Summary: My first ReTi fic. The tale of sorrow, from Tifa's betryal of Reno to his booze-induced suicide, and her guilt-ridden spiral into oblivion. Set to the tune and lyrics of Brad Paisley and Allison Kraus' "Whiskey Lullaby."

Disclaimer: I don't own FFVII, or this song. Just an idea that has been bugging me non-stop for about five days now. See? I can write without the usage of OCs! And yes, I know I've formatted the song weirdly. Didn't seem to fit if I kept the verses together. Song lyrics are in bold, and sorry if they look weird. is being a bitch for some reason.

Final Lullaby

"So, you're really going to ask her?"

His partner's rarely-heard baritone shocked Reno out of his nostalgic stupor, and he looked at his partner before flashing his customary cocky grin. "Of course I am, yo. She and I are meant to be, y'know. Anyway, she's been expecting it as long as I've been planning it. Just waiting for the right moment, that's all."

Rude smirked, the merest smile tugging at his lips. "And that moment has arrived?"

"Yeah, it has." Reno allowed his memories to sweep him away again, memories of Tifa giving him one more kiss before he left for that mission in Junon with Rude and Elena, her lips soft on his and her arms tightening possessively around his neck. He recalled how serious she had been when she had whispered into his ear Finish this mission, and keep yourself safe. Then we can start our family.

And surprisingly, the thought of being a daddy wasn't such a frightening one anymore. As long as Tifa was the mother of his brats. He brushed a stray lock of his crimson hair away from his nose and gazed out the window of the truck, wondering anew how the hell he had fallen for her. He, the one Turk unanimously agreed upon as the worst possibility for marriage, the one guaranteed as the last man you wanted to sire your kid. The one Turk who had sworn up and down, a hundred times over, that he would never, ever get married, not in a million years.

And here he was, planning on asking Tifa Lockheart, his girlfriend of two years, to marry him, the ring box a comforting weight in his pocket.

Furthermore, why had she turned down Cloud Strife, the man he could have sworn was going to steal her away before their big break-up a few years back, and chosen a goofball like him? Tifa deserves better than me, yo. Strife would be a better match for her then I could ever be, Reno mused moodily.

But she chose me instead.

How had he ever gotten so lucky?

"Reno? Reno!" Rude's voice snapped him out of his trance again, and he turned his head to look at the bald Turk again, his expression quizzical. "You're home."

The redhead looked at the entrance to his and Tifa's home, the apartment across the street from Seventh Heaven, and then back at his partner. "So I am. Thanks for the ride, partner."

"No problem. Just don't make her wait too long for that ring, Reno."

"Don't worry. I won't, yo." Reno slammed the door shut and watched Rude drive away. Then he grabbed his bag off the curb, dusted it off, and slung it back over his shoulder. Honey, I'm home!

The door was unlocked, which meant Tifa was home. The redhead started to kick the door shut behind him, but then stopped himself and shut it quietly. It was pretty early in the afternoon; Tifa was usually asleep at this time of day, catching a few hours of peaceful rest before the inevitable hectic night at her bar. Maybe he could surprise her in bed. After all, the mission hadn't taken as long as he had originally been told, two weeks as opposed to a month.

He crept up the stairs, careful to avoid the squeaky one. Won't she be surprised to see me...

The door to her room was slightly ajar, illuminated by the sunlight streaming through the window. Reno grinned and sneaked closer, his hand nearly touching the knob before he heard Tifa's moan.

What the...?

Suddenly afraid, and not sure why, the Turk gently pushed the door open.

Tifa was lying in bed, naked beneath the sheet. And she was not alone.

Cloud Strife was with her, likewise covered only by the sheet. It was obvious what they were doing, and had been for some time.

Reno shrank back from the door in horror, his boot hitting one of the squeaky boards. The couple in the bed turned towards the doorway, and Tifa paled ghost-white when she realized who was in the portal. Cloud smirked.

