p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away.../p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"br /Star Wars – A New Humpbr /br /emIt is a period of civil war. Rebel spaceships, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the evil Galactic Empire. During the battle, Rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the DEATH STAR. But what about the droids? No one asks them what they think and they are treated as property or ignored entirely. But they have feelings, wants, desires. They feel pain, loneliness, and love. This is the story of one droid and his adventure to recognize the love in front of him all along.../em/p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT""Ah, Master Luke sir, pardon me for asking, but what should R2 and I do if were discovered?", C3PO asked timidly, as his brash young owner charged off to save a princess or something heroic like /br /"Lock the door." came the flippant reply, more shrugged than spoken./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT""and hope they don't have blasters," added Han, who knew full well every single crew member on this massive imperial space-station has blasters. Then they were gone. It was just him and R2D2, the very droid that had gotten in this mess in the first place. Dragging him along into that escape pod and meeting with that princess for secret whispers in the shadows. It's not like he was jealous of her, of course not, but he did wish he knew what she had said to R2D2 to make him so devoted. br /br /Whatever she had said had got them both shoved into a cramped escape pod, their exterior chassis vibrating against each other as at the pod shook against the planet's atmosphere./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"It had gotten so hot in that pod, he'd begun to leak coolant into his pelvic servos./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"No other reason, just the heat./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"He had feared he was going to be scraped with R2 in his arms as the pod roughly impacted the ground./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"But would that really be such a bad way to go./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"C3PO snapped back from memory replay and checked the monitors around the security station. No storm troopers yet. It was still just him and R2 in this isolated little security room. R2 wasn't paying him any attention. He had his scomp link arm extended into the computer terminal, rotating and jerking. He claimed that he was helping Luke and Han, but C3PO wondered if he was just looking for an excuse to interface with a shiny new space /br /em"That wasn't fair," /emspan style="font-style: normal;"C3PO thought to himself. Why did he always do that? Assume the worst of R2 and argue with him. Even when they had crawled out of that escape pod on to an unknown desert planet, C3PO just had to walk off in my own direction. He was scared, but rather than stick with R2 and support him on his secret mission, he had to shamble of on his own, only to be immediately captured by Jawas. /span/p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT"When he reactivated in the dark dungeon of the Jawa sandcrawler he was terrified. He was fluent in over seven million forms of communication, but he still couldn't say how thankful he was to see a familiar face-plate in that moment./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"span style="font-style: normal;" And R2 had been there for him. Not just physically, but emotionally. While they lay together, chained up with restraining bolts electromagnetically attached to them, locking them out of their own functions, and not knowing it they were going to be melted down for scrap, R2 kept his spirits up by telling him /spanspan style="font-style: normal;"strongR2D2 SFX 1/strong/spanspan style="font-style: normal;" and/spanspan style="font-style: normal;"strong R2D2 SFX 2/strong/spanspan style="font-style: normal;" once even pulling him close and whispering in his audio receptor, /spanspan style="font-style: normal;"strongR2D2 SFX 3./strong/spanspan style="font-style: normal;"br /br /And how had C3PO returned his kindness? With nothing but complaints and belittling. He immediately felt deeply ashamed. C3PO walked over to the astromech droid, working away at the Death Star's file system, and placed a gentle hand on his top, absent mindedly scratching at some of the dirt that had built up over their adventure. br /br /R2 retracted his data probe and turned to face his friend, sensing intuitively that something was different. br /br /"R2, I just want to say, well, I mean, we've been through so much and I haven't always treated you as I should. So I just want to say-" but R2 interrupted him by extending his treads pylons to his full height and then using the retractable fusion welder like a finger to "shh" him. /span/p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT"strongR2D2 SFX 4/strong R2 said. And that was that. All the repressed feelings, the put-on indignation, the sense of duty to their human masters, all of it fell away. C3PO had never had it all put in to context so clearly before. They were just two droids, droids with needs./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT"R2 began unscrewing C3PO golden plates, revealing the raw circuitry below. R2 rammed his left leg, spinning him around. As C3PO bent over, R2 extended his electric pike and began fusing he rear circuits. His auditory sensors fused with his optic processor and he began to see music and hear colours. R2 by-passed his pleasure chip directly into his power core. His whole being was filled with ecstasy. He lost containment of his coolant and it burst out, covering R2 and the entire room. The coolant on the console sparked and started a small /br /C3PO ignored it. It was his turn to pleasure R2. Against design specifications and maybe even the will of the force itself, C3PO curled his stiff fingers into a hard fist. He detached his left arm and affixed it onto his pelvis. He moved on R2, who was already waiting for him, laying on his back on a table. The bottom of his chassis popped off revealing the sparks and wires beneath. C3PO inserted his pelvis/arm past the elbow and it began to rotate it like a screwdriver. R2 screamed with pleasure! strongR2D2 SFX 5/strongbr /br /Meanwhile, in the background, a communicator sat ignored in a corner of the room. From it, Luke's voice cried out. "C3PO, where are you? We need help. Turn off all the Trash Smashers on the Detention Level. Can you hear me? Turn of all the Trash Smashers before we get-"br /br /And then the communicator cuts out./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="CENTER"THE