemon again. " What if it were embarrassing?"

" What if it were embarrassing?" He shot back," If it's something that needs to be said, then say it. If you can live with yourself not saying it, then don't say it."

Lupin nodded again. Then he threw back another shot and poured another one. After throwing his third one down, he sighed. " I think I'm attracted to Jigen."

Needless to say, Goemon had to wipe away the water he had been drinking and ran the back of his hand over his mouth. He wasn't expecting that at all. He thought maybe he wanted to marry Fujiko or he was going to apologize or something. But certainly not that. " That certainly came out of the blue."

" Hit you hard, ne?" Lupin grinned.

" Hai, like a MACK truck."

Lupin sighed again and threw back another shot. " So what do you think I should do?"

" I suppose you should try and sort out your feelings on the matter before you make any rash decisions. I mean, there's still Fujiko. When did you get bored with her?"

He shrugged. " I have no damn idea. But it happened and now my eyes are wandering. I was even looking at you a few days ago."

Goemon nearly choked on his water again. Lupin burst out laughing and just about fell out of his chair. Goemon knew he was joking and glared at him. " Are you purposely trying to kill me?"

He shook his head. " Gomen nasai! I just couldn't help myself!"

He grumbled and threw his water bottle at Lupin. His face caught it and Lupin fell over and onto the floor. " Whoa-whoa-wah!"

Goemon pointed and laughed. Lupin climbed back up and pointed accusingly at the samurai. " You did that on purpose!"

" Gomen nasai. I just can't help myself."

" Dammit! That's not funny Goemon!!" Lupin slammed his hands on the table and continued to glare at him.

" Hey, what's all the noise about in here?"

Both of them looked up at Jigen in the doorway. He was just wearing boxers and Lupin was having a hard time getting his eyes to behave themselves. Goemon looked to Jigen then Lupin and stifled a snicker.

" Lupin couldn't sleep so he decided to risk death and bug me for the rest of the morning with his hormonal problems."

Goemon grinned cheekily at Lupin as the master thief sent him another glare that promised death. Jigen shrugged and went to help himself to Lupin's bourbon. Lupin turned an interesting shade of red and froze completely. Jigen took a seat next to him and threw back a shot.

" So what's the problem? Having dreams about Fujiko?"

Goemon shook his head. " Not exactly. His dreams have taken a different direct-mmph!"

Lupin covered the samurai's mouth and sitting on the table to keep him from saying anymore. " Don't you open your mouth you stupid samurai! You're going to ruin everything!"

Goemon rolled his eyes and moved to the side. Lupin fell forward and hit the floor headfirst. His body was sticking straight up while his head was shoved into the floor. Jigen looked confused. " Uh, say Goemon?"

Said samurai looked up innocently. " Hai?"

" Is there something wrong with Lupin?"

" You mean other than the usual?"

" Yeah."

He shook his head. " Uh uh. He's just floored by his emotions."

Lupin's body fell completely on the floor with a THUD. He twitched and groaned on the floor. " I hate you Goemon Ishikawa…"