"Reno..." She grabbed for her clothes, trying to get into them. The Turk didn't want to hear her excuses. He pulled the ring box out of his pocket and flung it on the ground, then turned and bolted, down the stairs and out the door, as fast as he could. He had to get away from this nightmare, away from the woman he loved and the man who had stolen her from him. He'd die if he stayed to hear her excuses.

He couldn't stand it if she knew how badly his heart was breaking.

"Reno!" Tifa threw open the door to the street, half-dressed, only to see the redhead mounting Cloud's bike and driving away as fast as he could. She fell to her knees, tears streaming from her crimson eyes as she held the ring to her forehead. The ring on which he had pinned so much hope. "Reno... I'm sorry... So sorry..."

She put him out like the burnin' end of a midnight cigarette.
She broke his heart. He spent his whole life tryin' to forget.

Reno slammed the bottle back on the bar, enraged that it was empty again. "Hit me again!" he slurred at the bartender, not noticing his former partner creeping into the dark little tavern and sliding onto the stool next to him.

"Sir, I think you've had enough..." the bartender started to say, but stopped when the drunk redhead pounded his fist on the time-polished wood of the bar.

"I came 'ere to drink my friggin' brainsh out. You don' tell me when I can shtop!" Reno settled back on his stool, rubbing his head against his hand. "Now, hit me again, goddamit!"

The bartender threw Rude a despairing look, but got nothing from behind the dark sunglasses. With a deep sigh, he brought out another bottle of whiskey, and a second one just to placate the drunk ex-Turk. Reno grabbed the first one and raised it to his lips, taking a healthy swig of the amber-colored liquid.

Rude reached out and put a hand on the redhead's shoulder, a gesture calculated to be non-threatening. Reno may have been kicked out of the Turks, but he still possessed the instincts of a killer, and the combat-training to go with it. "Reno, you have to stop doing this to yourself. You're going to die if you don't stop."

Reno glared at him through one red-veined eye, the vivid green iris strangely beautiful in its unhealthy setting. "Maybe that'sh what I want, Rude."

The bald Turk felt pity course through him as he watched his former partner drain the bottle. He knew full well why Reno was killing himself slowly, drowning himself in self-pity and cheap booze. He knew why Reno hadn't put up a fight when Rufus and Tseng had fired him for his apathetic attitude and poor performance in a job he had once excelled at. He knew why his partner had gone from the best Turk there was to a pathetic has-been, squandering his precious income on whiskey every single night.

The memory of Tifa Lockheart still haunted him.

Despite her betrayal, Reno was still in love with her.

We watched him drink his pain away a little at a time.
But he never could get drunk enough to get her off his mind.

"STOP HAUNTING ME!!!" Reno screamed, head thrown back to the sky and hands fisted in his limp red hair. Rain splashed down on his upturned face, mingling with his tears and falling to soak his dirt-encrusted shirt. He curled on the asphalt, arms cradling his head while sobs wracked his lean body. "Just... Leave me alone... Let me forget you..."

The vision didn't go away. He could still see them together in that bed, her arms and legs twining around his body, the voice he missed so much breathlessly begging him to go faster. He hadn't seen it exactly like that, but he could still imagine it. Cloud Strife in bed with her. Reno's woman.

"Leave me alone..." He crawled over to the wall and hitched himself up against it, leaning his back against the rain-washed brick and curling his arms around his legs, resting his head on his knees. This was why he spent so much time drinking. When he was sober, he just couldn't stop crying. Couldn't stop remembering, unless he was shit-faced. He couldn't find peace unless he was unconscious, incapable of remembering. "I don't want to remember you, Tifa. I don't..."

At the mouth of the alley, a silhouette watched the drama, the lightening flashing off a pair of expensive black sunglasses. Behind the glasses, eyes the color of warm honey were brimming with tears.

Until the night...

Reno sat on his filthy mattress with just the stub of a candle to light the room. In his hands was a picture of the woman he had loved, the woman he still loved. She was still as beautiful, as perfect as always, smiling up at him from the simple wooden frame.