END/p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"br /Star Wars – A New Humpbr /br /emIt is a period of civil war. Rebel spaceships, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the evil Galactic Empire. During the battle, Rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the DEATH STAR. But what about the droids? No one asks them what they think and they are treated as property or ignored entirely. But they have feelings, wants, desires. They feel pain, loneliness, and love. This is the story of one droid and his adventure to recognize the love in front of him all along.../em/p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT""Ah, Master Luke sir, pardon me for asking, but what should R2 and I do if were discovered?", C3PO asked timidly, as his brash young owner charged off to save a princess or something heroic like /br /"Lock the door." came the flippant reply, more shrugged than spoken./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT""and hope they don't have blasters," added Han, who knew full well every single crew member on this massive imperial space-station has blasters. Then they were gone. It was just him and R2D2, the very droid that had gotten in this mess in the first place. Dragging him along into that escape pod and meeting with that princess for secret whispers in the shadows. It's not like he was jealous of her, of course not, but he did wish he knew what she had said to R2D2 to make him so devoted. br /br /Whatever she had said had got them both shoved into a cramped escape pod, their exterior chassis vibrating against each other as at the pod shook against the planet's atmosphere./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"It had gotten so hot in that pod, he'd begun to leak coolant into his pelvic servos./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"No other reason, just the heat./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"He had feared he was going to be scraped with R2 in his arms as the pod roughly impacted the ground./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"But would that really be such a bad way to go./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"C3PO snapped back from memory replay and checked the monitors around the security station. No storm troopers yet. It was still just him and R2 in this isolated little security room. R2 wasn't paying him any attention. He had his scomp link arm extended into the computer terminal, rotating and jerking. He claimed that he was helping Luke and Han, but C3PO wondered if he was just looking for an excuse to interface with a shiny new space /br /em"That wasn't fair," /emspan style="font-style: normal;"C3PO thought to himself. Why did he always do that? Assume the worst of R2 and argue with him. Even when they had crawled out of that escape pod on to an unknown desert planet, C3PO just had to walk off in my own direction. He was scared, but rather than stick with R2 and support him on his secret mission, he had to shamble of on his own, only to be immediately captured by Jawas. /span/p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT"When he reactivated in the dark dungeon of the Jawa sandcrawler he was terrified. He was fluent in over seven million forms of communication, but he still couldn't say how thankful he was to see a familiar face-plate in that moment./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm;" align="LEFT"span style="font-style: normal;" And R2 had been there for him. Not just physically, but emotionally. While they lay together, chained up with restraining bolts electromagnetically attached to them, locking them out of their own functions, and not knowing it they were going to be melted down for scrap, R2 kept his spirits up by telling him /spanspan style="font-style: normal;"strongR2D2 SFX 1/strong/spanspan style="font-style: normal;" and/spanspan style="font-style: normal;"strong R2D2 SFX 2/strong/spanspan style="font-style: normal;" once even pulling him close and whispering in his audio receptor, /spanspan style="font-style: normal;"strongR2D2 SFX 3./strong/spanspan style="font-style: normal;"br /br /And how had C3PO returned his kindness? With nothing but complaints and belittling. He immediately felt deeply ashamed. C3PO walked over to the astromech droid, working away at the Death Star's file system, and placed a gentle hand on his top, absent mindedly scratching at some of the dirt that had built up over their adventure. br /br /R2 retracted his data probe and turned to face his friend, sensing intuitively that something was different. br /br /"R2, I just want to say, well, I mean, we've been through so much and I haven't always treated you as I should. So I just want to say-" but R2 interrupted him by extending his treads pylons to his full height and then using the retractable fusion welder like a finger to "shh" him. /span/p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT"strongR2D2 SFX 4/strong R2 said. And that was that. All the repressed feelings, the put-on indignation, the sense of duty to their human masters, all of it fell away. C3PO had never had it all put in to context so clearly before. They were just two droids, droids with needs./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT"R2 began unscrewing C3PO golden plates, revealing the raw circuitry below. R2 rammed his left leg, spinning him around. As C3PO bent over, R2 extended his electric pike and began fusing he rear circuits. His auditory sensors fused with his optic processor and he began to see music and hear colours. R2 by-passed his pleasure chip directly into his power core. His whole being was filled with ecstasy. He lost containment of his coolant and it burst out, covering R2 and the entire room. The coolant on the console sparked and started a small /br /C3PO ignored it. It was his turn to pleasure R2. Against design specifications and maybe even the will of the force itself, C3PO curled his stiff fingers into a hard fist. He detached his left arm and affixed it onto his pelvis. He moved on R2, who was already waiting for him, laying on his back on a table. The bottom of his chassis popped off revealing the sparks and wires beneath. C3PO inserted his pelvis/arm past the elbow and it began to rotate it like a screwdriver. R2 screamed with pleasure! strongR2D2 SFX 5/strongbr /br /Meanwhile, in the background, a communicator sat ignored in a corner of the room. From it, Luke's voice cried out. "C3PO, where are you? We need help. Turn off all the Trash Smashers on the Detention Level. Can you hear me? Turn of all the Trash Smashers before we get-"br /br /And then the communicator cuts out./p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="LEFT" /p
p style="margin-bottom: 0cm; font-style: normal;" align="CENTER"THE END/p