This is an idea for what could've happened in Chechnya. It'll probably be disproved over the next few episodes, but hey- they haven't said anything yet.

Warnings: minor character death (offscreen), violence.

Jack watched as Mac swung the door shut, a solemn expression on the younger man's face. Once the door was shut, Jack took a minute to compose himself. Then he looked up at Matty, who was staring the man down.

The woman put her hands on her hip. "What's this about, Jack?"

Jack sighed. "I wanted to say I'm sorry."

Matty raised an eyebrow. "For what?"

Jack shook his head. "For Chechnya. You put yourself on the line. You stuck your neck out for me, and you took a huge personal blow. You shouldn't have had to do that, and I really wish I hadn't had to have put you in that position"

Matty stared at the man. "You think a little 'I'm sorry' can fix all of that?"

The brunet stared at his hands as he spoke. "No. The apology was just to start the conversation. I wanted to tell you that I appreciate what you did."

Matty sighed, walking to the couch and taking a seat. "It's not that I had to bail you out from the CIA top dogs. It's that you didn't seem to think you'd done anything wrong."

Jack shook his head, glancing up at the woman opposite him. "It was hard for me to admit that I should've made a better call. I was too prideful to tell you that I didn't see any better options."

Matty shrugged expressively as she said, "I shouldn't have been as hard on you either. Yes, there were better decisions you could've made, but you were under a lot of pressure, and a lot of my anger at you came from me being frustrated that the higher-ups didn't realize that."

The two agents sat in silence for a moment, and then Jack broke it. "So. We good?"

Matty looked at Jack and smiled at him, a real smile, for the first time since Chechnya. "Yeah. We're good."

Jack huffed as he stood. "Well, in that case, do you want to come over and eat buttermilk pie? It's the best thing I've ever had, and I've eaten a lot in my day."

Matty's smile grew wider as she recognized the gesture for what it was: a gesture of goodwill and a further step in healing the rift that had grown between the two of them. "I'd like that."

Jack said, as the two of them began to walk out, "Fair warning, though, you'll have to put up with a bunch of kids."

Matty lifted an eyebrow. "Oh?"

Jack let out a chuckle. "Yeah, they all think they're very mature, and then they do or say something dumb enough that you remember that they're all still pretty young. I mean, they were all pretty excited to play truth or dare the other day."

"Uh-huh. And did you join in?"

"Of course. I couldn't let them think I was afraid."

The two shared a grin as they reached their cars, feeling a familiar warmth of camaraderie begin to grow in their chests, a feeling that had been missing for far too long.

After everyone but Jack had left- Bozer was driving Riley home since her car was in the shop- Mac geared himself up for the conversation that he knew was going to happen tonight, one way or another.

The blond was lying on the living room couch his sock-clad feet poking out from underneath a blanket. Jack was puttering around in the kitchen, cleaning up after the sandwich he had just eaten.

Mac cleared his throat. "Jack?"

Jack said, absently, "Yeah?"

"Can you come here for a second?"

Jack stopped poking around the kitchen, quickly crossing the room and coming to a stop behind the couch, resting his arms on the back of the furniture as he looked down at his friend. "What's up, man?"

Mac sat up, crossing his legs and letting the blanket pool in his lap as he got straight to the point. "What happened in Chechnya, Jack?"

Jack frowned, standing up straight. "I thought you'd've realized that I don't really want to talk about it."

Mac said, softly, "Why not?"

"Why are you so curious?"

Mac said, "Because just like you always say it's your job to be there for me, it's my job to be there for you! You're obviously torn up over this thing; I can't just watch you drown in your own misery!"

"Too bad, Mac, I'm not telling you!"

The blond threw out his arms. "Why? Cause you don't trust me? I'd've thought that I'd gained that by now."

Jack deflated suddenly, all of the fight going out of him. "You're right. I do trust you, and I should've told you this earlier. I guess I just- didn't want you to think less of me."

Mac watched as Jack walked around the couch and took a seat across from the younger man, putting his back to the armrest and turning so that he and the blond were face to face. The brunet cleared his throat as he began.

"It was supposed to be a milk run- just pick up a package from a drop point and bring it back to headquarters. Only problem was, when we got the package, we found a note inside.

"The man who dropped the package had been killed by the people who intercepted him. The note said that they'd taken thirty-two people hostage- all civilians between the ages of thirty and thirty-five. Unless their demands were met, they'd both set off a bomb and kill all of their hostages.

"They wanted the nuclear launch codes for Russia, China, and the US. I couldn't give those to them, even if there was a way for me to get the other countries' launch codes.

"I tried to negotiate with them, but they wouldn't have it. They started the timer on the bomb- we knew where it was, because, for a greater intimidation factor, I guess, it was this huge metal thing that was highly visible and everyone thought was a new statue by a nearby building. Then they said that unless their demands were met, they were gonna kill all the hostages.

"I was in charge. Our communication to headquarters was cut off. I had fifteen people under my command, and I decided to send seven of them to disarm the bomb, because there was no way that the terrorists hadn't left the thing unguarded.

"Then me and the other eight guys had to try and get the hostages out. When I told the terrorists that they might have to wait a few extra hours- trying to buy time, you know- they killed someone. Laura Denner, thirty-three, with a boyfriend of a year that was going to propose to her the next week.

"I knew that my best choice- or what I thought was my best choice- was to take the house by storm.

"Three other people died. John Launter, thirty-one, James Seman, thirty-five, and Samantha Toderlon, thirty-two.

"Matty told the higher-ups that it was her call. That she was the one telling me what to do- that she had found a way to contact me. She saved me from getting kicked out of the CIA and possibly a trial looking into my connections with the terrorists, and took a huge hit to her reputation.

"I quit after that mission, and it took me a long time to realize that I did the best I could in the situation I was in."

Jack fell silent, and Mac stared at his knee, picking at the blanket that rested on it. The older man shrugged. "Now you know."

Mac scrubbed a hand through his hair. "Jack, I'd never think less if you for that. It was a lose-lose situation. You did the best you could."

Jack let out a shaky laugh, bringing a hand up to dash away the suspicious drops of moisture that had gathered there. "Yeah?"

Mac swallowed against the lump that had formed in his throat. "Yeah."

Suddenly, impulsively, Jack turned to the blond and pulled him into his arms, hugging him tightly. Mac wrapped his arms just as tightly around the brunet. Jack had made his peace with the mission years ago, that was true, but there would always be some grief in him, some part of him that whispered maybe you could've done better, saved more people, something, anything-

For now, though, the older man took comfort in his friend's unwavering support of him.

They stayed like that for a long time.

i've looked at this so much i can't even tell if it's good sorry guys