Depression is a really bad thing, I know from experience, it's not good. With depression comes other things too, like cutting for example. I used to be so depressed that if something pissed me off, or something made me really sad, then I'd make one cut, but if it was something horrible I'd make like three cuts, that time was bad for me. I'll tell you my personal story of how I made it through my 8th grade year.
It was summer time, and I had just come back from my dad's house and my two year old kitten had run away, then when school started, I went down to a creek behind my house, and there it was, a skelliton of a cat, with a collor on. When I saw her I cried for a week. Then, someone new came to school, and he ended up being our friend, his name was Jonathan and he was such a perve, but still our friend, and he was such a spaz that we ended up calling him...Spaz. I owe him one, he's the one who helped me get my new best friend, we still are best friends, more like sister's but, I'll tell you about her later.
Anyway, Spaz, he was the one who told me about cutting, he said it was bad, and well, I thought that it would help me, so that's when I started cutting, that got him pissed, when he saw my cuts for the first time, he slapped me across my face, I felt so horrible, then not even a month later, he was having problems, because his dad wantedhim back in Oklahoma, that's where he's from, and well, it ended up that I was the first person that he told, and he said, "I'm leaving today". When he said that, I laughed be cause I didn't think that he was serious, then he said, "I'm serious, and I'm sorry". My whole facial expression changed, the look on my face was a look of shock. I looked at him and said, "Hhmm, that's...nice." and walked to class. During class, I was crying so hard that the teacher pulled me out in the heall to talk to me. I told him everything about how he was leaving today. When class was over, I walked next door, because our classes we're next to each other, I stared at him, then, in a sudden motion, I slapped him across his face and ran down the hall. Even now, when I think of that moment, I can't help but cry. Even though that's when I started to cry again, I just kept walking to the lunch room, I gave him a hug, the very last physical contact that I had made with him. He had to go back up stairs to get his stuff and Jimmy, one of our other friends, who went up with him. I had my head down on the table crying my eyes out, I looked up, and their was Jimmy, sitting right in front of me. I looked out the window, and there he was, Spaz was looking back at the window, and I swear that he was looking straight at me. I layed my head down on the table and didn't eat my lunch. For the rest of the day, I just cried, not paying attention to what I was doing. Later that night, he called me and we talked for a little. I remember it like it was yesterday, I told that I loved him, and he said, "There's better guys out there for you than me.", and he hung up, and that was the last time I ever heard from him. On the 26th of November, it'll be two years that he's been gone and hasn't called anyone. I'm starting to think that he was a figment of my imagination. I miss him so much, it's so hard to keep him out of my mind. Anyways, I'll stop talking about Spaz, he's gone now, and never gonna come back. Trinity, wow, hmm, she was my best friend. I don't have much to say about her. We were THE perfect pair of friends, Spaz was the one who made us meet, and if I ever see him again, I'll have to thank him. After we became great friends, she moved to Fort Hood. I never really talk to her anymore, she has her life, and I have mine. One of my other friends I met this year, Jimmy, oh wow, he was just amazing, but we had more of a brother/sister relationship. After Spaz left, he just went into a great depression, I was really worried about him, everytime someone tried to see how he was doing, or try to cheer him up, he'd run away. He's still like that, but he won't run away unless he really desides he needs to, which is like every now and than. Another one of my friends is John. He was one of those type of friends that was the weird comedian. He's still really funny, but he doesn't hang out with us anymore that much.
And that's pretty much how it was....moral of story: Depression is bad, don't get sucked into it, please. I still have sympoms of it, but I don't cut myself anymore. And I have Spaz to thank for that.