it is not logical.
and she loves the girl
with the too-bright eyes
and fakefakefake smile
but sometimes
she thinks she hates her too.
it's in the way
she makes her lose
control.
and in the way
she can't say no
but she has to because
otherwise
she won't say anything at all.
the girl is
c racked and bro ken
and so she has to
smile, sometimes, when all
she wants to do is
scream.
the girl suffocates her and
desecrates her
with so-so much
EMOTION
pounding in her head
illogical
illogical
make it stop
and when she has smiled
one too many
times and is about to run
the girl laughs
(whole and beautiful) and
maybe,
just maybe,
she is worth it.