A/N: New story! Yay! :D

Okay, this is supposed to be a spoof of 'The 12 Days of Christmas' as you can probably tell. I've changed the lyrics to fit the Cahills. There will be 12 chapters, in descending order. One will be posted each day, and hopefully, the last one will be posted on Christmas Day :) Hope you like it!

Disclaimer: We've gone over this. I'm not good enough to own T39C.

On the 12th day of Christmas, my family gave to me…

12 Food-Throwers

"Dinner's ready!" yelled Nellie Gomez from the kitchen. The yummy smells wafting from the kitchen made all the other Cahills stop in their tracks and inhale with delight. Nobody ran for the dining room. They walked lazily toward the room, as if savoring the air's flavor until they had to destroy it with their hungry selves.

"I guess the battle can start again later," Dan Cahill said quickly, a grin still on his face after shooting his distant cousin Natalie Kabra with a Nerf gun. "We have to replenish our energy for an even bigger fight."

"Yep," Hamilton Holt agreed. "Later."

Natalie didn't even smack Dan for shooting her. The sudden growl in her stomach distracted her. She glared and pointed at the blond boy. "I'll get you back later, Cahill," she said menacingly.

Dan rushed for the dining room.

Amy Cahill looked up from her chess game. Ian Kabra was clearly winning, but he had had much more practice against super computers than she had.

"Food?" she said.

Ian nodded. "Food."

Amy stood and jogged to the patio door. She slid the glass open, the chilly December air blowing through the doorway. "Sinead! Ned! Ted! Food!" she called.

The Starlings looked up from their project one hundred yards away. They nodded simultaneously and the boys pushed their rocket-powered snow mobile to the small garage while their sister ran toward the house. They soon caught up with her and the triplets reached the door together. They shrugged off their coats and headed for the dining room, right behind Amy and Ian.

"Yo, dawgs! Da Wiz has arrived!" Jonah Wizard greeted.

A chorus of "Hey, Jonah," resounded throughout the large room.

Jonah draped his leather jacket over the back of his chair and sat down. "So, what's new?"

"Dan and the Holts had a Nerf gun fight," Amy began, "Ned, Ted, and Sinead are almost done with their snow mobile, and Nellie doesn't think her rolls taste right."

"They don't!" Nellie said. "Look at this."

Nellie picked up a roll, aimed shortly, and threw it against the opposite wall. The food hit the wall and bounced back, hitting a very startled British girl in the forehead.

"Dude!" Dan said. "Perfect aim!"

Natalie fumed. She decided to forgive the babysitter, but Dan would not laugh at her without facing consequences. She picked up another roll and chucked it as his face.

Dan knocked it out of the way with his arm, sending it sailing across the room. The bread hit his sister in the shoulder.

Now there were two girls glaring at him. He shrugged, suppressing laughter. Then he lifted an eyebrow, an evil smile on his face. He stood from his seat slowly, fingered a roll, and yelled "FOOD FIGHT!" before launching it randomly. As soon as it made contact with Reagan Holt's nose, all hell broke loose.

Rolls seemed to be the choice ammunition, and with their hard exteriors and small size, they proved to be excellent missiles. Nellie took pride in this – she had most of the projectiles stashed away in the kitchen. If she ever ran out, all she had to do was quickly dash to her stash.

The three Holt siblings were machines as they pitched countless food items at whoever was in sight.

Sinead and Amy had taken refuge under the table before the fight had even started.

Ian was being pelted by various dinner foods, and was desperately trying to avoid ruining his Armani shirt worse than it already was. He would have joined the two girls under the table, but they had pushed him back out into the fray, proclaiming there was no more room.

As the minutes ticked by, more and more food was splattering on the floor, walls, and sometimes the ceiling. The spilled gravy would certainly leave some sort of stain. The ham stuck to the ceiling, hanging there for a few seconds before slipping off and landing on an unsuspecting cousin.

"What the heck!" Jonah exclaimed, wiping someone's soda out of his eyes. "Dude, that is not cool!"

But as soon as the container of sweet potatoes collided with Natalie's dress, you could feel the rage coming off her in waves.

"ENOUGH!" she screamed.

Everyone dropped the food they were holding in their hands immediately.

Natalie whipped out her dart gun from nowhere. She aimed at each and every one of them, fury blazing in her eyes.

"This. Was. Designer," she said through gritted teeth. "Who threw the potatoes?" she demanded.

No one said a word. She studied each face carefully, none betraying any emotion, except for Dan. A bead of sweat trickled down the side of his head. He saw her lips quirk up into an evil smirk and gulped. Uh oh.

One trigger pull was all it took and Dan crumpled to the floor, unconscious. Natalie smiled uncharacteristically and sauntered out of the room, humming a One Direction song as she went to change clothes. The room was still silent. No one dared to even breathe.

Then…the person they least wanted to see at that moment walked in the dining room, his face filled with a happy smile.

"Hello, every – " Fiske Cahill started.

Everyone's hearts collectively sped up as they awaited their untimely deaths.

But Fiske only sighed. "I leave for one hour…" He shook his head and noticed Dan sprawled on the floor, drool coming out the side of his mouth. He closed his eyes and rubbed his temples.

"Clean this up," he said. "All of you. Yes, even you, Nellie."

Nellie pushed her bottom lip out, pouting, because she hadn't even started it, and she had to do the dishes anyway.

"I'll be in my office," Fiske said tiredly as he turned to walk away.

Once the man had left, all heads turned to look at each other in surprise. They had all expected something far worse than just cleaning up the mess.

"How come Dan doesn't have to clean? Isn't he the one that threw the first roll?" asked Ned.

Everyone turned to sheepish au pair standing by the far wall. "No," they all said at the same time.

Nellie sighed.

How you like? You like? :D

More tomorrow!

~Callie~