A/N Chapter 1 has been taken down for revision and editing. Hopefully, it'll be back up soon! In the meantime, enjoy!
Sirius Black smiled, just barely, as he watched his best friend whirl the girls of his dreams. Finally. James and Lily. "I guess I owe Remus 3 galleons." he murmured quietly, nursing his drink.
Sirius Black, unlike his best friend, was slumped slightly against the wall, observing the other attendees, with a glass in one hand. His black tuxedo was slightly rumpled from slumping against the wall, his black hair, shaggy and falling into his face, and his grey eyes scanning the room. For…what was he looking for? "What am I looking for?" he asked himself. He had no answer, so he kept on looking. Only, he didn't see.
What he could see was his best friends Remus and Peter, talking to two other Gryffindor girls, Dorcas Meadowes and Emmeline Vance. He could see his other best friend, James, stealing the show with his magnificent dance with Lily Evans, who was surprisingly good at dancing, as Sirius noted.
And, of course, he could see hordes of girls all looking for him. He sighed. Normally, he would've been out there dancing and flirting, but today? Today, something felt…off. He sighed once more and silently left the Great Hall and retreated to his dormitory. Once he was there, he shrugged off his tuxedo and slipped into a t-shirt and jeans. Then, he grabbed the invisibility cloak and the Marauders' map. He opened up the map. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." The route to the kitchens was clear. He closed the map and folded it away into his pocket. When checking the route to the kitchens, he forgot one thing. He didn't check if there was anyone in the kitchen. And because of that, he would enter the kitchens and someone would already be there. And that someone would change his life.
He walked to the kitchens in relative silence. Some noise from the Great Hall was echoing along the corridors. He tickled the pear and ducked into the kitchen. There, to his surprise, was a girl already sitting at the table. And he knew exactly who she was. Marlene McKinnon.
She was dressed in casuals, Jeans, like him, and a formfitting tee. And she looked absolutely gorgeous. For some reason he felt better just looking at her. She hadn't noticed him yet.
"Well, well, McKinnon! Didn't expect to see you here." he said She looked up and was very obviously surprised, but she recovered quickly and replied "Well, well, Black! Was hoping not to see you here."
He chuckled. "Marls darling, you know you love me." Her response was prompt, "You know you're the only one for me Siripoo." She replied in a sickly sweet voice. "Point McKinnon." he laughed and she joined in. "No, but seriously," Sirius opened his mouth "Don't even make that pun Black or I'll glue your lips together and, ah, shall we say, diminish little Sirius Jr. It's probably already very small though." He closed his mouth and she continued, "No, but seriously, why aren't you at the dance? I would've thought girls would be all over you by now." Batting her eyelashes and pouting she mimicked "Oh Siripoo, don't leave me. "
He laughed, then said "Just didn't feel like it." She just nodded. She understood. "So, why aren't you at the dance?" He asked her. She answered "Just didn't feel like it." And this time, he nodded.
There were a few moments of silence as the house-elves brought Sirius some hot chocolate. Marlene already had a cup. She continued reading.
All of a sudden, Sirius said, "Does Lily like James?" Marlene looked up from her book and considered him. "I think she is beginning to realize she likes him. Why?"
"They're downstairs dancing. They both dance really really well. "
"I can imagine."
"What about you?" Sirius said abruptly. "What about me?" she asked, confused. "Can you dance?" Her expression cleared as she understood his query. "Yes, fairly well."
"Prove it." he challenged. He knew she could never refuse a challenge. "I can dance better than you any day." he boasted. He saw indignance flash in her eyes. "Fine." was her sudden reply. She got up and walked out of the kitchens. He hurried to follow behind her. She turned to him and said "Where?"
"Near the Great Hall." He led her to a side balcony that few people knew about. It was near the Great Hall, so they could hear the music. They faced each other and begun to dance. She really was an excellent dancer, he noticed. Her movements were graceful and precise. And as they danced, they both began to feel sparks. She stared defiantly at him and him right back at her. The sparks were getting hotter. The tempo increased and so did their dancing. The sparks got hotter. By chance, he happened to look down.
"Merlin's saggy left buttock! My jeans are on fire!" he yelled. They immediately broke apart and he extinguished the fire with his wand while Marlene choked on her own laughter. "Oi! It wasn't that funny." he said. She just kept on laughing. "Why are you still laughing?" he asked her. she managed to choke out, tears falling from her eyes in laughter. "Your buttock! The butt pocket where you kept your wand. That buttock has fallen out!" He placed his hands on his bottom and half of his butt was missing.
What happened next was indescribable, but suffice to say, Sirius shrieked like a little girl banshee. Marlene was just laughing hysterically at this point. Sirius turned around, picked up his buttock, which was lying on the ground, and ran as fast as he could to the hospital wing.
About an hour later, Marlene managed to stop laughing hysterically and bring it down to laughing and giggling like a maniac. She went to the hospital wing to see what had become of Sirius. Sirius was lying in a bed. When he saw her, he beckoned for her to come closer. "She had to touch it to fix it." referring to Madame Pomfrey. "I think she liked it a little too much. And now there's a bandage across my heavenly butt and Sirius Jr." Sirius pouted.
Marlene had finally managed to control herself, though she was still laughing on the inside, said solemnly, "It's a little nuisance compared to losing your right buttock." Sirius was still pouting, when suddenly a devilish twinkle entered his eye. "Let me tell you, there's nothing little about it."