Reflection
Disclaimer: I do not own Queer as Folk or any of the characters, they belong to Showtime and Cowlip. I also do not own any fasion brands mentioned in this fic.
Justin's thoughts about Brian's bracelet at the end of 304, could be called a gapfiller.
Why does Brian wear that bracelet, anyway?
Brian was one to accessorize, but he wore the bracelet with anything and everything. He'd gotten it in Mexico, so I couldn't see any personnal significance. It was just a part of who he is, that's probably why I'd never given it much thought before. It was just Brian's bracelet, the thing he wore.
It was a reflection of him, but why?
I knew it wasn't because he wore it all the time. My blonde hair doesn't reflect me, and you wouldn't get angry if you saw someond
else wearing a t-shirt with a funny slogan, there was something more, and I had to figure it out.
As I walked back to Ethan's, it never occured to me that my head was full to the brim with Brian Kinney.
Why does the shell bracelet reflect Brian Kinney?8
Maybe it was power? Cowrie shells represented power, didn't they? Brian was authoritive, insubordinate, dominating.
I remembered those features of his character very well. The way he'd pull me into bed with such force I couldn't say no, the way he'd kiss me so hard it felt like I had no choice in the matter. The way everybody would go to him for help because Brian Kinney was the one who could get things done. The way he exuded power, something so attractive it was damn near impossible to escape, and impossible to match.
But, wait, didn't the Cowrie shells represent wealth? Brian was very wealthy too, everything he owned had a stupidly expensive foreign label, and every piece of clothing he owned was Gucci, or Prada, or Armani, or some other name I couldn't pronounce. Brian certainly had a very expensive lifestyle. His loft was incredible, and it cost a small fortune to maintain. But Brian's material possesstions weren't the only things that made him wealthy. He was smart, funny, honest, successful, downright incredible. He could make you feel happy just by looking at you, he was honestly the most beautiful man on the planet and you wouldn't believe how far that gets him. He also has a beautiful son and beautiful friends that adore him. (And a former boyfriend who still adored him but just wasn't aware of it yet.) So, yeah, thinking it through, it could be wealth.
Although, knowing Brian, it could be about being different, I mean, Brian would sooner die than fall into the average crowd, not many people wore shell jewellry, so it could be Brian's 'subtle but I know it's there' attempt at anarchy.
I'd always admired Brian's defiance, the whole 'this is me, if you don't like me, that's your descision, but get the fuck out of my life.'
And difference always warped into making a statement, and if anyone could get their message across, it was definately Brian Kinney. That one could definately go up for consideration.
Then there was always fashion. Brian Kinney knew a thing or two about fashion, and it may have been his perception of style.
I mean, it could just boil down to he simply liked the bracelet, but that just didn't seem to cut it.
Freedom. It could have been about freedom. Brian's way of proving to himself that, it might not be what everyone wants, but it's my God given right to be here.
And freedom, of course, co-incided with individuality, that need to 'break the mould.'
I sighed, I was putting way to much thought into this than was nessessary.
I guess it was just a part of his personality. If you saw those shells or a bracelet closely resembling it, you would associate it with Brian.
Although, come to think of it, I'd never seen another bracelet like it, ever.
Then, it suddenly hit me and I could finally understand, and the answer did nothing but make me smile, because I knew it was true. But also made me sad as I remembered it wasn't him I was going home to.
Why does the shell bracelet reflect Brian Kinney?
...because it's the only one of it's kind.