Albus Severus Potter had been lying to himself for an entire year. He had finally come to terms with this new found truth this past summer, when he was visiting his grandparents at The Burrow with his cousin Rose Granger-Weasley. She had also invited Albus' best friend—who was also her boyfriend—Scorpius Malfoy. The four of them, including Albus' sister Lily, were all sitting around in the living room. Scorpius had just finished a game of exploding snap with Lily when Rose threw her head back onto the couch.
"I'm bored," she groaned in exasperation, "and hot."
"We could go swimming!" Lily piped up. Outside, the sun was shining brightly, its rays coming through the window and illuminating the dust that danced through the air. "I bet the pool will be really refreshing today."
"That sounds good to me." Scorpius added, sitting up abruptly and causing a bit of his hair to fall in front of his face. It angled around his cheekbones, making them appear more profound, if such a thing was even possible.
You're staring. Albus reminded himself. Enough with the staring thing!
Rose stood up quickly, pursing her lips. "I'm sure I've left a swimsuit somewhere in Grandma's spare rooms. Let's go look Lil!"
The two girls ran upstairs, leaving the boys alone. Albus listened as the weight of their feet made the old staircase groan. He sighed. "I suppose I should look too, but this sofa is way too comfy..."
"Oh, c'mon, Albus! Quit being so lazy and get up and have some fun," Scorpius said as he stood up, extending his hand down to Albus. Albus took the offered hand reluctantly, the feeling of their connected hands sending a jolt up Albus' spine. Albus chose to ignore it, it was typical for his body to have that sort of reaction every time he and Scorpius touched.
Albus had undergone a small growth spurt this summer—seeing as he now was about an inch and a half taller than Scorpius and slightly more built physically. He had been practicing Quidditch more and more ever since he decided to join the team last year, to get his mind off things. So he could distract himself from his own developing feelings. As it turned out, he wasn't such a bad Chaser, and, like his mom, he was actually pretty decent. It had finally given him something to bond over with his brother James, who was still a bossy, sometimes intolerable, git but Albus knew that he meant well.
Albus begrudgingly went upstairs to his Uncle's old room where he remembered he left his swim trunks the last time they had been here. He located another pair that looked to be the right size and grabbed them for Scorpius.
"Here," Albus said as he tossed the pair of swim trunks to his friend. "These should do."
Despite the short distance between them, Scorpius barely caught the trunks in his fumbling hands. Scorpius, on the other hand, had never gotten the hang of Quidditch, he would much rather just watch the others play or, even better, have his nose stuck in a book somewhere.
"Thanks, Albus," Scorpius replied, begging to unbuckle his belt. It took every bit of Albus' self discipline to turn his head, and despite not looking, he could still feel the heat rising up his face.
"It's great we get to spend some time together this summer isn't it?" Scorpius said from behind Albus, "And it's great how we all get along now! You, me and Rose, I mean."
"Yeah," Albus answered quietly, trying to hide the melancholy in his voice.
To tell the truth, he missed the days when it had just been him and Scorpius—the two of them against the world. The dynamic duo of unpopularity, they only had each other, and for awhile that was all they needed.
It wasn't until Scorpius had finally gotten the guts to ask Rose out at the end of their fourth year that things had started changing drastically. When Albus heard that his best friend had asked out his cousin, and she had, unexpectedly, said yes, his heart sank. Not because he felt abandoned, well, at first, that's what he thought it was, but there was more to it than the feeling of abandonment. He started to become irritated whenever he saw the two of them holding hands in the corridors, or when he saw Scorpius whisper something into Rose's ear and she would giggle.
He began to try and find ways to distract himself; so initially, he had started becoming better friends with his Slytherin classmates especially Danni Higgs and Marcus Davis. The two of whom had convinced him to join the Quidditch team at the start of the year because Slytherin was down a Chaser. Albus had surprised himself with how good he actually was, and it seemed that all those years watching his family had really affected him.
