It's Shiro's Birthday! For he's so jolly and coldish! It's Shiro's Birthday! For he's a 100 year old-ish! It's Shiro's Birthday! For he's so jolly and coldish! It's Shiro's Birthday! We're celebrating today!

Anyone who knows the original lyrics to that song (AND CAN PROVE IT IN A REVIEW) will receive a free cookie shaped and frosted like Hyorinmaru's ice dragon form! ^^

When I found out when Shiro-chan's birthday was, I just had to make this fic in his honor! And yes, I will be making ones for Saucy-cake, Shika-kun, and Squee later. I say that in the fic, don't I?

Enough chit-chat! I don't own Bleach! All I own is Suten...no, wait...I'm not even sure I own myself anymore...

"SHIIIIIIROOOOO-CHAAAAANN!"

Hitsugaya Toshiro's head shot up from his desk, his eyes wide. After falling asleep while doing his paperwork, he had completely forgotten...

He got up and dashed to the window, pressing his face against the glass and looking up into the sky, his worst fears being confirmed as a black shape fell out of a blindingly white swirling vortex in the sky.

"SHIRO-CHAAAN! HAAPPYYY-"

The figure slammed into the ground at high speed, effectively silencing the next fatal words. Toshiro breathed a sigh of relief and was about to return to his never ending paperwork when suddenly a blur crashed through the window.

Toshiro groaned, and smacked his forehead for two reasons. One, because he should have known that falling possibly 50 feet and crash landing wouldn't be able to stop her, and two... "You do realize Squad 10 will have to pay for that window," he told her, annoyed.

She jumped up immediately. "Sorry!"

Her name was Suten. Just Suten, that was all. She was 14 years old and looked like a miniature Yoruichi, except her hair was jet black and her eyes were chocolate brown. At the moment, she wore a white tube top exposing a few inches of belly, a green small hooded jacket, a white short skirt and green leggings, and white sneakers.

She brushed herself off before grinning at him eerily. Toshiro's eyes widened, and he took a step back. "No. No-"

Suddenly he gagged as he felt the life being choked out of him, her arms locking tightly around his neck overenthusiastically. She squealed excitedly, not noticing his distress. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SHIRO-CHAN!"

He only growled, shoving her away with much effort. "Who told you it was my birthday?" he asked. (AN: He doesn't reprimand her for calling him Shiro-chan, because he knows from prior experience that it's completely hopeless. X3)

"Why, the Internet, of course! Silly!"

Toshiro, who was still not completely sure what the Internet was and who told it such private things, silently cursed whoever it was who had invented the Internet. What was the guy's name...Will Crates? "And where," he continued through gritted teeth, eye twitching already, "did you get that ridiculous outfit?"

"I made it! It's your birthday outfit! I'm gonna make a Quincy outfit for when it's Squee's birthday, and a deer outfit for when it's Shika-kun's birthday, and-"

"I get the point." Toshiro sat back down at his desk, rubbing his temples. Barely a minute with this girl and he already had the beginnings of a throbbing headache.

"So, what are you gonna do on this most special of days, birthday boy?" Suten asked, ignoring Toshiro's obvious dislike of her presence.

"What I do every day." The young taicho picked up his pen and resumed writing again. "Signing paperwork."

"NOOO!" (AN: Think Charlie the Unicorn here.) Suten flipped the desk over- literally picked it up, paperwork and all, and flipped it away, scaring the heck out of Toshiro. "Today is NOT Paperwork Day! Today is Shiro-chan's Birthday...Day."

Toshiro stared at the desk debris. "Was that really necessary..?"

"Sure it was," she said in a matter of fact tone, causing a sweatdrop from Toshiro, "but that's not the point! Today is Shiro-chan's Birthday Day and we're gonna celebrate! Come on!"

Befoe Toshiro could accept or refuse, Suten grabbed his arm and dragged him off.

HBHTHBHTHBHT

"What the heck is this?"

Toshiro stared at the scene before him. The overenthusiastic ball of Toshiro fangirl had somehow managed to drag him through the Senkaimon, into the Living World, and into his gigai for what she called some 'super special birthday fun'. But after over an hour of being dragged, escaping, and being recaptured, all that effort had been to show him…

She beamed. "It's an ice skating rink, Shiro-chan!"

