Ballerina
Summary: Callie discovers that Stef used to be a ballerina.
AN – Sorry for any mistakes there might be.
Callie hadn't meant to snoop. She had just been looking for a new book to read when she had found the old notebook tucked in between all the novels in Stef and Lena's bookcase. But it wasn't just a notebook, it was a dairy and it was Stef's. Callie wondered why it wasn't hidden away somewhere only Stef knew. Here in the bookcase everyone could find it and somebody might read it. Callie would never want anyone, but herself to read her dairy, which was why she didn't keep one anymore. In this house it was too hard to keep anything hidden even when you didn't write it down in a book. Callie really wanted to take a look inside the book. She was so curious to figure out what kind of teenager Stef might have been, but she couldn't make herself do it. It would be like violating her privacy, and Stef would never do something like this to Callie without asking first.
So Callie turned back to the bookcase and was about to place the notebook back in its spot when an old piece of paper fell out of it. She frowned and with the notebook in one hand Callie kneeled down and reached for the paper. It was folded a few times, but it looked like an old newspaper clipping. Callie sat down on the floor with the notebook in her lap. She unfolded the wrinkled piece of paper and discovered that it was a black and white picture. The picture showed a young girl about Callie's age – maybe a few years younger. Her blonde hair was in a low bun and she was wearing a leotard, tights and ballet shoes. Callie was confused. Why would Stef keep a picture of a ballerina in her dairy? Was it an old friend? She looked closer at the clipping and noticed a sentence at the bottom. The words were almost smeared away, but Callie could just make out what it said:
"On her toes: Stefanie Marie Cooper – one of the few accepted into the San Diego Academy of Ballet."
Was that really Stef? Callie brought the picture closer so she could get a better look at the girl. She did kind of look like her, but Stef always seemed so hard and protective and this girl looked so small and graceful. But maybe that was just what Stef had been like before she became a mother, wife and police officer. Before she really knew what the world was like.
Callie wondered why Stef had never mentioned that she used to dance or why there weren't any ballet pictures of her in the house. Was Stef ashamed of it? Callie couldn't imagine why she would be, because Callie herself actually loved ballet. She thought it was beautiful and she had always wanted to go see Swan Lake.
"What are you looking at?"
Callie jumped in her seat, startled by the sudden noise. She quickly refolded the piece of paper and placed it back in the notebook, before turning her head around, looking up at Mariana. "I'm just looking for something new to read."
"But why you are sitting on the floor?" Mariana asked confused.
Callie smiled. "Because it's a big bookcase and I was just looking at the books on the lower shelves."
"Did you find anything good?"
"Not really," Callie said, shrugging her shoulders as she hid the notebook under her legs. "Did you want something?"
Mariana placed her hands on her hips and Callie waited for her to remember why she was even there.
"Mariana!" Lena yelled from the kitchen.
"Oh yeah, mama says dinner is ready!" Mariana said with a big smile. "Come, come."
Callie rolled her eyes. "I will be right there," she said and watched as Mariana walked across the room to the kitchen. When she was completely out of sight Callie got up and placed the notebook back in its spot on the bookcase, so Stef wouldn't noticed that it had been moved. Callie wanted to ask Stef about her being a ballerina, but she didn't want to mention the picture, incase Stef hadn't wanted her to know about it. Maybe she could just bring up ballet or something like that and then Stef would tell her about it herself.
"Come on! Moms won't let us start eating without you!" Jesus yelled.
"I'm coming, I'm coming, there's no need for yelling," Callie said with a smile as she walked into the kitchen and around the table to her usual seat between Stef and Jude.
Callie was never the one to speak the most doing dinner, especially because Mariana always had so much to tell, but as soon as the first round of conversation was over she quickly spoke up, before anyone else had a chance to say something. "Is there any dance schools around here?" Callie asked looking at Lena, but before she was even able to open her mouth, Bandon and Jesus asked, "Why?" Both sounding very confused.
Callie looked down at her plate and pushed her salt around for a bit. "I was thinking about taking a dance class or something."
"But you can't dance," Mariana pointed out. "You can't already have forgotten how bad it went when you were on my dance team."
"Callie wasn't bad…" Lena said. "She is just not as good as you, so a few dance classes might help her get better."
"She is gonna need more than a few," Mariana mumbled to herself.
"Hey! Be nice to your sister," Stef said and laid her hand on Callie's back.
"It's okay; I'm not really into modern dance and hip hop like you," Callie said and smile at Mariana. "I was actually thinking that maybe I would try ballet."
As the last word left Callie's mouth Stef started choking on her water. Lena got up and was about to hit Stef on the back, but she held up her hand and signaled for Lena to sit back down. Stef coughed a few into her elbow as she turned towards Callie. "Ballet? Why ballet?"
Callie shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. I just think it's beautiful."
Before anyone had time to comment on the fact that Callie would probably make a terrible ballet dancer, Lena sat up a little straighter and smiled big. "That's a fantastic idea!"
"It is?" asked all of the kids confused as they looked at their mother.
"Of course it is," Lena said as she turned to look at Stef. "What is the name of the dance school you used to attend, honey?"
"Mom can dance?" Mariana asked surprised and with a big smile on her face. Lena nodded happily and drank a sip of water.
Stef didn't seem quit as happy. "Starlight dance school?" she asked hopefully as she took a bid of her lasagna.
Callie could tell that Stef really wanted Lena to drop the subject and she almost felt bad for bring it up in the first place. But she had just wanted to know her new mom a little better and this had seemed like a good way to do so.
"No, not that one," Lena said, shaking her head, "the fancy one."
"Oh…um… You mean San Diego Academy of Ballet," Stef said as she looked down at her plate.
"You were a ballet dancer?" Jude asked with a grin.