Not only did it finally give him something to bond over with James, who was still too competitive for Albus' taste but it was nice to have an actual relationship with his brother, even if it was a friendly rivalry type relationship. He remembered when his parents had attended his first game. Usually, they were always adorned in red and gold but when he finally spotted them in the crowd they both had on green and silver attire and were cheering obnoxiously. On the day of the Gryffindor and Slytherin match they both wore all four colors, undeniably making them the tackiest individuals in the whole arena, but Albus still appreciated the effort.
As much as he tried to ignore the blossoming relationship between his cousin and Scorpius, he could not escape the inevitable truth that with every passing second he was becoming even more irritated with the fact that he was not the one holding hands with Scorpius or that he wasn't the one Scorpius was whispering to. It took him months to finally admit to himself that he was developing feelings towards his best friend. Feelings that overstepped the bounds of a normal friendship. However, a small part of him knew that those feelings had always been there, hibernating quietly and just waiting for the perfect moment to surface.
The two boys finished getting ready and went downstairs to meet the girls. Rose threw her arms around Scorpius as soon as he landed down onto the floor, giving him a quick kiss on the lips that made Albus want to cringe. Luckily, Lily was there to save him from the awkwardness.
With a sigh, Lily stepped between them. "Okay, okay. Cut it out. If we're gonna go swimming you two cannot be eating each other's faces the whole time!" she demanded. "I'm sure we saw enough of that last year."
Albus wanted nothing more than to say thank you to Lily but she still did not know of his new found feelings for Scorpius and nor did any of his other family members. He was more than okay with them not knowing for now, since he wasn't entirely convinced that his parents would be okay with it. Sure, his mum would probably be understanding, but his dad may need some work, seeing as how not only was his son attracted to boys in general, but the boy he was most attracted to was a Malfoy. Both his dad and Uncle Ron already gave Rose enough crap for dating Scorpius as it was.
The four of them ventured outside and walked the half mile to the small natural pool that was nestled in a nearby wooded area. The pool looked absolutely amazing on this unusually hot day, and it took Lily no more than a minute to climb onto the top of tree where the rope swing was and swing herself into the water.
"This feels amazing!" she yelled back up to them as her head protruded from the water, "Come on in, you guys!"
The three of them followed her lead and all jumped in. The cool water was a much needed relief for Albus. When he resurfaced, he was almost face to face with a refreshed-looking Scorpius. His pale skin glistened in the sunlight and a slight shade of pink was already developing on his skinny shoulders. His blonde hair was swept back enticingly and Albus had to fight every fiber in his being to not reach out and touch it.
After a few minutes of splashing each other and goofing off, they decided on playing "Marco Polo." It was a Muggle game that Aunt Hermione had introduced them to when they were younger. It was fun at first until it was Albus' turn. He wailed his arms for a good few minutes until he only heard Lily's voice echoing "Polo" in response back to him. So he opened his eyes ever so slightly to try and figure out what had happened. He saw Lily in close proximity to him, but she was looking over her shoulder with an annoyed expression on her face.
He followed her gaze all the way to the small dock, and, to his distaste, he saw Rose and Scorpius were perched on the edge of it. Rose had her hands in Scorpius' hair and his arms were around her waist as they kissed each other as if it might be their last. For the first time Albus couldn't turn away like he always had when he'd seen them kissing before. Instead he was frozen, for the first time when he'd seen them like his, he hadn't felt sick like he always had.
He felt broken. This whole year had come crashing down on him. He was losing his best friend and for the longest time his only friend. It wasn't about feeling abandoned anymore, it was the fact that he had feelings for Scorpius Malfoy and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it.
