first levihan fic! i missed levihan week and i don't think this has something to do with its prompts so sorry! ENJOY! R&R! (I won't do the disclaimer cause its obvious i ain't isayama sooo...)
It was another expedition for the scouting legion, everything seems fine, no titans have been bothering them for a while now, its odd but, they just thought that maybe its their lucky day, maybe no one will be devoured or maybe titans finally had some pieces of minds that they thought that eating humans isn't right, that's actually impossible but hey! Better stay optimistic cause maybe this day might just be the day they'll all die, and to be honest, that's what Levi is just being oh so worried about,(more worried than he usually is.) death. Levi isn't worried about his own death though, he's scared of Hanji's death. Hanji and him have been together for months now, they were really happy, the scouting legion was even surprised to see Levi actually smiling a little since. Hanji and Levi tried to keep it a secret but, because of Levi's jealousy to Moblit since it looks like Hanji and him looks some kind of a 'couple' (even though they're not, Levi is just really a jealous type sometimes), all of the members of the scouting legion found out when Levi accidentally spilled the beans when Hanji and Moblit was doing a research, and he was jealous of the thought that another man was saving his Hanji from her own stupidity.
Today's expedition, Levi and Hanji didn't have the same spot in the formation, he's stuck protecting the brats of the 104th trainee squad, and its getting a little harder since his old squad members was killed by the female titan a while back then.
Levi is worried that what if the soldiers Hanji's with doesn't have enough strength to save her, or maybe Hanji's addiction of capturing titans might get her killed. But still, Levi trusts Hanji, he knows that they promised the other night to stay alive till the end, so when the day comes, they'll finally get married, have children who'll be able to have a happy life not living in fear of the titans inside the prison-like walls, but the thing is, there are times when that promise can't be fulfilled, many titans are lurking still in the world, willing to kill them anytime.
After a while, the scouting legion finally encountered titans, some were already devoured but some are still standing and fighting, like Levi.
Levi was inside a forest with the 104th trainee squad. The trainees was incharge with the smaller titans to make it easy for them, while Levi is incharge with the bigger ones.
"You stupid looking fuck, why don't your kind just die already and let us live in peace just for once, after years of fighting you I'm already getting tired of your shitty faces," Levi was on top of a 13 meter class, insulting it like it can even understand him. He was about to kill the titan he was on but, some shiver came through his spine like something has happened, and it was not good, he tried to shake it off, and it worked, well, kind of. He still is worried about something bad, but he didn't know what, so he just focused on the mission.
After hours of killing titans and titans killing them, it was time for them to finally retrieve. They were entering the walls, hearing insults from the people around them, but they didn't mind that, mostly Levi. Because Levi was riding around his horse asking almost all who had survived about Hanji, not minding about the insults but instead minding about the fact that Hanji didn't approach him after the expedition, he didn't see her since they got out of the walls, and its making him worry.
Back at the HQ Levi is still looking for Hanji, but no one seems to know, although everyone who Levi asked about Hanji couldn't look him in the eye, only stuttering or mumbling a 'no' for an answer, and this caused Levi to worry more. Finally, he thought of asking Erwin to look for answers, he headed to the commander's office as fast as he could, not minding those who greets him and finally, he reached Erwin's door.
"Oi Erwin! Where's Hanji!" Levi yelled with a slam from the door when he entered, there he saw Moblit standing beside Erwin who was sitting on his chair looking very much worried.
"Levi, its been long since I saw you!" Erwin said with sweat dripping from his head, not wanting to look at Levi. Moblit whispered something on the commander's ears and ran out of the room, but while he got out he whispered through Levi's ear while reaching for the door "I'm sorry."
"Stop talking shit with me Erwin, we just saw each other this morning, now answer the damn question." Levi slammed his hands at Erwin's table, Erwin looked at him in the eye and Levi looked back at him.
"She… She is…. D-doing some some research." Erwin told Levi after some moments, but Levi saw through him, he know he's lying.
"You bastard… y-you're lying aren't you!?" levi yelled at his commander, not caring if he is his superior or what, all he cares for now is Hanji.
"I-is Hanji still alive? Injured?" Levi asked Erwin with fury and fright being heard within his voice, scared of what might the answer will be.
"N-no." Erwin said with a guilty tone, but Levi heard through the answer, he knows he meant to say yes.
Levi backed away from Erwin, shivers conquering his body. Erwin stood up and said "Levi please don't!" Erwin yelled at Levi but it was too late, Levi already left within a blink of an eye heading to the infirmary, Erwin chased him but was too late.
Levi stood there looking at Hanji with Moblit, Mike, Nanaba and the 104th trainee squad around her. She looks awful, like she was dying. Her stomach is bandaged but you can literally see that there are still some blood showing up.
Levi's sight was getting blurry because of the tears he is shedding, not minding even if the one's who looks up to him saw him at this state. He saw there Hanji looking at him with dark circles under her eyes, smiling with ease, like nothing happened to her.
