I tried. I tried as hard as I...
Trying wouldn't keep us alive. Trying wouldn't save us from the new gods, deranged and corrupt, who sought to annihilate any rebellion. Trying was all we could do.
It's hopeless, Matt. He knows my name, maybe yours. And he knows our faces. We'll never..
Never? I promised I'd never leave you. That you would never get hurt. Or killed. I never imagined it would become this complicated. My mind was used to thinking quickly, analytically, visually. Video games aren't completely useless. I could watch over twenty five monitors at once. I could beat games before they were even legally released. But this wasn't a just a game anymore. I was playing with our lives, and there were no cheats, no escapes, no respawn.
Unless Mello played his part, recited his lines seamlessly, unless he could fool Kira himself, he was as good as dead. And so was I, because even if I could escape, even if I could run away, even if I could disguise myself and wait till the madness ended, I knew that as soon as Mello died, my life would cease as well.
I ran my hands through my short, whitish hair, itching my scalp as it tingled from the bleach. Straight up bleach, because Mello didn't want to spend unnecessary money. My ribs still ached from the kick I received when I asked him why it mattered, what can corpses buy anyways?
Maybe this is just like one of your games, Matt. Maybe we are just players, actors, avatars. Someone else is moving us, choosing whether we live or die. Damned if I know whether that's reassuring or horrifying. But whoever thinks he can control me can go to hell. I'm not a game piece and neither are you. This will work. We will survive this, Matt. I swear to you, we will.