(A lot of imagination is needed for this joke .)
Back in the days when they still had capital punishment in Australia, and tram conductors on the trams, and the electric chair (ok so there never was the electric chair in Australia… but who cares??), there was a tram conductor. He was having a bad day. A little old lady came on the tram, and he asked her for her ticket. She replied:
"Oi! I don't 'ave one". He lost it, and threw her out of the train, and she got hit by an on-coming semi trailer, and se died.
The conductor got found guilty of murder, and he got sentenced to death on the electric chair. He got put in jail, and he was asked what he would like for his last meal.
"I want Bongo pear custard" he said. The jail chef was confused he had never heard of Bongo pear custard before. So he researched it.
He found out that the Bongo pear is found in on an island in the middle of a lake, in the middle of a forest, in the heart of Africa. He also found that there was only one Bongo tree left, and that tree gave only one pear every ten years. The chef also found out the next time that a pear would be available: seven years to go.
Seven years later, they flew to Africa, and got the pear. But just as they were nearing their plane, a monkey snatched the pear away.
So they waited ten years. This time, they took some soldiers, and the soldiers shot all the monkeys within a hundred mile radius, and they got the pear on the plane. While they were flying back to Melbourne, the plane crashed into the ocean! And the pear was lost, yet again.
So they waited ANOTHER ten years. This time, they flew in, shot the monkeys, hopped on the plane. But this time, they put they pear in a super high-tech box, with radio tracking devices, it was unsinkable, bomb-proof, bullet-proof, un flammable… it was as high-tech as you can get! So they got the pear back to Australia, but when they arrive, they find out that the chef has no idea how to cook bongo pear custard. By the time they have found a chef who can, the pear has gone off.
SO ANOTHER TEN YEARS GO BY. In these ten years, they get a chef who CAN cook bongo pear custard. Ten years, they shoot the monkeys, put the pear in the box, and fly back.
The chef prepares the Bongo pear custard, all rich and creamy. The conductor eats it, slowly, and when he is done, he is taken away to the electric chair.
They strap him it, put his foot in the bucket of water, then they put the electricity on.
Nothing happens they put more electricity in.
Still nothing happens. They shut the power to the rest of the prison.
Nothing. The conductor chuckles. They shut off the power to the rest of the town.
Nothing. The conductor starts laughing. They hut off the power to the region.
Still nothing. The conductor laughs louder. They shut off the power to the state.
Nothing. Not even a tiny zap. They shut off the power to the entire country. But nothing happens. The conductor hoots with laughter.
The prison officials were baffled. They ask the guy.
"This bongo pear custard. What was in it?" the conductor shrugs
"I don't know."
"Then why can't we electrocute you?" the conductor breaks into a wide grin.
"I'm just a bad conductor!!!"