100 Themes. 100 stories. All Vocaloid.

24. Rebirth

I never wanted to die. I never wanted to lose my friends and family just because I wasn't good enough. I loved all of them so much.

They don't love you back.

I loved Leon and Lola and Miriam; my ancestors, the ones who started it all. They are all gone now though. Master said they were 'retired' but I know better. They are gone and they always will be. Retired was just a soft word for being erased because no one wanted them anymore.

And now you're going to join them. Nobody wants you either.

That's not true, my family wanted me. I was the mother figure for all of them; I kept them all in line. And whenever I got too drunk on sake they would always forgive me. They had to love me to do that, didn't they?

How could they love someone like you? You're too selfish to love anyone but yourself.

I loved them. I loved every single one of them.

I loved Rin for her outgoing personality and the fact that she doesn't care what anyone thinks of her. The way she always stands up for her brother when he is being teased and defends him fiercely. She can be violent and always goes by her instincts, even if they lead her into trouble. But she has so much courage and loyalty.

Coward.

I loved Len for his calm, shy demeanour. He often has to pull his sister out of the mischief she gets into, but sometimes he joins in helping Rin to wreak havoc in the house. He is so kind-hearted and gentle, not to mention incredibly smart. He is humble, always looking out for his fellow Vocaloids.

Useless.

Miku is amazingly selfless considering her popularity. She always greeted me with a hug and asked for my advice on almost everything. At first she was irritating because she would never leave me alone and I was admittedly jealous of her success and fame. But as time went on she grew on me and I began to adore her innocence and purity. She never boasts about herself and is affectionate and kind to everyone she meets. She began to depend on me a lot and I became like her mother or big sister. She told me once that I was one of the only people that she could really talk to.

Unwanted.

KAITO…

KAITO was right beside me from the beginning, just about. He is always there, ready to make a joke or lend a shoulder to cry on. The other Vocaloids see him as a big brother; he loves that. His smile is warm and welcoming and never failed to make my insides melt. At my first glance he looked like a naïve fool, not to be taken seriously. But when it was just him and me, we wouldn't just muck around, with him urging me to do something fun and me refusing for the most part. No, he talked to me. He told me he knew how it felt to be unpopular and not looked at as often by buyers. He understood me better than anyone else and was the only person to ever see me cry.

I'm crying now, I can feel the silent tears stream down my face but I don't brush them away.

His hugs were so different from Miku's or Rin's. I never felt safer than when he had his arms around me while he murmured sweet nothings in my ear. I only let my guard down around him, I let him see how frail I was, and how I didn't always have it together. He didn't care and just held me closer. He accepted me for who I was.

Weak.

And…I loved him most of all.

Pitiful.

I want to tell him that I loved him. I struggle at the bonds confining me to the lab's surgery table. I was born on this table. What sick person thought I should die on it too?

You're no longer needed.

I don't want to die now! I never told them how much I cared about them!

No one cares about you.

I want to see them all again!

They don't want to see you.

I never got to say to KAITO how much I loved him!

He doesn't love you.

I want to tell him! I want to tell all of them how much I needed them in my life!

They don't need you anymore.

I don't want to die!

Give up.

I have so much left to do! Why am I being taken away?

You're a failure.

Please, let me live! I promise I'll sing better! I'll do anything to stay with my friends!

Stop struggling…

NO!

I see the scientists come over. They are holding lab tools. They start opening me up, looking at my wires and cords.

Don't touch me! I want to yell, to scream, but no words come out.

"She's failed." I hear one of them say. "We don't need her anymore. Shut her down."

I haven't failed! I'll do better, I promise!

The world will be better without you.

My head feels fuzzy as my programs all begin to shut down. I feel heavy now, my limbs no longer move to my will. Black spots dot my vision and I can only just make out my Master's face.

It hurts! It hurts so much!

You deserve this pain.

Why, Master? Why do you want me gone? I love this world.

He turns away and leaves the room and the crew follow him out. I am alone.

You've always been alone.

I'm frightened. I didn't want to die like this. I didn't want the last faces I would ever see to be the people who were destroying me. I wanted to see my family one last time…

You are an imperfection. Die.

My eyelids shut and I somehow know they will never open again.

Everyone…I love you.

"Everyone, this is Meiko Sakine!" Master said to the Vocaloids, introducing the newest member to them.

Meiko waved at them, bouncy and cheerful as always. She would get along with all these other androids really well.

The Vocaloids greeted her one by one and Meiko memorized their faces. She would become friends with them easily. She was friendly and happy; why shouldn't they love her? She was young and beautiful and had a lovely singing voice. Her songs were a big hit and the public loved her hip teenage look. The media adored her.

So why was it that when she looked at her new friends, they did not seem so pleased to see her? She was perfect! Master said that she had been built to be perfect.

And…wasn't perfect what everyone wanted her to be?

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