The same could not be said of the ex-Turk. Reno had once been a head-turner, a really handsome guy with ripped muscles that girls would beg to get with (and had, on many occasions). But now... His muscles were long gone; he was practically a walking skeleton now. His crimson hair, long admired by smitten women and jealous men alike, was now limp and lifeless, more a sickly orange than the once-vibrant red. He was so pale now that his scars looked as fresh and new as the day he had recieved them, almost like some kid had drawn them on his face with a red magic marker. He looked, and felt, like shit.

I can't do this anymore...

One thing he had been certain to do before leaving the Turks was to sneak a weapon out. He had been forced to turn his electro-mag rod in, but he had managed to get his hands on a small pistol and slip it into his jacket. That gun lay on his mattress beside him, a single bullet in the cylinder.

One bullet was all that he would need.

He looked at the picture one more time, then set it gently on the floor where he could see it from the pillow. With a scrap of paper he had fished out of somebody's garbage and a broken pencil, he wrote one final note.

Sorry Rude, but I just can't go on anymore. I know you'll be the one to find me. Forgive me, but... I love her, man. And I just can't forget her. Good-bye, partner, -Reno

That done, he threw the pencil across the room, the filthy little hovel he rented at a dirt-cheap price because the landlady was an old friend of his mother. He had made sure to give her the month's rent the day before. He didn't want to cause her too much anxiety. It would be bad enough that his dead ass would be found in her house, after all.

One last swig of whiskey, and the bottle was tossed to the floor. Reno picked up the pistol, and clicked the cylinder until the bullet was in the firing chamber. The note was tucked beneath her picture with utmost care, the backs of his fingers brushing over the cool glass one final time. Lying on his stomach, the redhead put the gun's muzzle against his forehead, dead center.

His bloodshot eyes turned to the picture one more time as his finger began to tighten on the trigger.

Good-bye... Tifa.

Downstairs, Rude flinched as a single shot exploded into the air.

He put that bottle to his head and pulled the trigger,
And finally drank away her memory.
Life is short but this time it was bigger
Than the strength he had to get up off his knees.
We found him with his face down in the pillow,
With a note that said 'I'll love her till I die.'

Rude looked over the people standing around the lonely grave beneath the tree, and felt unfathomably sad. Reno had always loved this spot, this small park Rufus' money had paid for in Edge. A willow tree overlooking a lake, surrounded by cool green grass. If he had had a hard day at work, he would invariably be sitting beneath this tree, just watching the moon sparkling across the water. This was Reno's thinking spot, his sanctuary of peace.

And now it was his grave.

Everyone had come to pay their final respects. Rufus, the Turks, the members of AVALANCHE (except Cloud; he was not welcome here at the funeral), and Reeve had all shown up. Reno may not have ever believed it, but there were people who cared about him aside from Rude, people who had worried about him after Tifa cheated on him, and would miss him now that he was gone.

But the one person who would miss him the most was conspicuously missing from the funeral. Rude thought he understood. She was the sole reason Reno had gone down so hard, so badly.

And she knew it.

So Rude waited until sundown before he visited the grave again, alone. And as he suspected, she was there, kneeling before the marker with a rose in her hand. He ducked behind one of the neighboring trees, hoping that she hadn't seen him.

It seemed that she hadn't. Tifa brushed her fingers across the gravestone, and set the blood-red rose carefully across the top. Even at this distance, Rude could tell that she was crying. "I'm so sorry, Reno... I never should have let Cloud in the house... I knew you were coming back, I shouldn't have given in... I never loved him, Reno. It was you, all along. I loved you." She collapsed against the marker, wrapping her arms around the cold gray stone and crying with all the pain of her broken heart. "I always loved you... And now I've lost you...

"I'm so sorry... Please... Forgive me!"

And when we buried him beneath the willow,
The angels sang a whiskey lullaby.

The months passed slowly for Tifa. She had at least been able to hold it together while he was alive, but now that he was gone, she gradually broke down. At first, it was just a few sips sneaked from the whiskey bottles in the back of the bar, just to 'keep her strength up.' But then she started swiping entire bottles, then entire cases. She stopped showing up for work, preferring to stay in her room in the apartment with only the whiskey for company. She tried to go about her daily life, hiding her pain beneath her usual cheerful smile, the dark circles under her eyes concealed by makeup. She stopped eating, she stopped going to work.