"This is supposed to be for…ice skating…"

"Yeah! You know, skating on ice…"

"I know that!" Arms folded, he turned back to the so called 'ice skating rink', where as far as he could tell, the humans were doing everything except skating. Tiny toddlers clung to their mother's hands as they inched along. Teenagers hung out in clusters around the low walls of the rink, gossiping or checking each other out. Screaming kids cluttered the middle of the ice, flailing on their backs like flipped over insects. And in one corner of the rink…was that one kid…

Toshiro scrunched up his nose in disgust. "I don't know what this is, but it's obviously not for skating."

Suten sighed. "Yeah, you're right, Shiro-chan…"

Toshiro blinked at her. She was agreeing with him? She was paying attention to him disagreeing with her? He glanced up at the sky. Hmm. No pigs flying. No blue moons yet, as far as he could tell.

"This is just the Kiddy Rink. Let me show you where all the real action is!" She grabbed his arm again and began dragging him away. "Come on! You're still young, Shiro-chan, let's go!"

"I can walk, darn it! Let me go already! Let go, you little-"

HBHTHBHTHBHT

"We're here!"

Toshiro snatched his arm back as they stopped after two more hours of the exact same routine as before, rubbing it sulkily- though sulkily was not the word he would use for it, of course. Besides, that girl had a strong grip... "Where's here?" he snapped.

"The Super Secret Skating Rink! Ta-da!" Suten pointed at the 'Super Secret Skating Rink' with overexaggerated flourish.

Toshiro glared at her. "This is just a frozen lake!"

"But look." She put an arm around his shoulder and swept an arm in the direction of the lake. "It's quiet, isn't it? No toddlers, no teenagers, no kids flipped on their backs or making yellow snow-"

"I would prefer," Toshiro ground out through gritted teeth, ducking under her arm,"to forget that image as soon as possible."

"Meh, details, details." Suten waved her hand as if dismissing the thought. "Let's go!"

A tick mark appeared on his forehead. "You don't even have ice skates! How the heck do you expect to skate?"

"Well..." She put her hands behind her back and rocked back and forth on her heels, looking to the sky. "I was thinking maybe you could make...ice ice skates?"

Toshiro growled, smacking his forehead and dragging his hand down his face. "Are you serious? I'm not making ice skates out of ice!"

"Aw, come on!"

"No!"

"Please?"

"No!"

"Please?"

"I said NO!"

"Pretty please with a watermelon on top?" she asked in her sweetest voice.

"Well, when you put it that...wait, what am I saying? NO!"

"Fine!" Suten pouted, sticking her nose in the air. "Then I'll just have to buy ice skates. Myself! Hmph!"

Toshiro watched as she stalked off without him, stunned. "She's...actually going to just leave me here?" After a few moments, he found a small smirk creeping onto his face. "This might actually be one of the best birthdays I've ever had! No paperwork, no Matsumoto gone drinking, no Kurosaki forgetting my title, no screaming fangirls asking for dates! For once in centuries, I feel like I'm actually free, and...and..." He sighed, his head dropping.

"And I'm still going after her anyway, aren't I."

HBHTHBHTHBHT

After about three hours of searching through Karakura, he finally found her sitting in a tree in the park, swinging her legs. She grinned down at him, pointing towards the horizon. "Look, Shiro-chan. The sun's starting to set! Isn't it beautiful?"

"If you realize the fact that the sun setting means you spent almost the entire day trying to find a skating rink..."

"Yup!"

He scowled at her nonchalant attitude. "Where were you?" he asked, jumping into the tree and sitting beside her.

"Didn't you hear me? I went to buy ice skates!" She looked up to the sky, putting a finger on her chin. "But..."

Toshiro prepared himself for the ridiculous explanation. "But?"

"But I got sidetracked, and bought something else!" She laughed sheepishly, scratching the back of her head, before reaching up into the foliage above her. "Want some watermelon?" she asked, pulling down a couple of the large green striped fruit. "Psh, of course you do!" Suten shoved a watermelon into his mouth before he could answer.

