DISCLAIMER: All rights to Harry Potter go to J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers. No copyright infringement is intended, and I am not making any money off of this - it is purely for fun. Jaclyn Moriarty owns Feeling Sorry for Celia, which the format of this story is based off of. She also owns all "Associations", "Organizations", "Societies", etc. mentioned, though some were modified by me (PhoenixFlameGinny67) for the purposes of this story (i.e. "Society for High School Runners" will be "Society for Hogwarts Quidditch Players").
A/N: I KNOW! The long-promised story is BEGUN! I'm so excited, and I hope you're as happy to read it as I am to post it. The next several chapters are already written out, and will be posted quite soon while I'm working on the rest of it.
My friend Luna-Moonberry-Lovegood is working on the companion piece to this, called "Cheers, Ron!". I'm not entirely sure when she plans to post it, but it should be soon. If it isn't, you have my permission to PM her with threats. Just try not to go overboard and traumatize her. :)
In any case, a bit about the story before we begin:
Title: Smile, Harry!
Rating: T for swearing, general strangeness and such
Genres: Humor/Friendship, though it could also be classified as Romance
1) Everything is Cannon up until the summer between GoF and OotP. Even after that, most important events will be the same as those written about in J.K. Rowling's story line.
2) THIS IS HARRY/GINNY AND RON/HERMIONE! There will be no other couples focused on, though some may be mentioned, and it will mostly be HP/GW.
3) This is written in entirely letters, notes, and other such things, in similar form to Jaclyn Moriarty's Feeling Sorry for Celia.
4) The chapters will alternate between Harry's point of view and Ginny's.
5) Technically, this is AU.
6) The characters are probably a bit OOC.
7) BEFORE YOU BEGIN, YOU MIGHT WANT TO READ THE PRELUDE I POSTED A FEW DAYS AGO! It isn't necessary, but I would appreciate it - I'm rather proud of it, and if you like Ron and Ginny bickering like the cute siblings that they are, then I'm sure you'll like it. It's called Dramatics.
Key: Letters, Notes, Messages from Associations
SO. Without further ado, I am pleased to (FINALLY!) present...
Smile, Harry!
Chapter One: Harry
Oi, you, Boy! Over here! On your door!
Harry,
We are going out for the day. There is some grapefruit in the refrigerator that you may eat for breakfast. After you are finished, DO THE FOLLOWING:
Do the dishes
Wash the windows
Clean Duddy's room
Mow the lawn
Weed the garden
If there is so much as a single streak on those windows, article of clothing in my Angel's room, blade of grass out of place, or weed in my flowerbeds, may the Good Lord have mercy on you, boy!
These chores are to be completed before we return! We will be home by 5pm this evening. You are not to touch the telly or my Dinky Diddydums' computer. You may not leave our property. You may eat some bread and cheese for supper, then return to your room when you are finished.
Aunt Petunia
Well, it's four thirty, and all my chores are done. I have mowed the lawn, the windows simply sparkle, Dudley's room is cleaner than it's ever been (Does he know you still call him Dinky Diddydums? Honestly, as if Dudley wasn't degrading enough!), and the garden is completely devoid of all weeds.
I haven't gone near the telly or Dudley's Alien Annihilator, I have stayed within the property all day. I have eaten my measly dinner and will be in my room, making no noise.
Your quiet, obedient nephew,
Harry
UNDER YOUR DOOR!
How DARE you write such an insolent note to your Aunt, you ungrateful freak! You are not to talk back to us, ever! And Dudley's name is not degrading! Do you understand?
Oh, and if you can't keep that ruddy bird quiet, I'll shoot the damn thing!
Vernon
P.S. We don't have a quiet, obedient nephew.
ON THE BACK OF YOUR NOTE!
I only did what she said, Uncle Vernon. And you've got to admit, "Dudley" isn't exactly macho or anything.
SHE'S BORED! I'll be sending her off with some letters shortly, so you won't have to worry.
By the way, is it only me who's getting sick of grapefruit? I think the acid in it is rotting my enamel.
Harry
P.S. Le gasp! Was that a joke?
Hey mate!
How's your summer been? Muggles being okay? Well, I'm sure you'll be out of that hellhole soon enough. I wrote to Hermione the other day. I think she's mad at me, but I swear I didn't do anything this time! All I did was ask her if she's still writing to Vicky, and - Oh, that's it, isn't it? This rubbish is all about Vicky Crumb, huh? Well, I'll show her! She needn't get her knickers in a twist over it! (Shut it, Fred! Of course I don't care about her bloody knickers! Stop laughing, Ginny!)
Anyway, Mum's practically having Kneazles over you, Dad's busy at the Ministry, Percy's an even bigger prat than usual, the twins are terrorizing us all, and it seems Ginny's getting more and more like them each day. That mixed with how well she can channel Mum when she's angry is just downright scary.
Well, here's to hoping I'll see you soon!