She stopped caring.

Barret, Yuffie, and all the other members of AVALANCHE tried to talk her out of her obsession with the bottle, all in their own various fashions, but at long last they just stopped coming around. Cloud tried to bring her back from the brink, talking to her as though they were friends again, but she threw him bodily out onto the street and screamed that he had ruined her life, that she never wanted to see his face again.

One by one, all of her friends just gave up on her.

They stopped trying to help her, because she stopped caring about herself.

The rumors flew but nobody know how much she blamed herself.
For years and years, she tried to hide the whiskey on her breath.

Rude tried to keep tabs on Tifa over the years, out of loyalty to Reno. He watched Seventh Heaven gradually fall to ruin, saw the stream of people going to visit the martial artist trickle to a halt. Eventually, even Vincent stopped checking up on her. He stood helplessly by while she sank deeper and deeper into depression, the bottles of amber fluid her constant companions and only comfort.

He was watching outside her window one night, observing her through a pair of binoculars, when he witnessed one of her depressive crying-fits. She was lying on the sofa with her feet propped up on the coffee table, drinking sporadically from some of the bottles scattered across the cushions around her, watching an action flick. When the heroine and her partner realized that they were in love and possibly going to die during their next battle, Tifa threw one of the bottles at the screen. Predictably, the bottle impaled the television and the set exploded.

But Tifa didn't seem to care. She instead curled up on the couch with her head in her hands, shoulders shaking so hard that Rude knew she was crying again. Carefully, he adjusted the microphone in his ear so the bug he had planted in her apartment would transmit whatever she might be muttering.

"Why can't I forget you, Reno? I've tried. Holy knows, I've tried! But I can't! I just can't!" He heard her crying even more, the sound muffled due to her hands over her face. And then...

"I swear, if I could take back one thing, it would be that day. I don't care how long it was, I should never have allowed Cloud to seduce me. What he and I had was good, it was hot, but what you and I had was hotter, better! I don't know what came over me, but if there was anything I could do to bring you back, to take back that day, I would do it! No matter what the price; I don't care what the price is!

"I just want you back..."

Then Rude saw her grab some of the bottles, and knew that she was going to drink herself into unconsciousness again, a desperate bid to forget the memories of her time with his ex-partner, a gamble to erase her memory of that ill-fated encounter with her former friend and leader.

He lowered the binoculars and clicked off the microphone. He had witnessed that scene far more times than he ever cared to admit.

She finally drank her pain away a little at a time.
But she never could get drunk enough to get him off her mind.

"I'm SORRY!" Tifa pounded the pillow with her fist, unable to get some sleep because every time she closed her eyes memories of Reno came to the forefront of her subconscious. Memories of the sweet things he had done for her, his annoying idiosyncracies that drove her absolutely insane. Recollections of long nights in his arms, rolling around on the sheets and sharing the shower with him. All those times he had come up behind her while she was cooking or working at the bar, wrapping his arms around her waist and nuzzling her hair, kissing her neck or temple while she relaxed against the lean, solid heat of his body.

The hated memory of his face, a picture of horror and dismay, watching her and Cloud having sex on their bed. The memory of his jacket flapping behind him while he fled down the stairs and stole Fenrir, riding away from her as fast as the bike could go.

"I burned that bed! I threw Cloud out of my life! What more do you want from me? What do I have to do to sleep in peace?" She fell back against the pillow, crying from frustration and constant heart-break. "Reno... I'd take it back if I could!"

Her hand reached up to her neckline, dug into her leather vest until she located the object of her torment, the reminder of all that she could have had, and brought it out so the starlight shone full upon it.

A silver ring, set with a perfect pearl.

The same ring Reno had thrown at her when he had discovered her and Cloud all those years ago. She had kept it ever since, and thought of it as her penance. She had the ring, but not what could have come with it.

The ring, but not the man.

