Title: Trust me
Rating: 18
Summary: It's such a simple request but can John do it?
Featuring: Evan/John
Warning: D/s, hurt/comfort
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters/people of WWE. No copyright or trademark infringement is intended and no money is being made.
Notes: This is past of the same 'verse as Comforting touch but is a stand alone fic. As always this is unbeta'd so any mistakes you find, please, please, please forgive (I mean it PLEASE!)
X x x x x x x x x
"I…I can't," stammered John, pulling back slightly, his face burning red.
He hated the way Evan calmly stared up at him almost as if the smaller man wasn't surprised. He hated the way the soft brown eye seemed to glow with compassion as he continued to move away from the embrace they had been sharing. He didn't want compassion. He didn't need compassion. He didn't need anything. He closed his eyes trying to block out the sight but it didn't do any good. In many ways it made it worse – not being able to see Evan made him feel more alone than he had in months.
He also hated the fact that Evan didn't react. The smaller man simply lay there seemingly content to let John do all the retreating. He just lay there propped up on his elbows staring at him, a soft understanding smile curling his lips. John tried to control his breathing but the harder he tried the more desperate his gulps for air became. He gave a very unmanly whimper as a hand brushed his side, the touch sending him shuffling backwards until he end up standing at the foot of the bed staring down in growing embarrassment and horror at the way Evan seemed to calmly accepting his apparent breakdown.
Gulping down the growing panic, John risked looking Evan in the eye for the briefest of moments before he had to look away, self-loathing burning his throat as he murmured, "I'm sorry."
"Nothing to apologise for," reassured Evan gently, his smile growing into a warm grin as he spoke.
"Yes there is!" snapped John running a hand over his shorn hair, "I...I said I'd...I'd do ...this…" he waived his hand in the vague direction of the bed Evan was lounging on, adding bitterly, "I can't do anything right!" He gave a low growl of annoyance and aimed a kick at the foot of the bed. The impact made the bed shake and his foot flare in pain.
"Don't do that."
That single softly spoken command cause John to freeze. He blinked very slowly as if his mind wasn't totally in control of his body. Moving as if in a dream he turned and found Evan was sitting on the edge of the bed starting at him a strange look plastered over the normally relaxed features.
"Stop trying so hard."
John shook his head and opened his mouth to speak but Evan beat him to it adding, "You're being too hard on yourself. As usual. Do you want me to make this simple for you?" he stood up gracefully, the compact body moving with a fluidly that had John drooling despite his confused state.
"I can make this so simple," soothed Evan offering John a comforting smile, "Would you like that? Do you want me to make it simple for you, darling?"
John gave a little gasp at the endearment. No one had ever called him that before. It was always him having to use endearments, always him who had to call the shot, always him who had to make the decisions.
"Well?"
The softly spoken question broke through his thoughts and without realising it he gave a slight nod.
The smile that flood Evan's face was stunning. Without hesitating he reached up and running the knuckle of his finger along John's jawline he let out a soft content sigh. John stood statue still coiled as if ready to run the moment his mind took back control of his body. Tilting his head slightly Evan 's smile became a slightly teasing grin as he chuckled, "You're looking at me like I'm going to eat you or something."
"I don't know what to do," breathed John embarrassment flooding his face at the whispered confession. He hated being out of control but he really didn't know what to do. His body want to obey every single one of Evan's unspoken orders but his mind his mind was screaming at him, telling him that he should be the dominant one, that he should be the one calling the shots. He was the bigger man, he was the…
"Stop thinking."
John's eyes snapped open and he stared down into Evan's grinning face.
"I can hear the wheels going round," teased Evan. He gave a little chuckle and running his hand down the centre of John's chest he ordered softly, "Just stop thinking and let me take care of you. For once let someone else worry about what is going to happen."
He held John's gaze, the brown eyes never wavering even as John's own eyes darted around and about the room unable to settle on anyone thing for too long. John felt a wave of panic rising in his chest. He had never given over control before, never really given in to anyone before. And yet at the very back of his mind, in the darkest recesses that he never looked in there a tiny little voice was screaming at him to take the offer. To accept Evan's offer to make everything simple.
"What if I can't do it?" stammered John, his voice barely a whisper.
"Then we stop and we forget we ever tried," replied Evan honestly. He ran his hand down John's chest letting his fingers catch on the ridges of John's muscles. With a playful smile he looked up adding teasingly, "I can feel you shaking."
"That because you're making me nervous!" snapped John wincing at how petulant he sounded.
"We can't have that," soothed Evan. He stepped closer crowding John intently the compact body pressing against John's more substantial bulk. Leaning up Evan pressed a kiss to John's lips and ordered gently, "Trust me."
