A/N: okay, this is a little idea I had for a Rick/Beth story. I'm really not sure how this first chapter worked out but if y'all think I should continue it or not, please let me know.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Walking Dead or it's characters.

Used

Chapter 1

Beth's pov-

I remember that first day when he walked up to me, he was a perfect gentleman.

Of course I saw his wedding band but when he touched me, that was it.

I had seen the picture of his wife and son that he carried in his wallet but when we were together, none of that mattered anymore.

I had never intended for things to go as far as they did or for as long as it had.

I wanted so badly to come clean about what we had done but I had gotten myself into a situation where I was willing to keep somethin' hidden. Even from him and even if I knew how much it would hurt everyone if they knew the truth.

It was too late to do anythin' about it now. We, or should I say I, was in over my head.

I wiped my face as the doctor handed me my newborn baby girl and my heart began to race.

Looking down at her and around the room at my family, I knew what I had to do. It wasn't that I didn't want her or that none of us loved her. She was a reminder of what I had done.

Even if I had told my family every detail, I would always know the truth.

Mama and Maggie were waitin' with me while the lady from the agency talked me through the process.

"How old are you?" she asked.

"I'm 18."

"Is there a reason you want this?"

I looked at mama holdin' her, "Yes ma'am. I can't take care of her."

"Well, it seems you have a good support system and help here..."

"I know. But I plan on goin' out of state for college and I can't raise her on my own."

"Do you know who the father is?" she asked.

"No ma'am," I lied.

She continued to ask questions and told me what I could expect over the next few weeks.

We were allowed to take her home for a few days to make sure I had the chance to change my mind.

I held her as much as I could and so do everyone else.

They all begged me to keep her, said they'd all pitch in and help. But I couldn't.

Mama and daddy loved her and so did Shawn and Maggie. They tried to find ways to change my mind but they didn't work.

Our time with her flew by and before we knew it, she was gone.

The lady assured us they'd find her a good home and I prayed they did.

It's been eight months since I last saw her and five months since everythin' around us started changin'.

Mama and Shawn got sick and daddy and Maggie went back to treatin' me like a kid.

I know they're tryin' to protect me from whatever sickness is goin' around but that just leaves me with too much time to think.

I heard all the shouts downstairs and things bein' thrown around.

"Bethie, we need your help," Maggie said bustin' into my room.

She hurried into the guest room after tellin' me to get a bowl of water and bring it in there because Otis had accidentally shot a little boy.

I filled a bowl and carried it to the guest room.

My heart stopped beatin', my eyes widened and the only thing I could hear was the sound of the bowl shattering on the floor when his eyes locked with mine.

"Get her out of here," daddy told Maggie, "she doesn't need to see this."

"I'm sorry," she told daddy before she pulled me out of the room.

Maggie helped me upstairs and began apologizing for askin' me to help.

It took me a few minutes to get over the shock but when I did, I realized Maggie and probably everyone else, thought I was shocked at the amount of blood that was coverin' the little boy but that wasn't it.

It was him. I was in shock because I never expected to see him again.

I laid back on my bed and started cryin' when Maggie left.

I couldn't believe how stupid I was. I still can't believe it now.

"Bethie," Patricia woke me up the next mornin', "we have visitors. Please come help us in the kitchen."

"Yes ma'am," I said as I rolled out of bed.

I didn't want to see him but I couldn't let anyone know who he was.

As far as they knew, my ex boyfriend Jimmy had been the baby's father.

I buried my face in my hands.

What would mama and daddy say or think if they found out what I had done?

It was hard enough when everyone in town found out that I was pregnant. I could only imagine how much harder of would've been if they had know the baby's father was older, married and had a kid.

I can imagine how bad things are gonna be when daddy finds out the truth.

I remember the looks I'd received and how everyone would shake their heads when they saw me.

"It's such a shame. You're mother and father are such good Christians." I heard that from more than a few people.

Before I left my bedroom, I said a silent prayer that he wouldn't be here long.

I remember everythin' about our last night together.

"I'm gonna leave her," he told me one night. After that, it became a constant reassurance whenever we were together. Even on the night I ended it.

"No you're not," I told him, "You're gonna leave here, go home to your wife and son and you're gonna forget about me."

"Beth," he brushed his thumb across my cheek, "I'm leavin' her. I've been talkin' to a lawyer."

I shook my head.

I had been such a fool but I was no longer willing to put myself through whatever it was between us.

I turned away from him when he tried to kiss me. This was it. I tried my best not to lose my nerve as I walked away.

He called and texted but I couldn't be that girl anymore. I couldn't be someone I hated. Even if I loved him, it wasn't fair to his wife, his son or myself to continue.