"Reno... I miss you..." Tears slipped silently down her cheeks as she stared at the ring, turning it slowly around its chain. "Forgive me... Please forgive me..."

Until the night...

Tifa watched her reflection in the mirror over the sink as the tub filled with water, noticing how dull her once-glossy hair was, how thin her skin seemed. She was only skin and bones now, her once-ogled breasts far too large on her skeletal frame. Her eyes were now a general red; she could hardly tell where the irises ended and the 'whites' began. She would die if she didn't start consuming something other than whiskey soon.

That mattered not to her.

She was planning on speeding up the process in a few minutes.

The bath was done. Tifa dropped her towel and slid into the tub, reaching for the tools of her demise. His razor, sharpened until she could split hairs with it, and a framed picture of the redhead she loved and lost. A suicide note was unnecessary, as far as she was concerned. There would be nobody coming to check up on her. She had driven them all away months ago.

"Reno... I'll see you soon."

She set the picture on the edge of the tub and flipped open the razor, baring her right wrist to its gleaming edge. It hurt, to slice so deeply into her wrist, but compared to the pain in her heart it was but a pittance. The blood flowed thick and fast, fueled by the fast beating of her heart, turning the water the same deep ruby as her eyes.

The process only quickened when she cut into her other wrist, wanting to end it as fast as possible.

Feeling her lifeblood leaving her, Tifa grabbed his picture and hugged it to her chest.

"I love you..."

Opening her mouth, the broken woman slipped beneath the surface of her bloody bath and accepted the water into her lungs without a fight.

She put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger,
And finally drank away his memory.
Life is short but this time it was bigger
Than the strength she had to get up off her knees.

We found her with her face down in the pillow,
Clinging to his picture for dear life.

Rude found her, when his bug failed to confirm that she was in the apartment. The scent of rancid blood alerted him to the disaster awaiting him, and he followed it to the bathroom.

It was there that he found her, laying in a tubful of bloody water, a picture of Reno clutched tightly in her arms. The ring his ex-partner had shown him, the ring he had purchased as an engagement ring, was lying between her breasts on a silver chain, the once-pristine pearl stained the color of her blood.

As though the ring had bled along with both of its owners.

We laid her next to him

Beneath the willow

While the angels sang a whiskey lullaby.

Marlene looked at the grave of her friend Tifa Lockheart with sorrow in her heart, holding tightly to the bouquet of lilies she had gathered for this exact purpose. Tifa had been buried next to that redhaired guy she liked, Reno, and everyone had come to her funeral, as expected. Even Cloud had come to pay his final respects, although his farewell consisted of standing over her grave and staring at the marker. Marlene knew that he felt guilty about her death, as he did over that one woman, Aerith.

She turned away from the graves and walked to the lake, knowing that her father was too busy trying to act tough and not cry to pay much attention to her at the moment. She just wanted a few moments alone with her thoughts.

But to her astonishment, she realized that she was not alone.

In the shade of the willow, where none of the others would see them, were Reno and Tifa. They looked as healthy as they had before Reno had gone off on that last mission to Junon, and they were smiling.

"I don't care about what happened anymore, Tifa. I missed you, and I love you. That's all that matters."

"I know. We suffered too much when we were apart. It doesn't matter what I did, or how you reacted." She moved into his open arms, wrapping her own around his waist and burying her face in his chest. "I was stupid to give in to him."

"And I was stupid to let you go like that." His arms closed around her, tangled in her hair while he nuzzled the top of her head. "I couldn't live without you."

"Neither could I." She pressed closer to him, a smile on her face. "Don't leave me again."

"I won't, Tifa. I promise. But you have to stay with me too."

"I will." She raised her head and kissed him, a gentle caressing of their lips. "I love you too, Reno."

Marlene watched as they faded away into white light, then felt Denzel's hand on her shoulder. "What happened, Marlene? Where did they go?"

She smiled, then turned away to return to her father. He was probably worried about her now. "They've returned to the Lifestream, Denzel. They've forgiven each other, and they love each other.

"And they are together."