Stef looked up at him. "I wasn't just a ballet dancer, I was a ballerina."
"No way!" Jesus said. "I don't believe for one second."
Stef didn't say anything; she just stood up and left the kitchen. The room became completely quiet and Callie was afraid they might have upset Stef and she wished she had never mentioned ballet. What if it had been Stef's big dream to be a prima ballerina, but then she had gotten injured and had had to give up on her dream? Or maybe her mother had died in a car accident when she was on her way to Stef's Juilliard audition! Okay, the last theory Callie might have borrowed from 'Safe the Last Dance', but there was obviously a reason for Stef not telling any of the kids about her life as a ballet dancer. It didn't even seem like Brandon had known about it.
Callie put her fork down and looked at Lena. "May I be excused?" Lena nodded and then Callie quickly got out of her seat and slowly walked into the living room where she expected to find Stef. But the living was empty and Callie wondered where Stef might have gone then. Could she be outside on the porch swing? No, Callie would have heard the front door close. What about the moms' bedroom? She stood still for a moment, but then decided to go upstairs and take a look. When Callie reached the open door she saw Stef by bed. She was down on her knees and it seemed like she was looking for something under the bed. Callie knocked on the doorframe. "Can I come in?"
"Of course," Stef said as she almost crawled halfway under the bed.
Callie walked slowly into the room and sat down on the floor across from Stef. "Are you mad?" Callie asked and she hated how afraid she sounded.
Stef pulled back from under the bed with a box in her hand. "Mad? Why would I be mad?" she asked confused.
Callie shrugged her shoulders, but still said, "Because I mentioned ballet."
Stef shook her head and smiled. "Come sit here," she said and patted the spot beside her.
Callie crawled over to her and looked at the box. "What is that?"
"My proof," Stef said, sounding proud.
"Your proof of what?"
"That I was once a ballerina," Stef said as she pulled the lit of. Inside the box lay a pair of point shoes. She took one out and handed it to Callie. The girl quietly looked at it; turning it in her hand and admiring the silky fabric.
"Can you still dance in them?" Callie asked as she gave her back the shoe.
Stef didn't answer her question, but instead asked, playfully, "Do you want to know a secret?"
Callie nodded.
"You know how I sometimes pack a bag and tell you guys that I'm going to the gym…"
"Yeah?"
"Well, I'm not really working out. At least not in the way you think I am."
Callie's mouth opened in a big O, but then she smiled. "You dance."
Stef shrugged her shoulders and smiled.
"Do you miss it?" Callie asked. "Dancing?"
"Sometimes."
Callie pulled her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. She wasn't really sure if she should ask the next question, but she did it anyway. "Why did you stop?"
"To be honest; I don't really know. I think I just got tired of it."
"Tired?"
Stef nodded. "I spent all my free time in the dance studio and when I got accepted to the San Diego Academy of Ballet then dance just became my whole life. I think it got too much for me and then one day I packed my bags and just left. I went home and lived life as a normal teenage girl."
Callie didn't know what to say, so she just went with, "I'm sorry."
"There is nothing for you to be sorry about, love," Stef said as she wrapped her arm around her daughter's shoulder and kissed the side of her head. "Why don't you go downstairs and gather everyone in the living room then I will show you a little something?"
Callie looked at Stef with a big smile. "Are you gonna dance for us?"
Stef shrugged her shoulders and smiled. "Who knows? But just in case maybe you could get Brandon to play something on the piano."
"I can do that," Callie said as she stood up.
"Good girl," Stef said with a laugh.
Callie stopped by the door and turned towards Stef. "I love you."
"I love you, too," Stef said and smiled. "I will be down in 5 minutes."
Callie nodded and quickly ran down the stairs and continued into the kitchen where the rest of her family was still eating their dinner. She opened her mouth to tell them what Stef had said, but before she had time to say anything, Brandon asked, "Is mom okay?"
"Yeah, she is fine, but she told me to gather everyone on the living room."
"Why?" Lena asked confused.
"Because she is going to proof that she was a ballerina," Callie said as she turned on her heel and walked back into the living room.
"How?" Mariana asked, following her sister.
Callie shrugged her shoulders and sat down in the chair across from the couch. "I don't know. She just said that she would be down in 5 minutes and she wanted Brandon to play the piano."
"Did she say which song?" Brandon asked as he took his seat in front of the piano.
Callie shook her head and watched as the others found a place to sit. She wished for them to move faster and for the five minutes to be over, so she could figure out what Stef had planned. Of course Callie had some idea of what she thought was going to happen, but she wasn't sure.
"Is everyone ready?" Stef asked as she walked into the living room.
"OMG!" Mariana said, excitingly.
If Callie had been the type of person to use the expression 'OMG', then that would definitely had been what she had said too. But instead she just looked at Stef as she stood there with her hands on her hips and a big smile on her lips. She was wearing a leotard, tights and ballet shoes and her blonde hair was in a low bun – just like in the picture. Callie looked around at her siblings and noticed that Jesus was gawking.
"Take a picture, it lasts longer," Jude said to Jesus, making everyone laugh.
"Come on, be quiet!" Mariana said and then turned to look at Stef. "Mom, are you gonna dance for us."
"That was the plan," Stef said.
Mariana squealed. "Oh my God, this is going to be great."
Stef smiled and looked at Brandon. "Would you mind playing something, B?"
"Any suggestions?" Brandon asked. It was an open question, but no one responded, so he just turned around and started playing.
When the music started filling the room Stef slowly began moving around. It was just a bunch of simple dance moves – nothing special, but to Callie it was the most beautiful thing she had seen in a long time. She wished she could be as graceful as her. When Callie had brought up the ballet she hadn't been serious about taking a class, but looking at Stef made Callie rethink the whole thing.
Maybe she could become a ballerina, too.