There Kali's lifeless body lay. I fell and cried. That Soc was gone and it was just me, Johnny and dead Kali. Johnny picked me up and look at me. "Come on now Shosh. It's fine." "Johnnycake. how could you say that! she's dead! please... please." Johnny looked at Kali and remembered the good times that all three of us had. "why? Johnny cake? Why!" I just cried and cried. Eventually I ran to the house with Johnny. Jen and Asheley were gone. Probably at work. "She's gone. The woods on the east side. Yeah. A soc did eat. I FUCKEN NO! " I spoke into the phone. That damn person was talking all calm. I hated that. The didn't know Kali but it sure hurt that nobody cared. "Shelbs. Calm down. They'll get here." he spoke in his timid voice that I thought was so damn hot. "I know. I know. Just. She's gone. Please. She can't be. She can't be right? She wouldn't die this young. She is tough Kali Rogers. Please tell me. Please." I knew I was in denial. I just sobbed and sat on the couch. "Sit down with me Johnny. Please." Doing as I said, he sat down and put his arm around me. "Sh. Come on now. You know we can't do nothing." He looked at me. I smiled. I loved him looking at me, I am humble, but I ain't gonna say that I'm ugly. Pretty pretty for a greaser girl. "its just that she's gone. You won't leave me now will you JohnnyCake?" I asked. Scared of the answer. "Shelbs. I know I won't. We've been buds since we been in the horrible place. We've been close." My face turned bright red and i put my face in his brown t-shirt against his small built chest. We were 13 then, but I admit I love will. My door slammed open. "Shosh! Wait. What the fuck is happening." my sister Jen said. She sure was the character. "Ka. She's go...go..go." "shes gone. Im sorry Jen." Johnny said for me. "Fuck no! are you seriously! what the fuck happened!?" my sisters voice cracked. "The ambulance is coming. Your sister. She can't take it." i did appreciate that Johnny cared about me. Jen sat down and cried. Mom was gone and now Kali. Kali was like another sister. We heard sirens. "Better go Shelbs. Don't wanna have it look like we fled the scene." We got up and I saw Kali again. My knees buckled and I fell again. I hope this wouldn't be happening alot. "Come on. Shelbs." The cops came and talked to us. I told the story but was careful so it didn't look as if I was lying. I sure the hell did hate cops. I bet Johnny would have talked but he was even more terrified. The cop left and i cried into Johnnys arms.
The cops were done talking to us and they said they will have to do something, but they said that the Soc probably did it in self defense. When he said that I did something stupid and yelled "BULL FUCKING CRAP! YOU FUCKING PIGS WON'T HELP ANY GREASER, EVEN A YOUNG 13 YEAR OLD GIRL! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU." yelling like that hurt my throat, so I stopped and just started crying. The cop looked at me and said I am going to be took in for disrespecting a cop with such strong words. I looked and Johnny. "Look Shelbs, its not like you are goin' to jail. I won't let them, you didn't do nothing." I heard what he said, but his voice was so hot and he was gorgeous and I hated him to see me cry.
I was tooken in, and they asked me about Kali some more and told me that if I ever disrespect a cop like that again, there will be serious trouble. I was mad the whole time. I had just seen my best friend die and they expect me to be calm?
I was glad when I was let loose. I ran home and Johnny was there. I was so fucking happy. "You okay? I told the Curtis'." I felt so special that he cared. "Yeah. Im Im Im fine. Wha...wha did they have to say.?" I really need to get over my stuttering when I am scared of in shock. "They said that I should be here to help you get through it. You know, like when I was here when you lost your mom. I'll be here." I sat down and cried some more. My mom and best friend. Gone. Wow. I couldn't help but cry and cry. I sure as hell glad that Johnny was there. I layed in his lap and fell asleep. I remember waking up and being scared that he left me. But he didn't. He stayed and was passed out next to me. We were on the couch and we had been "spooning." I shook him and we got up. I saw Jennifer passed out in the kitchen. Weird. I woke her up and said I was going to school. She shook her head and told me to go to sleep. I lay back down with Johnny and silently cry. It hit me that my friend was still gone. Gone forever and never coming back.
That reality hurt me. Its realizing you will never get to see their smile again, or cry with them ever again. I had lost my best friend and it sure as hell hurt. Her parents didn't even like me and probably wanted me dead since they thought I was the bad one. I am shy. I won't disrespect people unless I have too. It just made me shut down. It was me and Johnny. I wouldn't talk to my sisters or my other friends. Chantel really was sad that Kali died. We could barely talk about it. The only time was when we were at the funeral.
It was a dark funeral. Kali liked the dark. She was pink and I was blue, but she did like dark things.
I felt so un-involved when I didn't get to be in with things to be decorated. It felt so unreal, that she was gone. Losing a friend is a tough thing, I will NEVER get over. Just like my mom. I cried for months. I miss my mom, and always will. Kali just laid there. Her parents didn't even care. They always hit her. I hoped when Johnny died, that his parents wouldn't be like this.
"Shosh, I'm so petrified. She's gone and is never coming back. How are we going to deal with this??" Chantel told me. Worry and pain were in her voice. I knew she was right. We were going to be able to go through this.
The ceremony started and people talked about Kali. Their was her parents and family who talked first, then I went up.
"Kali Lorene Rogers was my best friend. I don't think I would ever had imagined her being gone. We have been through so many things and so many hard times. The day Kali died, I ran to get help. Ran, in hope to save her. She was born a greaser, died a greaser. She was tuff. Thats for sure. I am regretting running into the woods that day. But regretting and wondering "what if." all the time isn't going to do anything. She died because she was a greaser and was tired of being talked to so harshly by Socs, and she broke. she wouldn't take it anymore. That Soc killed her. My best friend. I will never forget or get over Kali Lorene Rogers. She died my best friend, and I will always remember her for what she did for me and how close we were. Rest In Piece Buddy."
That was so tough for me. My voice cracked right after "was my best friend." I was so happy when I could just run to Chantel and Johnny. Waiting for me, Johnny held me and I just cried. Crying felt good, but useless. People talked more about Kali, but I felt only me, Chantel and Johnny could really grasp who she was. How she loved her friends and wouldn't take shit from anyone. She was our best bud. Forever and Always. Losing anybody else and I WILL break.