It never something Ezra would ever like people to know about. Living streets was a hard life and when people found out that you had some sort of medical issue people like to us that to gain some sort of control over the other person. Ezra never like when people did that but when you're on the street you do what you have to do even if it meant telling evil people that you where sick. Some time people where sympathetic about it and would just give him the money other time he had to do some thing for that person before he was allowed the med.
He rolled the container in his hand there where no more he took the last pill yesterday. He knew he was in big trouble he knew he need to tell them about his condition he just never thought he would be in this type of potion. He parents where never shy about his medical condition. He was never felt like he was something to be shamed of or hide about. But… when he had to learn how to live on his own everything that his family ever tight him about living with his condition got throw out the fucking window. He will be for ever changed because of what the empire had done to him and his family.
As he could here Zeb sleeping on the bunk below him. What was Zeb going to think of him? He probably was never going to let him live it down they where not on very good speaking term. At the moment and he didn't think Zeb like him all that much. But hey what you going to do if he was not trying to kill him he was fine with being around the big fuzzy guy.
As his mind wondered to Hera. What was she going to think of him once she found out about his condition? She was already worried about all the other issues he had. She wanted to send him to a off world doctor. Cause she wanted to make sure he didn't have any lasting damage from him being on the streets. He knew he was very skinny for his age and he had not really grow much he was 13 teen and yet he look like 9 year old. Hera said something about because he had not gotten lot of good nutrition that his body just stop doing what it needed to grow normally.
He felt tears fall from his face he didn't know why he was becoming so emotional about this he never got up set anymore. He got use to the fact that know one cared for him. Or the fact that he was alone. As he lay back down and tried to go to sleep but his mind started to wonder again.
What would Sabine think of him? Oh, great he thought to him self wait ago mind way to make him not sleep. As he rolled him self over to face the wall. Subian was not one to judge him.
Only if he tried to flirt with her. He was guy he couldn't help it and it not like he had good role models on the streets. He just didn't want her to think any differently of him. They like to push each other around and he didn't want to lose that.
As he sighed he now wondered when he had he gotten so comfortable around these people he had only knew them for three weeks. He cursed him self little for being so very open.
He knew that was going to bit him. He didn't want to grow so attached cause that when bad thing happen he kicked him self mentally. Come on they where in a fucking war there was no time to think that he could be happy let alone a family that cared for him.
But then there was Kanan telling him to open up to his feeling and that he was not alone anymore. What would Kanan think of him? Would he stop training him was it unsafe to be a force user and have seizure like him? Could that do more harm then good.
What if he over used his power sit could affect his epilepsy. Ugh this was so fucked up. He sighed and rubbed his tired eyes. Maybe some sleep would help as he didn't need to wait long before sleep claimed him,
Hey Hey! As he felt someone shaking him awake. As he curled more into him self.
What he mumbled into the blankets. Leave me alone.
Come on kid Hera want everyone up and to help clean the ship to day. Zeb said in little bit more grumpy tone. He did not have time for the kid to act….. well like kid today. Up! Now! As he pulled all the blanket off leaving the boy shivering. Up now!
As he left the room not wanting to deal with lothrat anymore then he had to.
Ezra sighed he didn't want to do anything now. He felt like his head was pounding and he was so tired. He knew he should get up but his body just told him that he should just stay in bed. He didn't know how much time had past before he was able to will him self to get out of bed.
He slowly made his way out of the room and down the hall to the bath room to change when he was done he slowly made his way to the kitchen and sat down with his head in his hand. It felt like someone was bang his skull against his head repeatedly.
Ezra? You ok? A soft voice spoke to him from couple of feet away.
Am ok Hera just tired.
As he picked his head up from the table to be met with concerned eye. Am fine Hera. So what for breakfast.?
Hera smiled what do want to eat?
Ezra shrugged you know me all eat anything that you put in front of me. As he rubbed his temple to try to ease his headache.
Hera gave him look but said nothing. As she turned to start making breakfast for everyone. Taking glance at Ezra every once in while he look very pale and look like he handed slept in days.
Ezra Know all to well what these headaches meant and he was becoming very anxious. What hated the most of have epilepsy was the warning sighed but not knowing when a seizure was going to hit. As he was bright out of his thought when he senses Kanan walk into the room.
Morning Ezra mumbled not in the mood to talk to anyone. Really all he wanted to do was go back to sleep.
Kanan smiled and grabbed a cup of Kaf from Hera as they both said good morning to each other.
So how are you doing Ezra? Kanan ask in between sips.
Ezra just shrugged as he felt the sensation of Déjà vu wash over him as he sat up straight.
Ezra you all right? As Kanan watch Ezra sit straight up like he had been shocked by something.
The feeling slowly washed away as Ezra shock his head little to shake of the lingering facts.
Yeah am ok just little Déjà vu
Don't you hate when that happens Kanan joked as Hera brought over his hot cereal.
As he took it from her thanks Hera don't worry about cleaning up all do that after am done.
Hera rolled her eyes but she know that it was better for Ezra being busy then Ezra who was doing nothing less reason for him to get in trouble.
So did Zeb tell you what are plan for the day? As Hera sat down next to him
Yeah he said something about cleaning the ship or something like that?
