Welcome to Parallel Kingdom Hearts... Were everyday is tuseday, Demyx sniffs Pixie Sticks, and spellin' dosen't matter! D
Chapter 1- I Need a Bathroom!
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Kingdom Hearts characters.
Christmas time. That meant Demyx would go around asking everyone what he or she wanted. And Christmas movies. And elf can up on the screen. He looked like he was a human.
"I guess the must of switched Saix with him at birth," Yuxki laughed, not noticing that Saix was passing by. He heard the elf comment.
"WHO'S AN ELF!?"
Not good.
Saix went berserk just as Demyx came up to him.
"Saix what do you-" Demyx stared for a second before he yelled "Run, run away!" and ran down the hall.
"I know how much you use don't use your toilet, so I'll take it off your hands!" he said sarcastically. Saix went into Yuxki's room and came out with the toilet, which he threw at the T.V.
"Damn it, Saix! We were watching that!" Axel whined. The red head seemed to be the only one who wasn't fazed by Saix, or his berserk mode.
"Let's see you hold it for 18 hours now!" Saix said, with an evil smirk.
"I was going to use that!" Yuxki yelled in despair. She hadn't gone to the bathroom in 14 hours. "I HAVE TO PEE!" she screamed. She flew past Demyx, who was hiding behind Xenmas. Xenmas just raised an eyebrow. Then he noticed the toilet though the T.V. Saix must have gone berserk.
"Luxord! Bathroom!" Yuxki said, franticly.
"Where's your bathroom?" He was teasing her.
"Do you want me to piss my pants!?"
"Sure. I need a good picture of you for my Myspace."
"Diz is on there."
"I can stop time."
"…That would come in handy before I pee my pants."
"Or while you're pissin' yourself."
"Just let me use your bathroom!"
"Hm… I dunno…"
"LUXORD!"
"Alright."
Yuxki couldn't get to the bathroom fast enough. Xenmas walked down the hall.
"Is Yuxki in there?" he asked Luxord.
"Try some where else."
"I saw her run in here."
"Well I'm her boyfriend."
"That's why I'm worried."
"See needs a bathroom, and I was kidding."
"Members are suppose to use their own bathrooms"
"She doesn't have one."
Xenmas just walked away. He gave up. It was so hard dealing with all the members.
"I hope you understand." Xenmas scolded. Yuxki nodded.
"But I at least need a toilet," Yuxki said.
"I'll see if maybe you can use Demyx's," Xenmas said as he walked out of Yuxki's room.
Luxord slowly climbed out of darkness portal. "Let's hope he won't be back."
"I guess I'm gonna be usin' Demyx's bathroom," Yuxki sighed. "You're my boyfriend; he's Mansex. He would never allow me to use your bathroom."
"I still need a picture of you for my Myspace," he said, kissing Yuxki.
It was the worse possible time for Xigbar to walk in. Luxord imminently pulled away. Busted.
"What were you doods doing?" he asked. Yuxki was bright red by now.
"Nothing." Luxord said innocently.
"Demyx! I hafta peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Yuxki cried as she pounded away at the door. Four straight weeks. After Saix had broken her toilet Xenmas told Yuxki that she could use Demyx's until it was fixed. The problem was they were Nobodies in The World That Never Was. People didn't come around, it was hard to get anyone to find the place, without a gummi ship and not everyone was willing to step into a blackish-purplish to do so. So it remained unfixed.
"DEMYX! Stop doing your drugs and let me use the bathroom!" Demyx opened the door. "Thanks."
"Demyx."
"Yes."
"I'm bored."
"Sniff this."
"What is it?"
"Pixie Stick."
Sniff "…"
"So…"
"Ow! It burns!"
"It's great, isn't it?"
"Gimmie another one."
Where were they? Yuxki had gone to the bathroom and it had been a half hour and she still wasn't out. Xenmas knocked on Demyx's door. "Demyx?" Xenmas opened the door.
"M-A-N-S-E-X. Got it memorized?" Giggling.
"B-I-G-R-A-X. Have you memorized it?" More giggling.
"Axel?" Xenmas asked. Where was it coming from?
"Gimmie another pixie sticks."
Demyx and Yuxki had an annoying habit of hiding under the bed. "Demyx? Yuxki?"
"Yesssssss?" Yuxki sang.
They were high.
"Hiya, Mansex!" Demyx smiled.
"Come out from under there right now!" Xenmas yelled.
"Mansex sounds pissed…" Yuxki said. It was quite for a moment. Then an immense storm of giggling came.
"NOW!" Xenmas was getting mad. The two Nobodies came out from under the bed. "Where are the drugs?"
"We don't have any-" Yuxki started innocently.
"You look like you've been sniffing something," Xenmas scolded. Both members laughed out loud.
"Fine, fine! We give!" Demyx said in between laughs. Yuxki reached underneath the bed and pulled out a bag of Pixie Sticks. Half of them were gone.
"Pixie Sticks?"
"Yep."
"Did you eat these?"
"No."
"Sniff them?"
"You bettcha!" The two Nobodies burst out laughing again.
You can get high off Pixie Sticks?
Xenmas had given them a long lecture and then sent Yuxki out of Demyx's room.
"You okay?" Luxord asked.
"Cheese!" Yuxki said, happily.
"What are you on?"
"Ritalin!" Axel suggested.
"Nope, Pixie Sticks."
"Are you kidding?"
"Nope, Demyx got high off them, too." A stupid grin spread across Yuxki's face.
"We are the most dysfunctional family ever. Heck we're not even blood or marriage related. We're just Nobodies," Axel said.
"Mansex is an emo zebra, Xig is trigger happy, Xaldin has evil sideburns, Vexen is someone's grandpa, No one cares about Lexaeus, Zexi is short, Saix is an elf who goes berserk, Axel is a Pyro, Demyx has low self-esteem and he sniffs Pixie Sticks, Luxord like to gamble, Marxi is gay, Larxene has angry problems and Roxas still has his person –Sora- running around, and me.. What's my problem?" Yuxki asked.
"You sniff Pixie Sticks," Axel smiled.
"Yes and I sniff Pixie Sticks!" Yuxki agreed.
"I need to use the bathroom," Yuxki announced.
"Didn't you just go?" Luxord asked.
"No I was busy sniffing Pixie Sticks," Yuxki smiled. "Demyx are you still in there?"
"Yes!" Demyx replied.
"Can I use the bathroom?"
"I can't get the door open!"
"Are you high!?"
"Yes…"
"Oh… That explains a lot…" Yuxki ran off looking for a place to pee.
Mansex's Room
"Mansex!"
Who had interrupted his dairy writing? "I'm busy!" Xenmas yelled back.
"I have to use the bathroom!"
"Use Demyx's."
"He's too high to open the door!"
"I don't have time to deal with this." No answer. Xenmas sighed. He got up and opened his door. There was a yellow puddle right outside his door.
Luxord and Axel were down the hall, in Yuxki's room.
"That was great!" Axel laughed.
"I couldn't hold it anymore." Yuxki said, blushing a little.
A/N: Mansex is what some of the members call Xenmas, Xig Xigbar, Zexi Zexi, Marxi Marluxia