Evil: (depressed) Mmph… 1st chapter.

Allen: Hey, why are you so depressed, Evil ?

Evil: Sticker.

Allen: Huh ?

Evil: Sticker.

Lavi: As in the kind of stamp-like thingy sticker ?

Evil: (even more depressed) Sticker…

Lavi: Is 'sticker' you boyfriend or something ?

Evil: (slaps Lavi) Idiot. (leaves the room)

Everyone: (silence)

Allen: I coulda sworn I saw her crying…

Everyone (except Lavi): You made her cry…

Lavi: (shocked) I… got slapped ?

Lenalee: Trust me, you really went overboard this time. I'm gonna go find her. (leaves the room)

Komui: Aak ! Lenalee-chan, wait for me ! (goes after Lenalee)

Lavi: (silent)… (snaps up) Hey wait ! I'm coming along too ! (rushes out)

Allen: Should I go with them… ?

Bookman: Of course you should, wise guy. At least that brat had the sense of doing something sensible for once.

Allen: Eh, I thought you're supposed to be smarter than me ? (At least, that's what Hoshino-sensei said…)

Bookman: Of course I am.

Allen: Then why did you call me a wise guy?

Bookman: It's a sarcastic comment, dimwit. There, is that better ?

Allen: No. (frowning)

Bookman: Then go kiss Ms Lena.

Allen: What ?! (blushing in anger)

Bookman: It'll make her less angry at you. That's common sense, which proves just how dimwitted you really are.

Allen: Oi ! Wha- what are you doing ?! I didn't ask for this ! (gets pushed out by Bookman)

Bookman: Ah, peace… Enjoy Chapter 1 !

Chapter 1: A long, boring year

"What ?!"

"You're kidding."

"No way."

"Impossible."

"Why… ?"

"You can't be serious."

"I'm sorry, Lenalee-chan, but I am serious and I sincerely apologise. Although, it will help you to learn other things than destroying akuma. Besides, the Earl of Millenium hasn't made a move for almost a month now. Anyway, if akuma appear, you can just destroy them on the spot," Komui stated firmly, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose, "The only ones who are given the choice of going are the Generals, Bookman, some exorcists who have yet to be named, and of course, Lenalee-chan !" (A/N: Sorry for the long long paragraph, but there's going to be another one later. You don't read that, it's nonsensical. I myself don't know what it means.)

"This isn't like you at all, brother…" Lenalee said, sweatdropping, while the other exorcists all groaned.

"Now, as for those who this is compulsory for…" Komui resumed. Allen and Lavi's heads snapped up hopefully.

"Please don't call us…"

"Lavi- "

"Gaaaargh !"

"Allen- "

"Aaaaargh !"

"Krory- "

"Boohoohoo…"

"Miranda…"

Silence.

"Okay, no others."

Sighs of relief. And then, they realised it.

"Why does Yuu get an exception ?! It's not fair !" Allen and Lavi whined in unison.

"Don't you dare call me by my first name, or I'll slice off your head ! Especially you, beansprout…" Kanda threatened, pointing his sword at both Allen and Lavi's necks, with his serious-scary expression. Excpet now, it was scarier. All three exorcists had already activated their anti-akuma weapons, Lavi's hammer big enough to crush Kanda to the size of an ant. Allen and Lavi were shooting Kanda death glares, and vice versa.

"Um, I'll join in, if that makes you two feel better (and stop complaining)," Lenalee volunteered.

"Yeah !" the two energetic boys cheered, rejoicing as they each slung one arm round Lenalee's shoulders supportively.

"Aak ! You got within the 1 metre radius of my Lenalee-chan ! And you're touching her !" Komui shrieked, as if the world was about to end and the Millenum Earl was attacking them at that present point of time.

The result ? Komui flung Allen and Lavi away, sending them flying through the rooftop.

"What power…" Krory murmured enviously, watching Allen and Lavi flying farther and farther into the distance, until they were a speck in the sky and finally disappeared.

"Too bad he isn't an exorcist," Miranda agreed, and they both nodded their heads.

"You aren't going after them ?" Krory then asked Lenalee curiously.

"It would be pointless if I did. They'll come back here on their own," Lenalee said, shrugging her shoulders.

"But wouldn't it be faster if you went to fetch them using your ability ?" he asked her once again, wanting to confirm what she had just said.

"No, they'll be back here in 3… 2…" Lenalee replied, counting down to the 'climax'.