Your smart kid Kanan smirked.
Ezra just rolled his eyes he was not really in the mood for Kanan really bad jokes. So what job do want me to do? As he took another bite of the hot cereal.
You can help chopper rewire some stuff I find that some of are Navigation have been little off lately.
You want me to work with chopper? As he dropped his spoon in his finished bowl. As he sighed and walk over to the sink.
Yes I do. Hera said comely again. I know you and him don't get long but you guys are the only ones that are good at this. So, it ether working with chop or working in the bath room? your choices.
Ezra sighed yeah fine al work with chop. As he brought his stuff up to the sink and started to clean.
As Hera left the room to do some other stuff around the ship.
Has the day ware on Ezra could feel his headache getting worse and he was starting to losing his patient with chopper and with him self.
UGH! As he through his hands up in the air. Kanan gave him a look.
What wrong? Ez do you need a break?
Am fine ! Ezra snapped at his master. He didn't mean to snap it was just he was tired and his head was pounding. He could feel his hands shaking and he know that it was just another damn symptom of his seizure that could come at any moment. It was making him on edge.
Ezra? You there? He was brought out of his thought by Kanan waving his hand in front his face.
Uh What? As he shook his head. Am sorry Kanan what where you saying as he put his hand to his head. Did he just faze out on Kanan or was he just didn't hear him.
I ask if you wanted to have break you don't look that well. Maybe some food will do you some good?
Just the thought of food made him want to throw up.
No am goo Kanan I just…as he could feel his words slur as his vision went in and out as he felt his body lock as his eyes rolled inside his head and he knew no more.
Ezra woke to the sound of a beeping noise as he felt so tried and drained his body felt so heavy his mouth tasted like coper. He wanted to spit it out but he had no spit to even spit. As he could feel the need to throw up was growing stronger by the seconded.
As he started to gag he was to weak to roll over as he felt some one roll him over. As he throws up on the side of the bed as the person shoes where now full of his sick. As the person was rubbing his back and was talking to him but for the love of force he could not understand anything. As he lost concuss once again.
The seconded time he woke he could still hear the beeping but there was voice around him and he could sort of understand what was going on around him.
Kanan the doctor said he was going to fine please calm down dear the soothing voice of Hera could be heard next to him.
I know he would fine Hera I just wish…. I wish he would have told us do you have any idea what could have happened if we where on mission or something like that.
Ezra felt his heart sink he never thought about that before now he just felt plane stupid.
Kanan he been alone fore half his life Sabine jump into his the conversation. Don't be to made at the kid if I was him I sadly would have done the same thing. Am sure once he has med in his system and we keep on his med now he will be fine.
Ezra slowly opened his eye just wanted to get this over with. As he tried to move but his body was so very sore as groaned slip through his mouth.
Ezra?! As he turned his head to see that everyone was in the hospital room. he was hooked up to an IV and heart mentor.
How are you feeling bud? As Kanan sat on the bed you scared us badly Ezra you been out for couple of days. Your body went throw a lot and the doctors thought it be easy for you to recover if they put you to sleep.
Ezra nodded as he looks at his Master as his heart clenched to see that Kanan look like he could fall over at any moment he looks like death. Did they care about him? They even took him to hospital so they must mean they must cared, right?
Hera sighed and ran her hand through his hair Ezra I don't understand you did this to your self why didn't you tell us.
Ezra look away he didn't want to say they would now think he was beyond stupid.
Ezra Sabin jumped in please don't do this to us we deserve a explanation.
Ezra sighed fine he mumbled I… I ran out of pill couple of days ago. I was worried that when you found out about my condition then you would dump me on some un know planet.
when he was done with his story he realized that he had tears slipping down his face. As he whipped them way he was always a rack when he woke from a fit. As he sniff as he felt a hand on his head.
We would never do that to you Ez. Kanan voice sounded sincere and he could feel the force wrap him in warm in brace as he realized that it was Kanan own force. As Ezra did the same as there bond at that seconded seemed to lock. As he look at his master your still going to teacher me.
Kanan shook his head and rolled his eyes. Of course, Ezra am not leaving you like that. Your so very powerful and am not let you down not again.
Ezra shook his head Kanan it was not your fault! I t was all mine.
Kanan sighed I know there was something up but I dint push I should have maybe I could have asked you about what was wrong.
Ezra sighed it not your fault. It My condition fault please don't start playing the blame game. I learned long time that some time there nothing you can do. You just go with the flow. Even if it means I black out.
Am safe now and that all that matter.
Zeb patted him on the back your not alone anymore Loth rat. But if you throw up on me again am throwing you in space do you understand.
Ezra smiled I can't promise that but I can promise that all tell when I don't feel well how does that sound.
Zeb sighed yeah fine I guess that will do he didn't know what came over him as he wrapped his arm around the teen. You scared me kid please don't ever do that.
Ezra tightened his hold on his brother I promise he mumbled am so sorry as he let the tears fall he finally had family and people that understood him and that all he could ask for. Epilepsy could fuck it self cause he had people to help him now and he felt like he could take his disorder down now. He would make sure that he would live through this now he had reason to live.