He got his footing, walked out of the water, grabbed his shirt and left the three of them, ignoring Lily's calls and trying every bit to not turn around when he heard Scorpius yell his name.
line break
He and Lily did not say a single word to each other as they returned to the Potter's house the evening. They both said their goodbyes to their grandparents and thanked them for letting them all come over. Rose and Scorpius had finally caught up with them before they left, and they both showed concern for Albus, but Albus just played it off as having a bad headache. When they returned home, Albus rushed to his room and closed the door behind him. He dived onto his bed and smothered his face with a pillow. He laid there for a few minutes before he heard a knock.
"Go away. I wanna be alone." He said through the pillow, though he realized a moment later that who ever it was probably couldn't understand him anyway.
"Well, that's too bad!" A soft, yet firm voice said from behind him. Albus looked up to see Lily standing in the doorway, her arms folded. She walked silently into his bedroom and closed the door slowly behind her.
"I think we need to have a talk, Al." She said, her voice had a gentle calmness to it, very much like their Mother's when either of them got hurt or when their Dad lost his temper.
"Oh yeah?" Albus rolled himself upwards so his back was against his headboard, arms crossed. "And what's there to talk about, Lily?"
Lily sighed. "About you having a hissy fit and storming off this afternoon," she said, with a bit of skepticism.
"I told you I had a headache Lily," Albus threw his head back onto his headboard and stared at the ceiling. What happened to the little sister who used to ignore him?
"Right." Replied Lilly, she lifted herself onto Albus' desk, crossed her arms and turned her head at the ceiling as well as if she was mocking him. "I'd get a headache, too, if I saw the person I fancied making out with my cousin."
Albus' heart sank, "You—what are you talking about, Lily?"
She turned and looked at Albus, "I said, I'd get a headache if I saw something like that, too."
"That—that's ridiculous, Lily!" Albus stumbled with the words. "What on earth makes you think—"
Lily let out a small laugh, "Albus, you're not exactly subtle. I've seen the way you look at him. I'm your little sister, it's my job to pry into stuff like this."
Albus just stared at her in disbelief, he thought he was being so careful how could he be so stupid?
"Just...keep your voice down, Lil." He finally said, his heart felt ten kilos heavier.
"Relax, Al. Mum and Dad aren't home and James is still at training for that new job at the Ministry." She jumped off of his desk and walked over towards his bed, taking a seat on the edge of it. He moved his legs to give her more room.
"I've always sort of known," she started slowly, intently watching the way her feet dangled from the bed, before she finished in a stronger voice, "I've watched you all year, the way you looked so miserable whenever they were together."
"I just... really miss him" Albus said slowly, staring at his knees, "It used to be... well, it used to be just the two of us. And that's all we needed. Or, at least that's what I thought."
"Yeah. But there's more to it than that. It's more than just missing him and maybe you aren't ready to admit that, which is okay, but you really need to talk to him, Al. At least explain yourself. I know he's worried."
Albus looked at his sister for a second, grateful that she was handling this so well. She had come a long way herself in the past year, she was no longer the spoiled brat she used to be, well, she still had their Father wrapped around her finger, but she was much more independent now.
"And tell him what exactly Lily?" "That... I not only miss him being my best friend but that I also want to kiss him?"
He wasn't expecting the last five words to come out of his mouth.
Lily covered her mouth to hide a soft giggle but quickly became serious again, "No, you probably don't have to go that far just yet. Just tell him that you miss hanging out with him, since he needs to learn to divide his time between you and Rose equally, and the rest, well, that needs to be your call."
They both sat in a moment of silence. Albus didn't really want to admit his sister was right but she was. He needed his friend back first and the rest could wait.
"Thanks, Lily," Albus finally said with a small smile. "I'll try to talk to him."
Lily smiled and walked around and gave Albus a hug. He hadn't received a hug from her like this in years.
"No problem, Albus, I want you to be happy." She began to walk to the door, but there was one last thing Albus wanted to ask.
"Y-You won't tell anyone will you?" he asked nervously. "I'm not ready for everyone to know yet."
Lily smirked, "Like I said, as your sister, it's my job to pry but it's also my job to keep secrets."