A/N: This is the B plot story to "A Sister's Love," so go read a chapter of that, and then a chapter of this, and then a chapter of the other one, and so on. I was inspired to write this because I adore Stacy, and was always disappointed that they never built on the fact that she knew Perry's secret. Come one guys, how hard would it have been for her to just make Candace look at the ground when she saw Perry flying overhead? But I digress. And if some of the logic doesn't seem to add up in this story, remember this is Phineas and Ferb logic. Enjoy!
Part 1
"Behold, Perry the Platypus, the Temptation-inator!"
Doofenshmirtz paused as he always did after announcing his invention, as if he could hear dramatic music in his head every time he revealed the daily inator. Perry had stopped squirming in the vat of sap he was trapped in, and was now looking boredly at the gun in his nemesis' hands.
"What's that look for, Perry the Platypus? I haven't even told you what it does yet! You see, everyone is always tempted to do the dumbest and most irresponsible things, but they don't, either because they have a lot of will power, or, as is more often the case, the thing they want to do is illegal in some way. But with this device, I will be able to make anyone give in to those temptations they try so hard to squash down! Then, when my brother Roger tries to stop them, I will offer them the chance to continue making those illegal choices if they will follow me instead of him. And thus I will have successfully taken over the Tri-State Area!"
Another pause for inaudible music, and then he went on, "The only problem is, I haven't quite worked out all the bugs yet…right now it just tempts people, but doesn't render them incapable of resisting. But not to worry, it'll just take me half an hour or so, and you still look pretty stuck. You like that, Perry the Platypus? I was trying to buy two tons of soap, because, well, let's just say I go through a lot of soap. But the idiot on the phone heard sap, so that's where that trap came from." He gestured towards Perry and accidentally fired a shot off the balcony. "Oops. Well, whatever poor soul that hit, they probably won't be affected, unless all they needed was a little push to go off the deep end. Anyway, you just sit tight, Perry the Platypus, and I'll have this thing working in a jiffy."
As Doofenshmirtz sat down with his tools, Perry again began to squirm in his trap. But the sap was pulling at his short hairs uncomfortably, and it was extremely sticky sap. As his mind raced to think of a way out of this, he only half-heard Doofenshmirtz rambling, "Does anybody even say 'jiffy' anymore? And what is a jiffy anyway; how is that an acceptable measurement of time? It's like saying 'back in a flash' or 'two shakes of a lamb's tail;' now that's a weird saying. What does a lamb have to do with anything? I wasn't talking about sheep, you weren't talking about sheep. I suppose though, sometimes, people actually are talking about sheep, and then that would make more sense…maybe. But why a lamb's tail, why not an elephant tail, or, I don't know, a narwhal tail? Narwhals have tails, right?" He looked up to see Perry struggling, and laughed. "Good luck getting out of there, Perry the Platypus. Stickiness is, after all, the most underrated of all the nesses. I learned that at an amusement park once."
There weren't many traps that the famous Agent P couldn't get out of, but this one was beginning to worry him. He knew he'd get out eventually; he always did, but on the rare occasions when Doofenshmirtz brought his A-game to a trap, his inator usually worked pretty well that day, too.
Doofenshmirtz finally held up his invention triumphantly. "And done! Now let's test this baby out." He ran to the balcony and fired it at a little boy holding his father's hand. Doofenshmirtz fired at the boy, and was delighted to see the boy grab his father's wallet and run away laughing gleefully. "Yes!" Doofenshmirtz cried. He fired it a middle-aged woman, who promptly ran into a store and came out with a dozen cats. He fired it at an overweight man, who was staring mournfully into the window of an ice cream store. The man let out a whoop and cried "To heck with my diet!" before rushing inside.
"It works," Doofenshmirtz said in a hushed voice, looking at his creation in awe. "It really works! It's functioning properly! And best of all, you're still not able to defeat me, Perry the Platypus! So I'm gonna go terrorize the town! I'd love to bring you with me, of course, but it seems you're in quite a sticky situation at the moment." He laughed maniacally before throwing open his front door and skipping out.
Perry began struggling even harder now, but it was at least another ten minutes before he finally loosened the sap around him enough to spring free. He grabbed his jetpack and flew out the window, scanning the city for Doofenshmirtz. But all he could see were abandoned cars in the streets, and people running wild, and a couple of buildings on fire. It was incredible what that inator had been able to accomplish in only ten minutes. This was getting serious. But he still wasn't too concerned yet; all he had to do was destroy the thing and everyone would go back to normal, right?