John stared down at him. He wanted to. He wanted to trust the powerful high flyer staring back at him but he was scared. Scared that if he gave in once he'd never be able to pull back, he'd never be able to look at himself again. Scared that people would know he had given in, that he had been something less than a man that...
"No-one is going to know," soothed Evan gently as if reading John's thoughts. "Everything that happens between us is just that. It's between us, John, no one else. Out there, as far as the rest of the rosters are concerned you'll still be the man, the conquering hero, and I'll be the smiling, cute, non-threatening underdog. No one will know what happens between us because I will never tell." He paused and pressing his lips against Johns he breathed, "I'll never betray you, darling, never."
The room was silent for a moment neither man moving both seemingly content to stand pressed together the only movement caused by Evan's fingers gently teasing the edge of John's hair line. Licking his lips John took a deep breath then breathed, "What do you want me to do?"
"Just trust me," replied Evan, "That's all. Just let go and let me take care of you."
John nodded not trusting his voice. He gave a pained whimper when Evan pulled back breaking the surprisingly comforting contact. With a slightly vampish grin Evan rested his hands on his hips and gazed at John, regarding him as if he was a complex puzzle that needed solving. Blushing slightly at the intense observation John looked away, the normally confident man feeling more nervous than he had for years in the bedroom.
"Do you remember your safe word?" asked Evan softly.
John nodded. How could he forget it. He'd been shocked when Evan had whispered it in his ear. Orton. His best friend's name. The only man other than himself that John really did trust. The fact Evan had chosen that word meant more to him than words could say. It was one of the reasons he hadn't run away screaming from Evan's initial offer to play around, to explore a side of sex John had never contemplated before. The fact Evan seemed to know him so well and understand him so completely spoke to something deep within John's soul. He stared down at Evan and nodded again before whispering confidently, "I won't need it. I trust you."
Evan favoured him with a soul melting smile but reaching up the smaller man soothed, "I know but you can also say the word any time you want me to stop. Anytime this gets too much for you, you can say that word and I'll stop," he paused then leaning in pressed another soft, almost teasing kiss to John's lips before ordering gently, "Kneel for me. Show me you can obey."
John hesitated, then for the first time in his life he willingly obeyed such a powerful order. He slowly bent his knees and found himself kneeling in front of the compact figure, his eyes fixed firmly on Evan's hip. For a moment there was silence then he felt a hand stroking his head and as Evan praised, "Good boy," John couldn't help the satisfied grin curing his lip or ignore the wave of joy that spread through him at the simple but powerful words.
He closed his eyes relishing the soft touches Evan was treating him to. Clever fingers stroked his shorn hair soothing and exciting him at the same time. He heard a little chuckle then Evan murmured, "If you were a cat I think you'd be purring right now."
John flashed him a wide grin then blushed as he realised Evan had just compared him to a pet. For a moment the panic started to rise in him again. Was that what he was - a pet? Was he really nothing more than a plaything? Was this just a game, a joke, something to be mocked? As he breathing started to increase again he shifted uncomfortably the former enjoyment melting away leaving him anxious and tense.
"Shhh," soothed Evan obviously sensing the change in him, "Breathe, John just breathe."
He continued stroking John's hair, his fingers teasing the base of his hair line, pausing every now and then to curl around the thick neck. Stepping closer Evan eased John's head towards his body. For a moment John resisted, his former panic and uncertainty winning the battle for control of muscles but then as his cheek brushed Evan's stomach something changed inside him and suddenly he was resting his face against the warm skin as if it was the most normal thing to do. He heard a soft contented sigh escape above him and closing his eyes he leant against Evan taking comfort from the silent contact.
For several minutes Evan let him lean against him and John couldn't remember a time when he had felt more relaxed. The simple stroking motion of Evan's hand on his shorn hair and the warmth of Evan's skin against his face combined with the soft soothing noises that his master was making seemed to soothe John's very soul. He suddenly tensed as he realised the word he had just used to describe Evan. Master. He pulled back the fear surfacing again. But this time Evan didn't pull him back. This time there was no comforting "shh", Evan simply looked down at him and cocked his head questioningly.
Swallowed his fear and most of his pride John murmured hesitantly, "M...master?"
Evan held his gaze the brown eyes narrowing slightly before flooding with understanding. With a sweet smile Evan bent down and brushing his lips over John's mouth he breathed, "That's right Darling. I can be your master and you know what that means?"
John shook his head and nodded all in one go.
Evan chuckled and running his thumb over John's lower lip he explained, "It means I take care of you. It means you don't have to worry about anything when we're together. Your role is simply to be to obey, to let go and let me look after you." He paused and as if seeing the lingering fear and uncertainly in John's eyes he added meaningfully," It means you give me the greatest gift – your full and utter trust." He bent down and pressing another kiss to John's lips he asked softly, "Can you do that? Can you trust me to take care of you?