Levi walked slowly to her not wanting to accept the reality that Hanji might die because of her injury.
"You idiot! Why didn't you tell me!" Levi yelled at Hanji when their finally face-to-face. Hanji replied with a weak smile.
"I didn't want to make you sad and have an outrage and blame the people who were with me in the expedition… I didn't want to worry you with such a thing… I'm sorry." Hani said with a weak tone and smile. Levi came closer to her.
"You damn four-eyes! You already make me worry everyday with you stupidity! I'm your fucking fiancée! Why didn't you tell me!? Stupid stupid stupid! i… I wasn't there to protect you… and now… and now… you're… d-dying!" Levi yelled. "You're blaming yourself? But why? I'm the stupid one who wasn't able to protect myself after years of killing titans." Hanji laughed a little holding Levi hands, intertwining her fingers with his'.
"Hell yeah you are." Levi mumbled, cursing himself and the titans. Hanji moved her hand through Levi's face, while Levi held her hand, caressing it like it was some precious diamond.
"I'm sorry I broke our promise… I'm not gonna be able to give the family you've always wanted… I'm not gonna be able to marry you, to be with you… to be with you till the day we grow old, till the day we die…. A-and the day humanity finally wins… i-I'm sorry…" Hanji said tears falling from her eyes, but still, a smile with hope is still plastered on her.
"You idiot! Stop smiling like you're okay! Stop apologizing, you didn't do anything wrong! If you want… you can make up for it by staying alive… p-please… you're the only thing I have left… I-I can't lose you… I can't take it… please… I beg you… don't leave me in this shitty world…. Please don't!" Levi, the strongest soldier ever known, was surrounded with people who looks up to him, seeing he also has a weak side, pleading to the person he loves most, the only person who represents as the only light and hope in his life.
"I'm smiling because… I want you to remember me as a person who will always smile brightly and give you happiness with it… it's the least I can do to you after breaking out promise." Hanji said still smiling as much as she can.
"You idiot… I hate you." Levi whispered, shivering with fears for the first time. After a moment, something struck through Levi's veins, he suddenly felt having a tantrum, and he did.
"GRRRAA! THOSE FUCKING TITANS! I'M GOING TO SMASH THEIR HEADS TO PIECES! I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL THEM! THEY'RE GONNA PAY! THEY'RE GONNA PAY!" Levi yelled through the room. By now, Erwin, Mike, Moblit and the 104th trainee squad held back from making Levi destroy more stuff inside the infirmary, he was having an outrage, a big one, and he takes it all out to the stuff inside the infirmary.
They all couldn't hold it back anymore, they were getting weak and sweaty, while Levi is still having a tantrum not even getting a little weak (well that's what you should expect from the ackermans.)
"Moblit! The injection! NOW!" Erwin commanded Moblit. "B-but sir! Its corporal Levi were talking here! He's too strong, he'll kill me!" Moblit disobeyed "Well you and us might die right now from holding Levi back from destroying the infirmary, now do it!" Erwin yelled at him, so Moblit didn't have a choice, he stabbed the injection that can calm the body down of a human and make them pass away at Levi, and it worked.
Levi was falling from the floor. His vision became blurry and it seems everything around him was moving slowly. The last thing he could see was all his friends gathering around her screaming his name, but, his eyes was all on Hanji. While Levi fell from the floor, his eyes almost closing, his eyes and ears managed to see and hear Hanji who said "I love you!" to him, Levi didn't know but, he whispered the words "Shitty-glasses…. I love you too."
hours has passed and Levi was sitting on a couch inside the infirmary, sleeping. A while later, he woke up, he looked around and found everyone asleep. He walked up to Hanji who's eyes were closed.
"Oi… wake up!" Levi said to Hanji, hoping she would respond, but she didn't, this made him worry and cry a little.
"Oi Shitty glasses! Wake up! Don't play deaf! You're not dead! Wake up! Don't leave yet or else I'm gonna kill you, you moron!" Levi yelled at Hanji shakeing her hoping she would wake up. Because of Levi yelling, Erwin, Mike, Nanaba, Moblit and the 104th trainee squad woke up.
They all came near to Levi and would try to make him stop even though he's not having much of a tantrum. But Levi yelled at the, saying to stay back and threatening them, holding/hugging Hanji closer to him.
"Hanji... Please wake up.." Levi said tears falling once again. He didn't know what to do, so he kissed her and kissed her saying "I hate you!" every after kiss. After the last kiss, he held her more thightly than before and said "I love you I'm sorry! " over and over again.
Erwin and the others tried to take off Levi from Hanji, at first he didn't listen, but because of feeling emotionally and physically weak, he obeyed and ran through his room, crying and crying for the first time in his life, he was actually showing that he was in despair.
Days have passed and Levi never left the room, he didn't even bother to clean or anything, he tried but it just makes him remember about Hanji more.
the time came when Hanji's dead body will finally be burried. everyone was going, exept for Levi.