When Perry finally located his nemesis, Doofenshmirtz had arrived at City Hall. Mayor Roger Doofenshmirtz was addressing the public, and saying how he and the police force would not stand for this kind of anarchy, and that he intended to make Danville peaceful again. But to his surprise, the crowd did not side with him as they always did. They began to boo him and declared that he didn't believe in free choice. That's when Doofenshmirtz sauntered up with a haughty smile.
"Hello, Heinz," Roger said. "I don't suppose you have anything to do with the citizens turning on me, do you?"
"That's for me to know, and you to find out," Doofenshmirtz informed him. He cleared his throat, and stepped up to the podium. "Greetings, Danville! Since the mayor is obviously no longer concerned about your needs, I suggest that you follow someone more, shall we say, cooperative, such as myself! Make me your leader, and I will allow you to continue doing whatever the heck you want!"
This was meant with great cheers of approval, and Doofenshmirtz only turned away when he saw a little teal hand reaching up towards his inator. He held it out of reach and said, "Oh, bet you want to push the self-destruct button, huh, Perry the Platypus? Well there's something I may have failed to tell you about this inator—self-destructing it won't make everyone go back to normal! It will in fact ensure that everyone stays like this permanently! That'll tie your tail in a knot for a while, won't it?" He turned back to his adoring fans, while Perry stood with his mouth slightly dropped open. Since when did Doofenshmirtz have this much foresight?
He watched Doofenshmirtz take off into the streets again, and then walked off discouraged, his beaver tail dragging behind him. Eventually his wrist communicator beeped, and he glanced at it to see Major Monogram. "Agent P! We've just received word that Dr. Doofenshmirtz has gained control of the town, and destroying his device will only make the effects permanent!"
Perry turned away so he could roll his eyes without them seeing, then looked back.
"We haven't dealt with such a weapon for decades. In fact, the only one who knows how to deal with such cases, is my mother, Mary Monogram. She lives by herself on the edge of town. She's really old. I mean, really old. Like so old that if you put a dinosaur with a—"
"Sir?" Carl appeared on the screen. "Kinda in a hurry here?"
"Oh, right." Monogram cleared his throat. "The point is that her eyesight is long gone, so I'll be sending Carl with you to do the talking. We've just sent you her coordinates, and he'll meet you there."
"Ha! That's what you think!" Doofenshmirtz suddenly appeared on the screen, and zapped them both with the inator. Then he looked at Perry. "No more Mr. Nice Guy, Perry the Platypus, the next time I see you I'll give you the temptation of a lifetime! Doof out!"
The screen went to static, and Perry looked at it blankly. Okay, now he was worried. He could communicate pretty well through hand gestures and facial expressions, and he had learned how to write when training for the agency, but none of that would work with a blind person. But who else could he go to? Monty Monogram was the only other human who knew his secret and wasn't a villain, but he was on a mission in New Zealand, and Perry had no way of contacting him.
And then he remembered. There was someone else. Someone who had learned his secret quite by accident and whom he'd known for as long as he'd been an agent. Perry winced as he tried desperately to think of anyone else. It wasn't that he didn't like or trust Stacy. It was just that she had no training whatsoever, and he would never forgive himself if something happened to her.
But he was unsuccessful, so he found himself on the Hiranos' porch about to knock on the front door, when he heard "Perry?" from behind him, and turned around to see the teenager in question. He touched the brim of his hat in greeting. "Awesome, you're wearing your secret agent hat again! I thought for sure you'd never let me see that again in the hopes I'd forget." Perry looked behind her anxiously, and Stacy shook her head. "Don't worry, Candace is at your house. She's…kinda going through something with the boys. Can I help you with something?"
Perry nodded, and led her into her living room, where he turned on the news and pointed at the TV. Stacy nodded. "Yeah, that story is trending right now. Wait a minute, that's that evil pharmacist you were fighting in here, isn't it?" She watched the TV for a minute, and then said, "Okay, so if he's the leader now, that's a bad thing, right? Is he responsible for everyone following their every impulse?" Perry nodded, and then held up a picture of the inator. Stacy looked at it closely. "Oh, that must be what he's using to make everyone go nuts! Yikes, you'd think he'd be subtler. But what are you showing me this for?"
Perry gave her a look, and then Stacy understood, and leapt up with a gasp and a squeal. "Oh my gosh, no way! You want me to help you?" Perry shrugged and gave her a hopeful smile. Stacy shrieked and hugged him. "Of course I'll help you! Oh my gosh oh my gosh, I'm gonna be a secret agent! Wait til I tell Candace…" Perry put his hand on her phone and shook his head disapprovingly. "Oh right, right, no telling anyone. Secret agent, got it. Well what are we waiting for, let's get to saving Danville, partner!"