Toshiro choked and gagged, finally popping the watermelon out from his mouth and giving the girl a watery glare. "Are you crazy? I could have choked!"

"Why yes, yes I am! Thanks for noticing!" Suten beamed, completely ignoring the second sentence. "All fangirls are crazy when it comes right down to it! And all writers, too!"

A tick mark appeared on his forehead. "Why, you..." He sighed, giving up. "Just forget it. You're beyond help."

The two ate their watermelon in silence(AN: Don't ask how they cut the melons, okay? XD) watching the setting sun. Toshiro finished the last bite of his fourth watermelon wedge and was about to discretely spit out the seeds when Suten gave a loud squeal. "IT'S SNOWING, SHIRO-CHAN!"

Toshiro growled, taking his hands off his ears. "Mmh mmh-mmh mmh mmh-" He stopped and spat out all the tiny black seeds, looking up. "What do you mean, it's snowing?"

Suten pointed with another squeal of joy. Sure enough, snowflakes were beginning to fall from the darkening sky, covering everything with bright white.

"See? It's snowing! How are you doing that, Shiro-chan? How are you making it snow?"

He glared at her. "If I didn't know it was snowing in the first place, how would I be the cause of it?"

She shrugged. "Cause you're magic like that," she said, as if that explained everything. "Cause you're, like, the Winter Wizard. Mr. Freezemeister. Frosty the Snowman."

"Frosty the what? That makes absolutely no sense!"

"But that's the beauty of it, Shiro-chan!" She gave him a rare serious look. "Haven't you ever, just once, not wanted to make sense?"

"No. Unlike you, I actually prefer when people understand me."

"Oh. Okay!" She jumped down from the tree, leaving Toshiro creeped out by her sheer weirdness. "Come on, we're having a Nighttime Birthday Snowball Fight!"

"What? No, we're not-" Toshiro was cut off as a large ball of snow smashed into his face with a loud SPLAT. He scraped it off, growling. "I'm not going to-" SPLAT. He scraped that snowball off as well. "Would you stop-" SPLAT.

"Come on, Shiro-chan!" Suten whined, already scooping together snow for another snowball. "Join the NBSF(AN: Pronounced Nubba Siffa)! Join the NBSF!"

He managed to swat away the fourth snowball she threw his way. "What the heck is a...nubber...nubble..."

"Nuh. Buh. Siffuh," she sounded out with a completely serious face, before throwing yet another snowball in his. (AN: And yes, I was inspired by Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs! Flih. Suh. Fdiferf.)

Maybe it was that last snowball. Maybe it was the NBSF. Maybe it was just Suten not making sense in general. But either way, something pushed the icy taicho over the edge. Then, he got an idea. Scraping snow off his face yet again, he sighed, before jumping down from the tree, pretending to give in. "All right. What do I have to lose?"

"That's the spirit!" Suten cheered. "Now we can..." She broke off as he reached for his Soul Candy. "Shiro-chan...? What exactly are you..."

Toshiro swallowed the little green pill, and his Shinigami form broke out of his gigai, who immediately ran for cover. "You want snow?" Toshiro asked, a murderous dark aura surrounding him as he unsheathed Hyourinmaru. "You really want snow?"

Suten backed away as he advanced, holding her hands up in a surrendering gesture, laughing nervously. "Come on, now, Shiro-chan, let's not get hasty! I was just trying to help you have fun, right? I mean, since it's your birthday and all-"

"You want snow?" he repeated, a sadistic smirk forming on his face. "I'll give you snow. Soten ni Zase..."

And let us draw a curtain of charity over this scene...

Le GASP! For once I, the unstoppable fangirl/authoress appear to have met my match- by my own stalkee? Why, this is unheard of! This is an outrage! HOW DO I SLEEP AT NIGHT?

Quite well, actually, if nobody bothers me! Thank you for caring! ^^ And thanks for reading, too- you know us writers are NOTHING without your support! And remember- everyone say it with me:

Flih. Suh. Fdiferf. XD

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Please review!