Disclaimer: Wish it was mine, but it isn't…unfortunately.

Through Heaven's Eyes

Prologue-

If only I had been able to see this! If only I had seen it coming, I could have prevented it. But I had not, and for it, I will never forgive myself.

It was raining, and though the weather was as it always was in this small town of Forks, today it felt so much more potent, as if it was proclamation that the sun would never shine again. I felt like the darkness was closing about me, and though I did not need to breathe, I felt like I was suffocating.

I had to be careful, or I would break the glass window that I was currently peering through. I did not want to add that to Esme's grief. Too much, my mind whispered, and a sob clogged at my throat. Too much had happened, and I had not the heart to repeat even to myself. It was locked away now, in a vault that would never open, buried behind all the good things I could remember.

Desperately I wanted Jasper, his touch, and calming presence, but I was not selfish enough to call him down. It was not only his grief he was battling but everyone else's.

If only I had seen it.

I bent my head and was startled when I felt a hand on my shoulder. It only proved that I was not paying attention. I did not want to look behind me, already feeling the presence of Carlisle. Neither of us wished to speak.

For a long moment we remained silent, staring out at the streaks of water draining down the pale panes of glass. They looked like tears, and it seemed the sky was crying for us, as we could not. But we could feel guilt and remorse, and above that, pain. No pain so physical was as damaging as the one clawing through me right now, this drowning sensation that I could not hide. While the memories were gone, this remained.

"Alice," Carlisle said after a moment, his deep yet soothing voice trembling through the quiet home.

I didn't want to turn to him, but his tone demanded it and slowly my feet moved, but I would not look into his eyes. I was trembling, and fisted my hands. "It was my fault."

"No it wasn't," Carlisle hushed me. He reached out, as if to swamp me in a hug, but I backed away until my back touched the window. He frowned gently. "Alice, not even you can see everything."

"I should have seen it!" I snapped, my voice straining under my grief. "Why didn't I even see part of it? An indication? A possibility? I was attuned to them…I should have! This is my fault!"

"Alice, Alice!" Carlisle exclaimed and this time he held me though I fought to be released, I wanted nothing but to be alone. "No one could have seen this happen."

"I could have." I whispered it in a voice so low, no one other then a vampire would have heard. "I could have."

Carlisle was silent for a long moment, as if he had realized his argument had backfired upon him. Then he drew me away and forced me to look in his eyes. "Not even you Alice," he said, his voice firm. "Sometimes Fate sets things before us, and no decision we can make will alter that."

"We could have tried!"

"Alice, please try to listen to what I am saying."

"She was my best friend and I abandoned her. He was my brother and I left him too. How can you say I could have done nothing!" I wrenched away from Carlisle and fled.

I didn't know where I was going, didn't hear doors slam behind me, or tree branches laden with water dip low in an attempt to scratch my face, but snap instead when I absently brushed them aside.

It wasn't until the grief encompassed me into a hold so tight that I could not break free that I tripped and was forced to notice my surroundings. I lay on the ground, gasping for breath, and clutched the dirt in my stained palms. I ached, my body trembling with a pain I could not feel. The locked memories rose from the vault they had been vanquished to, and an unrecognizable sound rose from my throat and choked its way past my lips.

And that is when I raised my head and realized where I was; though I could barely see, my vision was so clouded by the rain pouring down. Before me sat two headstones, polished, new, yet bent beneath the weight of the two that rested below. Too young to die and too loved to be forgotten, and a life that would never be lived. Flowers, damp and waterlogged, lay strewn beside the granite stones. Against my will, my eyes followed the letters engraved within.

Isabella Marie Swan 1988-2007

Edward Mason Cullen 1988-2007

Gone but never forgotten, in our hearts will you always remain.

I screamed, throwing my head to the sky. I let myself fall back, until I was lying upon the ground. The rain touched my face and cried my tears, but I could not feel it.

I was numb.

A/N: I know you all wanna kill me!! I understand!! But please give this a chance? I would appreciate it, and any comments you give me (even if they are all about you wanting to give me slow painful deaths).