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John gave a loan guttural moan arching uncontrollably as Evan ran another long strip lick along his inner thigh the soft dark hair tickling his sac as his fingers teased John's prostate. Straining against the binding holding his wrists in place John tried to move tried to get more friction trying to get a little relief.
"Easy," soothed Evan lifting his mouth away from John's thigh. Running his free hand over John's hip he smiled and ordered, "No moving. You simply lie there, let me take care of everything"
John grunted, biting his lip, trying to obey the previous command to remain silent. He stared up at Evan, his blue eyes burning with need and desire and a surprising amount of pure and utter trust. Leaning up Evan nuzzled his face against John's whispered, "You look so amazing right now."
He stroked a hand over John's sweat slicked hair, smiling happily when John butted his head against his hand. Sighing happily Evan lowered his head licking a strip kiss along John's stomach teasing his belly button before moving lower. Circling a hand around John's staring shaft he sat back on his heels and started to stroke him. John closed his eyes relishing the feeling, wondering if finally after almost an hour Evan was actually going to let him come. Just as he was relaxing into the rhythm Evan pulled back, the smaller man chuckling as John bit back the various curses burning his throat, his hips bucking ineffectually against thin air.
"Shhh," soothed Evan sliding off the bed.
John gave a panicked whimper, the sudden lack of contact making his earlier fears rush back and without realising it he was fighting his binding. Instantly Evan was at his side a hand stroking John's chest the soft voice soothing, "Easy Darling easy I'm just getting some supplies." He bent down and pressed a kiss to Johns' forehead praising, "You are doing so well. I think its time you got a reward don't you?"
He held John's gaze staring into the bright blue depths until John felt as if the smaller man was staring straight into his soul. A low needy mew escaped his lips, the sound making Evan giggle. Pulling back he moved over to his suit case and rummaged around. Giving a little yap of delight he pulled out a small unused bottle of lube and turned back. Without speaking he squeezed a good amount of the new lube onto his own straining erection and smiled at John. Grabbing one of the discarded pillows he quickly realigned John's body then climbing back onto the bed he pushed John's large legs apart and smiled. Flexing his hips against John's he chuckled and ordered, "I want you to look at me. Keep your eyes on me nowhere else. Look away and I stop. Understand?"
John nodded franticly. He wanted this. He wanted to feel Evan in him, to feel the smaller man take him to own him. He wriggled against the restraints trying to get more contact. He failed all he managed to do was tighten the binding around his wrists but where an hour before that would have sacred him now it felt strangely comforting. He gave an almost pathetic mew as Evan's hands left his hips earning a teasing chuckle from his content master.
"You'll get all the contact you need in a moment," soothed Evan slicking himself up even more. He set the tube aside then looking John dead in the eye he murmured, "Don't hold back."
John tensed as he felt Evan's shaft nudging his hole. He was more prepared than he had ever been. Evan had spent much of the last hour licking, teasing and fingering him but even so the moment he felt the fleshy head touching him something deep inside John reared its head and he felt the former ease leaving him.
"Relax" soothed Evan the warm chocolate eyes never leaving John's, "John. Trust me – relax."
John stared into those brown depths and for a moment he felt the word forming in his throat he felt the first syllable of Randy's surname burning his throat but then suddenly everything exploded. As Evan pressed further and further into him, John simply arched up into the feeling, spreading his legs wider than before, offering himself up to his master and for the fist time in living memory he felt complete.
X x x x x x x x
John was certain that it should be the submissive who fussed and worried over the master not the other way around but he wasn't capable of moving let alone fetching a cloth to clean either of them up. Instead it was Evan who levered himself off the bed breaking the gorgeous embrace they had been sharing to fetch the much needed cloth.
As the smaller man cleaned away the sticky reminder of their session he looked up and flashed John a smile. It was a smile that did a thousand and one things to the big man but the main thing it did was make him feel valued. And that was a rare feeling for a man used to one night nameless hook-ups and backstage fumbles. To suddenly feel valued and wanted and loved was a very new experience for him. He froze as that word flashed across his mind but then Evan was climbing back into bed, the smaller man nudging him and shaping him until he was lying wrapped around the compact figure his head resting on what was quickly becoming his favourite pillow in the world. Nuzzling his face against Evan's stomach John gave a soft sigh then breathed, "Thank you."
Evan didn't reply, he simply used his flexibility to bend down and brushed a kiss over John's temple before stoking his hair again. For a few moments they sat in companionable silence, both still basing in the afterglow of their fist successful session. As he felt sleep start to claim him he heard Evan murmured, "Go to sleep, Darling, I've got you. You're safe"
And for the first time in years John actually fell asleep cradled in someone's arms and if he was honest if was the best feeling in the world.
FIN x