Ron
Ron,
Oh, it's been just ruddy fantastic! I'm practically locked in my room with nothing to eat but grapefruit, my aunt is dishing out chores like you wouldn't believe, I'm bored, Dudley is a horror, and Vernon's an abomination to human bloody kind. OH! And then there's that little thing about Lord Voldemort having returned that nobody seems to care about! You know, that thing that I'm getting no information on?
Yeah, Weasley, I'm absolutely spiffing.
Right, sorry about that little rant, just needed to get that off my chest.
Well, of course Hermione's angry with you! After all, even I've figured it out. For Godric's sake, the whole bloody school is involved in a betting pool that Fred and George started two years ago!
Oh, never mind, You'll figure it out someday.
Tell your mum that I'm fine, but could really do with some of her excellent Treacle Tart right about now. I think grapefruit lost its nutritional value for me long ago...
Cheers,
Harry
Dearest Mr. Potter,
We hope not to be rude, but...Ahem...
We are appalled! Ronald is your best friend! And you go on with a rant about poor you, you, you right in the beginning of your very first letter to him this summer? Oh, yes. Off to a fantastic start, Potter.
Rather indignantly,
The Best Friends Club
Hiya Harry,
I know I've never written you before, but I reckon after last year, you'll need all the cheering up and scolding about that guilt that lingered in your eyes at King's Cross last term. (Don't deny it, we all know you're blaming yourself...you stupid, noble prat!)
So, here I am, wasting parchment telling you not to blame yourself for the fact that the Dark Git enjoys murdering and that horrid rat of his did his dirty work. And you couldn't stop it. Because you couldn't, you know.
Now, I'm sure that all you wanted in the first place was news. Well, I hate to disappoint you, but I know nothing more than what's in the papers. That's what I get for being the youngest and the only girl to boot - "Ginny, you're too young! Ginny, we must lock you in a steel room for the rest of eternity so that you don't get hurt!" Bloody hell, I'm not a porcelain doll!
And neither are you, which is why I'm sorry no one seems willing to update you on whatever Snake Face is doing right now. However, I can tell you that we'll be moving to what everyone is calling "a new safe location" very soon, which may or may not have something to do with Snuffles. Oh, and Professor Dumbledore is preparing, even if the Ministry isn't. Dumbledore made Ron and Hermione promise not to write anything important in a letter, so you'll probably be receiving a bunch of rubbish from now on.
In any case, Percy is being a gigantic git, Idiot and Einstein haven't wised up yet, Mum's French Onion Soup is still the best thing in all of culinary history, and Gred and Forge are still pranking. They said to say thanks for you-know-what. I'm assuming you do know what, because I don't. I hope you haven't done anything abnormally stupid. Have the Dursleys turned into the animals they resemble yet? If not, I'm sure the twins can fix it.
Do something useful and write back instead of wallowing in self-pity.
Your friend (I hope!),
Ginny.
P.S. Do yourself a favor and smile, Harry. You know you want to.
Ginny,
Is it possible that I could get away with lying to you? If what Ron says is true, then I'd say no. Fine. I was feeling guilty. I still am. But I'll work on it, okay? Thanks for the proper dressing-down. I suppose I needed it.
I guess I am rather surprised that you're writing, but not unpleasantly. You can never have enough friends, and where better to start than my best mate's sister?
Well, thanks for what you can give me. I reckon it'll do for now! Any idea as to when I'm getting out of here? Ron just said he thought it would be soon. How is Snuffles? I haven't gotten a letter from him yet, and he said to wait and send one with the owl he sends - I guess Hedwig would be too recognizable.
What d'you mean the Ministry isn't preparing? Surely Fudge knows something needs to be done!
Dumbledore made them promise that? Why would he do that?
A bigger prat than usual? That's what Ron says. What happened?
I'm definitely using that! Ha! Idiot and Einstein! Of course they haven't. Ron just sent me a letter whining about Vicky Crumb! They're bound to figure it out sometime, though.
Yeah, I do know what. Tell them they're welcome, and to use it well. And to please not tell your mum!
Oi! What's that supposed to mean, Virginia! I don't do stupid things...often...
Heh. No, the Dursleys are still (regrettably) human. (If you can call them that!)
Well, as you can see, I did write back, thank you very much. And I don't wallow!
Definitely your friend,
Harry
P.S. Thanks for the pictures you sent along. Where'd you get them? I particularly enjoyed the artful capture of Malfoy, the incredible bouncing ferret. (Malferret! We can loan him out to first-years, a Galleon an hour!)
I'm certainly smiling now.
A/N: Let me know how you liked the first chapter! Things will pick up, I promise. I just had to establish a few things, like Harry and Ginny's friendship and such. Look forward to Chapter Two in Ginny's point of view! Reviews are certainly nice.
Oh, and yes, I KNOW Ginny's name is Ginevra, not Virginia. You'll see.
~Ari