And knock came through Levi's door, he didn't answer it but still, someone came in without permission. It was Eren, Mikasa and Armin. Levi was pissed.
"Um, Corporal? Aren't you going?" Armin asked his superior. Levi just made a 'tch' sound. "Damn brats, get out! I'm not coming." Levi hissed at them. "B-but why!? If you really love squad leader Hanji, you should come to her-" Eren was trying to convince Levi but Levi cut him off "Shut the fuck up and get out!" Levi yelled at the three of them, they didn't have any choice but to leave, exept for Mikasa.
Armin and Eren left the room, but Mikasa stayed. Levi looked at her intently, glaring at her, she did the same.
"What do you want?" Levi hissed at Mikasa. "I want you to go to squad leader's death…" Mikasa said simply "I can't! now get out! NOW!" Levi yelled at Mikasa, but she just shook her head, which made Levi angry.
Levi ran to Mikasa and tried to punch her, but Mikasa avoided it and instead she quickly grabbed Levi's arms and twisted it, this surprised Levi but he should've expected this from an Ackerman and she is the top one trainee after all, and also, he was at a bad state which made him a little weak too.
"Look, I don't care if you're my superior right now or if Eren will get mad at me for doing this but, Squad Leader Hanji loved you so much! She wouldn't want seeing you like this! She'd be sad!" Mikasa yelled at Levi "I DON'T CARE!" Levi yelled at her.
"YOU DON'T CARE!? You were the one who had a tantrum a while back then and kept on whining and whining! And now you're saying that you don't care!? And you do realize the last word she heard from you was that you hate her! Moping around crying over her death wouldn't bring her back to life! The least you can do is to go to her death and-" Mikasa was cut off by Levi "AND WHAT HUH!? WHAT!? CRY IN FRONT OF HER DEAD BODY LIKE A LITTLE KID!?" Levi asked Mikasa. Mikasa calmed down and let go of Levi. She just stared at him.
"You know corporal… if I died and Eren did all this after I'm dead, I would get mad and upset… because he said he will explore the world, but that wouldn't come true if he just moped around because of me… I would feel pretty guilty too if its because of my death that he's moping around…I want him to still live happily with his life even if I'm gone…. i'm sure Squad leader Hanji would feel the same as i do... Squad leader might've broke her promise but, it doesn't mean you have to break yours… Please go on with your life, its want Squad leader wants. It'll make her happy." Mikasa told Levi looking at him eye-to-eye. She was doing this because she believed in Levi and Hanji's love, made it an inspiration, making her believe that she and Eren has hope of becoming lovers, so she didn't let his superior's love for each other to go to waste.
All Levi could do was cry on the floor, thinking how he could've made Hanji upset because of this. After a while, Mikasa handed a piece of paper to him.
"What's this?" Levi asked "A letter squad leader Hanji wrote for you when she was in the infirmary. She wanted me to give it to you." Mikasa said simply and left the room, but before she could, Levi said something first "Oi you sentimental brat… don't be so fucking oblivious… Eren does have a thing for you, he's just obsessed with beating the titans and trying to be just as strong as you so that he can protect you instead of you protecting him… I know the titan brat is a moron and doesn't realize he has a thing for you but, I'm sure he has, that's kind of what happened to Hanji and me. And besides, the two of you are also a pair of abnormals, like Hanji and I, so I'm sure you would fit together. And keep an eye on him, the kid's a moron sometimes." Levi told Mikasa. Mikasa blushed at the thought of Eren and her being a perfect couple. She saluted her superior and left.
Levi looked at the piece of paper, observing it and finally opened it. "Tch, you're full of surprises huh?" Levi said and he began reading the letter.
Dear clean freak,
As you know I'm already slowly dying. I'm sorry if I broke our promise, I didn't mean it, so please don't kill me when I'm already dead for.
Please don't cry, mope around and have an outrage every minute when I'm gone, it'll upset me very much.
Continue on being humanity's strongest, fight not just for me but also for humanity, I know I don't have the right to say this because I just broke our promise but, please promise me you'll continue on living, breathing and fighting till the end, please.
Please remember me till the end even if there's someone new in you life. Please remember that I will always love you, I'll always love your grumpiness, the way you're always a clean freak, and being an abnormal like me and of how much of a short guy you are.
I love you!
- Hanji Zoe-Ackerman
p.s, if you're gonna find another girl, please make sure its someone who's better than me, and i told you to drink your milk to grow taller! I still love you though!
After reading Hanji's letter, Levi cried and smiled for the first time since Hanji died.
"You shitty-glasses, It'll be hard finding someone better than you, you're the best person I've ever known and the only abnormal I've encountered… and you're still insulting me even after your death?" Levi said and smiled to himself. And with that, Levi wore his casual clothes, wore a black coat and went to Hanji's death. He knows that even if Hanji's dead already, she'll always be there, in his heart, and nothing can change that.
thanks for reading! even though its kinda long (and cheesey)! haha! have a good daay~! hope i've enlightened you guys!