"1."

And Allen and Lavi came crashing through the roof with Lavi's hammer, which had been made big enough to let them hold on to it and jump back to the headquaters, creating another bigger, more-expensive-to-repair hole, only to get kicked in the side of their heads by Bookman.

"Dimwits ! Brats ! Idiots ! You could have taken the back door instead of the roof, for your information !" Bookman scolded menacingly.

"FYI, Panda, we didn't know there was a back door at all," Lavi replied insolently, rubbing the part of his head where he had been kicked.

"But there is a back door, right ?" Allen asked pathetically.

Bookman nodded in response, saying, "Mmm," in the same monotonous voice Allen had used.

"Whaaaa ! What have you done to the roof ?!" a group of Finders exclaimed in agony.

"That aside," Komui continued with a cough, ignoring the Finders' murderous intent, "All activities will begin tomorrow, so pack up any essential items and make sure you're ready for a full year of- "

"A full year of boredom, lazing about, sleeping and all the words you get when you check a thesaurus," Lavi cut in, yawning. He looked as if he was about to nod off already.

Komui glowered at Lavi, a somewhat-murderous intent building up inside him. Only somewhat, because nothing could cause him to go wild and lash out all his anger unless any guy got within his rule of a 1 metre radius around Lenalee. Especially Bak.

"You do realise that there will be lots of cute girls for you there, Lavi," Komui stated matter-of-factly.

With his common exclaim, "Strike !", Lavi went into his bulging-heart-shaped eyes mode, a kind of mode no one except he himself experienced.

"Um…" Allen murmured, raising his hand and sweatdropping at the back of his head.

Komui grinned. "Ah, Allen-kun, you're off to a very good start." (A/N: Don't understand anything ? Read the next line. But don't bother to read the paragraph after that, it's nonsensical.)

"Why do we have to go to school in the first place ?" Allen asked, although he very well already knew the answer.

(A/N: A somewhat-gentle reminder, DON'T BOTHER TO READ THIS PARAGRAPH.) "It will benefit all of you because by the end of the year, you will be on the same standard as others who are of the same age as you are. For the reason that you are exorcists, people look up to you and respect you. Exorcists are expected to excel in everything, including studies, because that would be a backdrop and others would start to look down on us as we would know less than them in a particular area, hence putting us to shame," Komui explained, who was actually reading aloud from his piece of paper. Most of them didn't actually understand a word he had said.

"Brother… how long are the curriculum hours ?" Lenalee asked curiously, hoping she hadn't already volunteered for something that was way beyond her.

"Oh, you are to leave home at any time you wish, but classes begin at 5.30am and end at 7pm, including your time taken up for co-curriculum activities," (A/N: What we call CCAs.) Komui told her, in fact addressing everyone, "So that means a total of 13 and a half hours. Breakfast and lunch are included, but you'll have to eat dinner when you get back. If you work hard, you'll get a buffet spread for lunch."

Allen brightened up at his last sentence. "BUFFET !" his mind kept screaming, drooling absentmindedly.

"All right then, off to bed with you, and remember to pack your belongings," Komui issued them a final reminder/warning.

Allen hurried towards the glamorous thirty-storey building, which didn't look much like a school. In fact, it didn't look like a school at all ! (A/N: From my imagination, that is.) He had actually bothered to count the number of floors there were, and had spent a full five minutes just standing there and gaping.

"Gosh, I'm going to be late, I'm going to be late !" Allen thought worriedly, feeling sick in his stomach.

"Allllennnn, grab onnnn !" Lavi yelled to him from far behind.

Allen whipped around, only to see his good friend gripping on to his hammer for dear life. He sweatdropped. At the rate it was going, he'd only have a millisecond to grab onto it ! "Then again… I wouldn't want to get into trouble for breaking the building down," he thought.

He turned back towards his destination, trying to ignore the sound of wind coming from Lavi's hammer.

Suddenly, he heard a thud behind him, causing him to whip around again.

There, a few centimeters behind his right foot, was Lavi, his face flat on the cemented pavement. "I think it ran out of gas…" Lavi muttered.

Allen sweatdropped once more. "Eheh heh heh… We'd best be going," he suggested, leaving Lavi behind in the dirt.

"W-wait for me…" Lavi said, standind up lazily, wobbling from the impact.

And as Allen tried to ignore his fellow redhead, he thought, "This is the start of a long, boring year…"